Alone Again
by DragonKatGal
Summary: *Complete* Set directly after The Gift. Buffy is given another chance at life, love and all things slayage related.
1. Chapter One: Memories 1

SETTINGS:  Set after The Gift.

NOTES: Yes, we're Aussie, which means that colour has a 'u' in it!  Oh, just as a casual by the way, these characters aren't ours.  Which really does suck for us, but…they're not.  Except Court and Christian…and everything about the demons is made up.  

DISCLAIMER: *sighs* Wish it was ours.  Sadly it's not.

Feedback is good, but go easy.  We've never written a Buffy fanfic before, so…this is kinda our first attempt.  

I'm re-uploading this cos the italics and stuff were…well, stuffed.

­

**Alone Again**

CHAPTER ONE: MEMORIES 

Giles could see Dawn standing off to the side, the sobs racking her body, her hands covering her mouth.  Giles swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the sick, queer feeling he had in his stomach.  He took a step forward, not believing the sight in front of him.

She was lying on her back, looking as though she were asleep.  Asleep and not dead.  As he reached the large crate that she had fallen on, he fell to his knees, unable to bring himself to stay standing.  His eyes, aching from the emotion couldn't bring themselves to shed the tears that he desperately needed to cry.

So this was how Buffy had felt when her mother, the closest person to her, had died.

He hadn't hurt this much since Jenny Calender had died.  Since Joyce Summers had died.

In his life, he had loved exactly three women.  In his life, he had had to bury those same three women.  

He put a hand to her still warm-cheek, tears still staining her cheeks.  He tried to brace himself, tried to reconcile himself with what had happened.  He stood up, ignoring the shakiness of his knees, ignoring the way his body felt numb as he picked up Buffy's body in his arms.

He gave a quick look towards Xander and Anya, silently telling them that he was taking her away from here, away from the place that Buffy had hated before she had ever even seen it.

Willow, leaning on Tara for strength, began to follow him, ignoring the still sobbing blonde-haired man, cowering in the shadows as the sun continued to rise over Sunnydale.  She motioned towards Dawn to follow, but the young girl shook her head.  Willow hesitated a moment, but allowed her to take the moments that she wanted so she could be alone.

Giles had moved before Spike had even begun to let his body calm down, let his heart stop aching as much as it did.  He slumped onto the ground, suddenly not caring if the sun burnt him to a crisp.  All that mattered to him was being taken away.

He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up.  The crying young teenage girl knelt down, their two sobbing bodies melting into each other, trying to contain the emotion and complete heartache that each was feeling.

"You have to get out of here," she whispered through her sobs.

He shook his head, not having the strength, energy or the reason to get up and walk away from this place of death.

"The sun's coming up," he replied, his voice trembling.

"You can use your jacket to cover you," she suggested.  She didn't want to walk home alone, and she wasn't going to leave here without him.  She wasn't going to leave him there as the others had done.

He looked away from her, hating the sight of the 'ceremonial dress' she had been forced to put on.  Hating the two tears in it that showed the places where she had been cut.  Hating that he should have protected her, and here she was, trying to protect him.

She pulled his jacket off him, surprised by the weakness of his body and the lack of effort and strength that he was putting into saving himself from the sunlight that would kill him.  Covering his head carefully, she helped him to his feet and grabbed his hand, careful to hid any skin that showed from the sun that was trying to capture Spike's life.

Their run towards the house was quick, both still running from adrenaline, both knowing that their fatigued bodies would need to be rested, and soon.  She opened the door and let him inside, trying not to wince as she saw his hand beginning to sizzle from the heat of the daylight.

They entered the living room, the group having taken up a silent residence in the room, Buffy laying lifeless on the couch.  The exact same position that Buffy had found her mother in.  Dawn gasped, shocked at the sight that she had been trying to erase from her memory.

Spike, in a bout of new energy, picked Buffy up swiftly, ignoring the protests from Giles, and raced up the stairs, carrying the girl he had fallen in love with up towards her room.

He walked in, fresh tears coming into his eyes.  As he laid her down on her bed, he heard the door slam shut.  He whipped around to see if there was anyone else in the room, but it was just he and Buffy.  Alone.  The one thing he had wanted for months, but suddenly, he didn't want to be in here with her.  Not like this. 

He pulled up a chair and sat down by the bed, his hand holding hers, cold, dead.  Much like his own.

He saw that the drawer to her dressing table was open slightly, in it was her collection of stakes, crosses and holy water.  He opened it fully to see the entire collection.  There was at least five different chains and crosses lying neatly in the corner.  

He picked up the largest silver one, ignoring the pain and burning that his hand was going through.  He lifted Buffy's head up slightly and put the chain over her neck.

She had gone into the battle tonight without wearing the chain, perhaps realising that up against Glory, the chain would offer her no protection.

Sniffling, he caressed her face gently, wishing that she would wake up, perhaps tackle him, tell him to get his dead-cold hands away from her.  Call him a pervert, dead-boy, a monster.  Anything.

He withdrew his hand from her face and shut the dresser drawer.  He looked at her again and remembered every word of their last conversation.

_"We're not all going to make it.  You know that right?"_

_"I know.  Hey, I always knew I'd go down fighting."_

_"I'm counting on you…to protect her."_

_"To the end of the world.  Even if that happens to be tonight." _

He had failed.  He had promised to protect Dawn.  And in failing to protect Dawn, he had killed Buffy in the process.  It was his fault.  His.

Buffy wouldn't have died if he had have kept his word.  If he had have protected Dawn the way he said he was going to.

With new tears in his eyes, he stood up and left the room, running down the stairs, towards the front door.  He hesitated as he put his hand onto the door knob, knowing that opening the door would cause him an instant second death.  No one in the room next door would even care.

"Spike!"

He stopped.  All but one.  All but one wouldn't care.

He turned around to see Dawn racing towards him and into his arms.

He hugged her tightly, stroking her hair gently, the way he had seen Buffy do so many times before.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered.  Again and again he repeated that one phrase.  "I'm sorry.  I'm sorry."

She looked at him, scared, unsure, uncertain.

"Spike…you can't go out there.  The light…it'll kill you."

He stayed silent, his heart aching deeply.

"I can't stay here Nibblet."

"You're giving up?  Just like that?" Dawn cried angrily.

Spike looked away, unable to look her in the eyes, unable to see her tears.

"If you give up now then her death means nothing!"

"She died to save you, not to save me."

"She died to save all of us!  She died to save everyone in this stupid town, and the last time I checked, that includes you.  But if you really want to give up that easily, then burn.  It's hard to leave this world, but it's even harder to stay in it."

"I have to leave Little Bit," he whispered affectionately.  "I can't stay here.  I'm not welcome anymore."

"You'll always be welcome here."

He shook his head, still embracing the small girl.

"I'm sorry."

She looked away from him and stepped backwards.

"If you leave now…if you leave…" she trailed off, unable to finish.  She broke into sobs once more, making Spike wrap her in his arms.

"I'll stay.  For you.  I'll stay."

~*~

The house was still quiet, even though every member of the Scooby gang was in there.  Each was sitting in quiet contemplation.  Each of them had could feel their hearts aching, breaking, shattering.

Spike was sitting in the corner, his arms around Dawn protectively.  Neither of them had said a word since re-entering the house.

Xander stood up from his seat next to Anya and walked towards Willow, sitting next to Tara, looking stunned.  He held out his hand to her.  It took Willow a moment to register that Xander was standing in front of her.  She looked up at him, slightly unsure.  She took his outstretched hand and let him help her to her feet.

The two friends hugged tightly, desperately.  

They had known Buffy for longer than any of the others.  Buffy had made them what they had become.  

Willow had transformed from a shy, awkward girl to the stunning beauty standing in Xander's arms now.  To the confident, strong Wicca who had fought against a HellGod and very nearly won.

Xander had gone from the being a nobody with no talents and hardly any friends to being a confident young man, now engaged to the woman he loved.  And it was because of Buffy's strength that he had pulled through.

Xander and Willow understood each other.  They understood without a doubt that things were never going to be the same again.  That everything that had happened tonight was going to irreversibly affect each and every person in that room in one way or another.  From themselves, whom had befriended Buffy on her first day in Sunnydale five years ago, to Tara how had only just met her last year.

Willow finally let her tears begin to fall, as Xander knew would happen.  She had kept everything bottled up inside of her, too afraid to let her outer guard down.  She had wanted to live up to Buffy's expectations.  To be the "big gun" to be their "only hope."

But, she finally crumbled.  In Xander's arms, she knew that she could no longer hold onto her tears, could no longer hold onto the pain, the hurt and the heartache that she was feeling boiling up inside of her.

She clutched the back of Xander's shirt, sobbing against his shoulder.  With tears in his eyes, he told her that they would get through this.  Not that it would be alright, because he knew that those were not the words that Willow needed to hear, but that they would survive.

He knew what she needed, knew what she needed to hear, even though things had changed.  Even though he was with Anya and she was with Tara, he loved her unconditionally, just as he had told Buffy in the library so many years ago, just as he had told Willow when she was comatose in the hospital.

He didn't know how, but he knew that one way or another, they would get through this.

From her position on the couch, Tara gave a small smile, knowing that maybe, just maybe, they were going to get through this.

~*~

The group eventually began to dissolve, to fade away.  Tara and Willow left, hand-in-hand from Buffy's house.  In a quiet voice, Willow told Giles that she was going home, there was nothing she could do here to help.  Giles nodded, understanding.

"I'll see you in the morning I guess," Giles said uncertainly.

Willow nodded.  She leant over and kissed Giles' cheek, something she had never done before in her life.  He gave her a half smile and took her hand.

"Thank you."

Xander looked at Anya and stood up.  

"We should probably go as well."

Giles nodded and stood up.  He shook Xander's hand, and surprised, accepted the hug that Xander offered him.

"We'll make it through this," Xander said comfortingly.

Giles nodded and rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"I'm sure we will."

Xander took Anya by the hand and walked her slowly to the door.  When she nearly collapsed, he picked her up in his arms.

"We should get you to a hospital."

"No.  I just want to stay with you tonight," she whispered.  "But no inappropriately timed sex."

He nodded softly and continued to walk, holding her in his arms.

Giles looked towards Spike and Dawn.  Dawn was resting her head in Spike's shoulder, her eyes closed, tears still falling softly.

Spike looked down and kissed the top of Dawn's head.  He picked her up easily.

"Come on.  We'll get you to bed, okay?"

Dawn nodded, too tired and too weak to fight back.  He took her up the stairs, past Buffy's room where the door was thankfully shut.  He laid her down on her bed and found the pyjama's that were stashed underneath her pillow.

He helped her pull the pants on under the dress, and turned away like a true gentleman as she pulled the dress off and got into her t–shirt.  

He took the ceremonial dress off her and put it on a chair by her desk.  He knelt down on his knees by her bedside as Dawn slid under the covers, curling up like the frightened child that Spike knew she was.

He touched her face gently and wiped a tear away.

"I'll take care of you Little Bit.  I swear I won't let anything happen to you," he whispered.

Dawn smiled through her tears and nodded.  She watched as Spike stood up.

"Wait!"

He looked down at her.

"Will…will you stay with me?  Just until I fall asleep.  Please?" 

He nodded and pulled up the chair, throwing the dress onto the floor by the door.

"I don't know any good bed-time stories though."

She gave him a half-smile.

"Did…you loved her, didn't you?"

He nodded slowly and took her hand.

"You loved her too."

She nodded, her eyes filling with tears.

"What's your favourite memory of her?" she whispered.

He smiled softly.

"I have a great many favourites.  I was…when I was…"  He stopped, not wanting to admit to the evil that had been inside of him.

She nodded, understanding what he was trying to say.

"I remember when she got into trouble with the police.  She was accused of killing another girl."

"You mean Kendra?  The other Slayer?"

"Yeah.  Kendra.  She was walking through the park and she got to the road.  A cop car flashes it's lights and gets her with her hands on her head.  I saw it happen.  Suddenly, I jump out of the bushes and kick the wanker's ass," he said.  

Dawn gave a small laugh at his description.

_"Hello cutie."_

_Buffy hit him hard in the face.  He grabbed her by the shoulders, but she knees him in the groin._

_"Will you hold on a second!"_

_Buffy pulls out a stake and Spike steps back quickly._

_"Hey, white flag out, I quit."_

_…_

_"Why would you ever come to me?"_

_"I want Dru back. I want it like it was before he came back.  I don't like the way she acts around him."_

_"You're pathetic."_

"I whacked her one, but she gave back as good as she got.  She eventually agreed to listen to me, and we ended back up here.  We get to the front lawn and…and your mum comes into the driveway.  I figured she would have known about Buffy being the Slayer, seeing as I knew Buffy and your mom were close."

_"What, you're mum doesn't know?"_

_"Know what?" Joyce asked._

_"That I'm uh…in a band.  A rock band with Spike here."_

_"Right, she plays the…the triangle."_

_"Drums," Buffy said quickly._

_"Drums yes…she's uh, a hell on the old skins, you know."_

"I think that was my favourite moment," he said fondly.  "She had a sense of humour that girl."

"You loved her even then," Dawn said.  It wasn't a question.  She knew the truth.

"I wanted her dead," he said, his head hanging in shame.  "I guess I should have been careful what I wished for."

~*~

Giles looked up as Spike came down the stairs.

"You were up there a long time," he commented.

Spike shrugged, almost challenging him to say something more.

"She didn't want to be alone.  I stayed until she fell asleep."

Giles nodded and watched as Spike took a seat.

"What, uh…what happens now?  To Lit…to Dawn?" Spike asked.

"Honestly, I don't know.  I uh…we should see what she wants to happen.  If she uh…if she wants to stay here in Sunnydale, or…or if she wants to go back and live with her father in…in some remote region of Spain," Giles said.

"Her father…have…have you called him?"

"No.  No, I haven't."

Spike nodded and reached for the phone.

"Uh, I don't know if that's such a good idea," Giles said, looking at his watch.  Spike glanced at the clock.  6:47am.  He shrugged and flipped through the address book by the phone.

"Wouldn't it be best to wait until a little later?" Giles asked.

"If she was your daughter, wouldn't you want to know?" Spike asked angrily.

Giles looked away ashamed.  He had wanted to keep the calls until as late as possible.  Possibly to stop himself from having to face up to the actuality of what had happened.

He watched as Spike dialled the number and waited.

After a few seconds, he slammed down the phone impatiently.

"Bloody answering machine."

Giles looked away, almost relieved that Spike had been unable to contact Buffy's father.  Contacting her only living relative besides Dawn made the situation seem all too real for him.

"Yes…Buffy said…she said she had trouble getting a message through to him when Joyce passed away," Giles explained softly.

Spike threw himself towards the couch, slumping down into it and holding his head in his hands.

Giles stood up, hating the awkward silence that was hanging between them.

"I'll get some cream for you.  You're covered in wounds."

Spike nodded and looked away as Giles left and headed into the kitchen.

_"Spike, you're covered in sexy wounds."_

That had been the night that she had kissed him.  

_"What you did for Dawn and for me, that was real.  I won't forget it." _

Giles re-entered and knelt down.  He dabbed iodine on Spike's cuts, apologising softy as Spike flinched away.

"What you did tonight…" Giles trailed off, not really certain of what he wanted to say.

"What I did tonight was fail.  I failed her.  I killed her."

"No!  No you didn't," Giles cried.

Spike shook his head slowly and stood up, getting away from Giles.

"I couldn't protect Dawn.  I swore to protect her and I didn't.  She…she's dead because I failed her!  Because I couldn't live up to what I said I would do."

"Spike, listen to me.  You no more killed Buffy than I did.  She died because she worked out that she had to die.  That the only way to save this wretched planet was for her to sacrifice the biggest thing she could.  Herself."

"But she shouldn't have had to!" Spike yelled.  "She shouldn't have had to have sacrificed herself, because I should have been up there.  I should have tried to get up there as soon as I knew there was someone up there with her.  I should have been up there from the start."

"You weren't to know Spike!  It was not your fault!  She made a choice.  She made the right choice."

"She shouldn't have had to have made the choice.  The plan was to stop Glory from starting the ritual, and the ritual began!"

"At least you tried!  You were up there."

"It wasn't enough.  Nowhere near it.  I wasn't enough for her."

~*~

For nearly twenty two hours, there was silence in the living room.  Spike's thoughts kept creeping back up to the room upstairs where Buffy lay on her bed, dead, cold.  Alone.

Giles had fallen into a fitful sleep on the couch, and Dawn was still upstairs sleeping soundly, exhausted from her earlier ordeal, and the shock of losing her sister.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, a thought clicked over.  They had gone to rescue Dawn early on Saturday morning, just after four o'clock.  When the battle was over, the sun had been rising.

She had died on a Saturday.  Fresh teas sprang to Spike's eyes as he remembered his first words to her.

_"Who are you?" she had asked._

_"You'll find out on Saturday."_

_"What happens on Saturday?"_

_"I kill you."_

He had killed her.  Him.  Not without the help of a malicious hellgod, but he had killed her.

He sniffled back his tears and looked across at Giles who was holding his glasses in one hand and his head was resting in his other.  Spike tried to regain a hold of his emotions, trying desperately to be strong, at least until he could get back to his crypt and let his heart shatter into a million pieces.

"We should…we should probably try again tomorrow morning to get a hold of her father. So he can come here for the uh…for the funeral," he said slowly.

Giles rubbed his eyes tiredly.  "Of course…yes…the uh…the funeral.  We should…I'll uh…I'll arrange that in the morning."

Spike nodded and looked towards the clock.  5:30am.

"I should…I should go.  The sun will be up again soon, and…my skin doesn't react well with sunlight."

Giles nodded and stood up.

"Right.  Right.  I'll uh…I'll uh…I'll call you when I know what's going to happen."

"I'll be back here tonight.  Just to…just to check up on Little Bit."

Giles gave a small smile at the endearment.

"Why do you call her that?"

"Because…she's a little bit of Buffy.  And, right now, I think she really needs to hear that."

Giles nodded and shook Spike's hand, a first for them as well.

"Thank you for…for being here tonight," Giles said.

Spike nodded and went to leave.

"I uh…" Giles' voice stopped Spike.  

Spike turned to face him, wondering what he could possibly say, possibly do to make any of this any easier.

Giles looked away, unable to tell him that he understood Spike's love.  Unable to tell him that there was never going to be an easy way to get through this.  And unable to tell Spike that he was grateful for Spike's love for Buffy and for Dawn.

"I'll see you tomorrow."

~*~

Dawn woke up in her bed, startled.  Her dream had woken her up with a shock.  She had been falling, falling.  But it hadn't been her.  It had been Buffy.  She had seen what Buffy had seen, felt what Buffy was feeling as she had fallen to her death.

The endless fall, the bright light of the vortex, and…the end.

It was as though Dawn had woken up in Buffy's body.  Lying there.  Helpless.  Hopeless.  Dead.

Dawn wiped the sleep and the tears from her eyes and stood up a little shakily.

She moved down the corridor and stopped.  The door to Buffy's room was open slightly.  She pushed it further open and gasped. 

Her sister was still lying there, pale, cold.  Dead.

Giles was sitting there next to her, holding her hand, speaking to her softly.  Dawn stood quietly in the doorway, feeling guilty for listening, but uncontrollably drawn to hear what he had to say.

"I thought I was prepared for this Buffy.  I thought that I would be able to handle it.  I thought…Buffy…"

She watched as he wiped the tears from his eyes.

"Buffy, when I saw you that first day in the library…I thought you wouldn't last five minutes…I thought that…I thought that you wouldn't be able to handle the pressures of being the Slayer, but…you proved me wrong.  You handled being the Slayer.  You handled having friends, having a boyfriend who was a vampire.  You handled it when he turned bad again.  You saved the world so many times, and…you made me love you like I would love a daughter.  You trusted me even though I betrayed you in he worst of ways."

Betrayed?  Dawn suddenly understood.  When Giles had drugged her just after her eighteenth birthday.  Some Watcher's  Council test to make sure Buffy wasn't just about her strength.  She had passed with flying colours, but had ended up hating Giles, until she realised how reluctant he had been about performing the test.

"Buffy, I don't know what to do now.  I wasn't meant to get so attached to you, you know that.  I wasn't meant to love the Slayer like a daughter.  I got thrown off the Council, but that couldn't stop me.  Nothing could.  Buffy…I don't know what to do with Dawn…I don't know how to handle this."

The door creaked a little and Giles jumped up, startled.  He cleared his throat and looked at Dawn.  She could tell he hadn't slept as well as she had.

"Dawn," he said softly.

She gave a small smile, trying not to look past him, but unable to tear her eyes away from her sister.  She walked over towards the bed and looked down.  She put a gentle hand to Buffy's face.

"Dawn…I uh…Spike tried to call your father last night…"

She looked at him, drawing her hand away from her sister's face, not quite certain how to react.

"And?"

"He wasn't at home.  We're going to…to try again so he can be here…for uh…for-"

"For the funeral," Dawn finished, her voice shaking.

Giles nodded.

"I uh…put in a call to the uh…to the funeral parlour.  He said that…that it would be ready by uh, Wednesday.  So…I was thinking we should have the funeral in the morning."

"No!"

He looked at her, startled by her outburst.  

"No," she repeated, more calmly.

He stared at her blankly, hoping she would give an explanation.

"Not in the morning. Not during the day.  Spike…"

It dawned on Giles suddenly what the young girl was trying to say to him.

"Of course…of course.  At night.  I'll…I'll see what I can do."

"Promise me?  Promise me you'll make it at night."

She took his hand and stared at him, begging him with her eyes to give her this request.

"I promise."

~*~

Tara watched Willow pacing restlessly around their bedroom, the one that she barely recognised.  Tara was sitting cross-legged on the bed, still in her pyjama's, her boots lying on the floor in a heap.

Willow stopped suddenly and looked at Tara.

"Angel!"

"What?"

"Angel!  We…we have to tell Angel.  He…he should know," Willow said quietly.

Tara stood up and took Willow's hand, facing her.

"Do you have his number?"

"I…I can't tell him over the phone.  He…he shouldn't have to find out over the phone.  That's…I…I have to go.  I have to go and tell him."

Tara nodded.  "Then you should go."  
Willow smiled, thankful that Tara understood.  

"Come with me?"

"Always."

________________________

Willow sat in the big open room of Angel's building, waiting for him to return from wherever he was.  Tara had opted to stay at the hotel they had booked while Willow told Angel about what had happened.

She looked up as she heard the door beginning to open.

"There's no place like-" Angel stopped as he saw Willow.

"Willow."

"What's she doing here?" Cordelia asked softly.

Angel and Willow looked eyes, and Willow knew that the sinking feeling she felt in her stomach was how Angel was feeling now.

"It's Buffy," he whispered softly.

He walked down the stairs to where Willow sat.  Willow stood up, still shaky from the power that had been drained from her earlier when she had reversed what Glory had done to Tara.

Angel took her hands gently and pulled her into a hug.

"What happened?"

Willow sniffled and pulled away from him.  She sat down on the couch and he quickly followed suit.

"She…she saved the world.  It…it was a choice between her and Dawn, and…and she chose to let Dawn live."

"But…but Dawn's not real!" Angel protested.

"Not real?" Cordelia repeated.  "She is real.  She's got way better dress sense than Buffy."

Angel shot her a look that immediately made her close her mouth.

"I'm sorry Angel," Willow whispered softly.

He stared blankly, looking through her, past her.

_"I love you."_

_"I love you."_

_"Close your eyes."_

Angel suddenly snapped to attention.  He grabbed Willow by the hand and dragged her towards the door.

"We have to go.  I have to see her.  Tonight."

Willow broke free of his grasp, surprising herself by the strength that she wasn't aware she had.

She held him by the arm softly, allowing him to walk away if he wanted to.

"There's nothing you can do," she whispered.

He looked away, tears in his eyes.

"I know.  I…I need to see her."

She nodded softly.

"Let me get back to Tara in the hotel, and I'll follow you back in the car."

Angel nodded.

"Meet us back here in front of the building in ten minutes," she said.  She took off hurriedly, leaving Angel, Cordelia, Wesley and Gunn in silence.

Cordelia put a hand to Angel's arm.  It took a moment for him to register that he was being touched.  He looked at her, tears in his eyes, tears in hers.

"I'm sorry."


	2. Chapter One: Memories 2

CHAPTER ONE: MEMORIES (cont'd)

Giles opened the front door, surprised that anyone would be knocking at the late hour of the evening.  His eyes widened in surprise as he saw who had been knocking.

"Angel."

"Giles."

Giles stepped back a little, opening the door fully for him.

"Come in."

Angel nodded and stepped forward, his eyes darting around the room, taking in all that he had missed in the last few years.

"Where…where is she?" he asked quietly.

Giles pointed towards the stairs.

"She's in her room."

"And Dawn?"

"In her own room."

"How is she?" Angel asked, his voice full of concern.

"As well as can be expected," Giles said.  

Neither man knew what to say, the awkwardness that was still between them from Angel torturing him, and the horrible situation of being brought together by death had silenced them both.

"I'll be in the kitchen," Giles said, giving himself an excuse for leaving Angel's presence.

Angel nodded and headed up the stairs.  He took in the photographs on the wall, the pictures of Buffy, Dawn and Joyce together.  The only member left was Dawn, and she herself was not really to be considered a member of the family.

He continued up the stairs, towards Buffy's room.  He entered, slowly, silently, almost as though he were afraid to break the code of silence that had descended upon the Summer's household.

He saw her and felt his heart shatter.  Part of him was still denying the fact that she was gone.  But as she lay there, unmoving, unbreathing he knew the truth.

He fell to his knees beside the bed, tears flowing freely from his cheeks.

"Buffy," he whispered softly.

_"You still my girl?"_

_"Always." _

He had left her nearly two years ago, knowing that he had to leave so that they could get over one another, knowing that they could never be together.  He could never go in the sunlight and she…she would grow up.  She would grow old.  And he would stay in the same body, never growing old.

She deserved a chance at a natural, normal life.  Instead, she had given her life up at twenty years old.

_"Let's just get you to fifty."_

_"Liking that plan." _

If only he had have known…he could have stayed.  Maybe things would have been different.

He heard the door swing open and turned to face his intruder.

"Angel," Dawn whispered, recognising the man that she had met only a handful of times.

"Dawn."

Dawn took a step forward and knelt down beside him, silently trying to hate the man for causing her sister so much grief.  On the upside, she knew that the years that Buffy had spent with Angel had been the best ones of her life.

"How are you?" he asked softly.

She looked away from him, unable to meet his eyes.

"Been better," she answered, her voice choking up with emotion.

He nodded softly.  "I understand the feeling."

He looked at her, his eyes gone cold, his mind going back to what Willow had told him.  That Buffy had given her life to save Dawn's.  So much like Buffy to give up her own life to save another's.  Just as she had done for him before she had graduated from High School, before the Mayor's Ascension.

_"Drink.  Drink me."_

Dawn stood up suddenly and backed away from him.

"You think it's my fault don't you?"

He cast his eyes downward for a second before trying to meet her gaze.

"No," he answered, not convincing her at all.

"You think I should have died.  I'm not real, right?  I mean, you know I'm just this big green ball of energy that some stupid monks made!  You think I wanted this?  You think I wanted any of this?" She yelled, tears rolling down her face.  "Do you think I wanted her to die?"

He looked away, ashamed that he had been as selfish as that.  To not realise that Buffy had wanted her sister to live, regardless of the fact that she technically wasn't real.  

"I didn't want this.  Any of this."

He stood up, going o take a step towards her.  She took a step away from him and held up a hand. 

"Don't.  Just don't."

~*~

**Wednesday Afternoon.  After sundown.**

Angel walked through the cemetery to find the group standing in a semi-circle around an open grave with a coffin suspended on brackets out of the ground.

The group had the screaming silence hovering over them once more, each of them staring at the deep mahogany coffin that held the girl whom they held dearly to their hearts.

Angel looked across the group and stopped suddenly, anger flaring up within him.

Spike was standing behind Dawn, his arms around her neck, protectively, comforting her.  He knelt down suddenly and whispered something in her ear.

Angel went to rush over towards them, tear Spike away from Dawn even though Dawn hated him, but instead he felt a hand touch his arm.

"Angel."

He turned to see Cordelia, Wesley and Gunn standing behind him, each in their best black and sombre outfits, fitting of the occasion.

"Cordy.  What are you doing here?"

Cordy tried to give a half smile through her unfallen tears.

"She was my friend too, you know."

Angel saw Wesley put a comforting hand onto Cordelia's shoulder.  The young woman turned around and found herself leaning into Wesley's embrace, reminded of a time long ago when she had found herself attracted to him.

Wesley stepped backwards and gave Cordelia a gentle push towards Gunn, who accepted the young woman's embrace a little awkwardly, eventually becoming more comfortable.

"I'll be over with Giles.  He's probably incredibly upset right now," Wesley explained.

Angel nodded, affirming his consent, and the fact that Giles being upset wasn't quite a strong enough phrase.

"Giles," Wesley greeted, causing the older man to turn around, startled to hear a voice calling his name in the silence.

"Wesley."

"It's good to see you again," Wesley said.  "I only wish it was in different circumstances."

Giles shook his head slowly, not really wishing to speak to the younger Watcher who had learnt that evil didn't come in 'controlled conditions', but in hoards and masses.

"Yes, so do I."

Wesley stood in silence a moment before looking past Giles towards where Dawn stood, still in Spike's embrace.

"Who's the young fellow with Buffy's sister?"

Giles turned and saw Spike and Dawn, looking as though they both wanted the earth to just suck them away from the graveyard.  Somehow, he wished he could join them if their wish was granted.

"That's Spike.  He's…he was a friend of Buffy's."

"Spike?  William the Bloody?"

"Yes," Giles said, answering only as much as he was prepared to offer.

"Does…does he have a soul as well?"

"No.  He chooses his own path."

Wesley stared at him intently before casting another look towards Spike and Dawn.

"A vampire without a soul holding a child in his arms.  Why do I feel so apprehensive?"

"He can be trusted."

Wesley looked at Giles doubtfully and continued to watch Spike with Dawn.

Wesley went to say something more but stopped as he saw the priest about to begin the ceremony that would confirm and finalise everything that no one there wanted to happen. 

~*~

People began to filter away as the ceremony came to an end, the gathering there was small, select.  Only those that Buffy had truly loved were in attendance.

Spike took Dawn by the hand and gently asked if she wanted to leave.

"Can…can we stay?  Just for a little longer?" 

He nodded and went to let go of her, but she continued to clutch at his hand, wishing that somehow their prayers would be answered.  That Buffy would be brought back to them.

Xander began to walk away, hand-in-hand with Anya who was still a little shaky after having a huge pile of bricks fall on top of her.  Xander gave Dawn a small encouraging smile, and continued to walk.

He stopped as he passed Giles.

"Did you want me to do a sweep tonight?" he asked softly.

Giles looked up, startled by the question.  He took off his spectacles, a confused look coming over his face.

"Perhaps…it would be best."

Xander nodded and covertly pulled a stake out from his sleeve.

"I figured one of us should be prepared."

"Yes…yes, of course."

Xander nodded and walked Anya over towards Willow and Tara.

"Anya, I want you to stay with Will.  I'm gonna do a sweep tonight…just in case."

Anya nodded and looked towards Willow, smiling slightly.

"Just…be careful."

Xander nodded and went off towards the main part of the cemetery, their old hunting ground to continue to do the work of the Slayer.  

Spike watched as Xander walked into the dark night, armed with only a stake and probably very little effort to be able to kill anything that attacked him.  He knelt down to Dawn's eye level and touched her shoulders.

"I'll be back in a few, okay?  Stay with Willow and the others."

"Where are you going?" 

"Making sure Lackbrain doesn't get himself killed," he explained.

He began walking in the direction he had seen Xander wander in, hoping that he could merely lurk in the shadows and not have to try and make conversation with a man whom he couldn't stand, but didn't want to see dead.

He watched from the cover of bushes as Xander walked slowly through the cemetery, his shoulders hanging.  Spike could tell Xander's heart was not into the sweep he had offered to do.  And if you're hearts not in it, there's the chance that if death knocked, you would gladly open up to it.

Spike jumped a little as he saw a vampire rush out of the bushes opposite, leaping towards Xander, craving for fresh blood.  

Xander made no sound as he swiftly punched the vampire in the face, sending the new and hungry vamp to the floor.  Before the vamp could get up to defend itself, Xander began to kick its chest, again and again, crying out in anger as he did it.

Spike stayed hidden in the bushes understanding that Xander had to release the anger and frustration he was bottling up inside of him.  Taking out his anger on the new vamp was dangerous though, and Spike lingered, knowing that if Xander didn't stake the vamp soon, there could be an inordinate amount of trouble.

The vamp rolled away from Xander's foot, getting quickly to its feet and facing off with Xander.  The vamp swung and hit Xander, making him stumble but not fall.  Xander regained his footing and grabbed the vamp's shirt collar and pushed his back into a crypt, holding the vamp with one hand at the throat, wielding a stake in a threatening position in the other.

Xander quickly staked the vamp and fell to the ground, sobbing loudly. 

Spike closed his eyes, not wanting to watch the silent grief of the man in front of him.  Instead, he turned and walked away, back to Dawn and those who loved _her._

~*~

_Spike held out his hand and smiled for the first time in the last week._

_"I'm glad you could make it pet."_

_Buffy looked up at him and gave a soft smile, taking his outstretched hand._

_"Were you waiting long?"_

_He shook his head, no.  "If I had to, I'd have waited forever."_

_She began leading him towards the entrance of his old crypt.  He hadn't been here since he had started to live in the Summer's home, taking residence in the basement, only to ensure he wasn't hit by any stray sunbeams._

_"Why are we here, luv?" he asked._

_She smiled coyly and lead him down the steps to his old hide-out.  The tv and VCR were gone, only to be replaced with large piles of dust and a cobweb with a small black spider in its centre._

_She stopped and turned to him, taking his other hand in hers._

_"Do you still love me?"_

_"'Til the end of the world."_

_She smiled and kissed him softly, letting her hands let go of his and move to his back, trailing up to his neck and playing with his short blonde hair._

_"Will you wait for me?"_

_He pulled away, staring at her in confusion._

_"Wait for you?  You're already here."_

_She smiled and kissed him again._

_"You know this isn't real."_

_He pressed his forehead against hers and stole another kiss.  "If it's a dream, then don't let me wake up.  I could stay here forever."_

_She stepped away from him, dropping her hands away from his body._

_"Wait for me."_

_He went to grab hold of her, but she took another step back._

_"You're leaving? Again?" he asked, his voice hurt, the betrayal showing very obviously._

_"I have to.  Will you wait?"_

_He shook his head.  "I don't want to bleeding wait!  I've already got you!"_

_She gave him a soft smile._

_She reached her hand out to him and put it on his chest.  "You've got me here." She moved her hand to his head, caressing his cheek as she moved up.  "And here.  But not where it counts.  Wait?"_

_He stared at her, hurt, but eventually nodded.  "I'll wait for you luv."[/I]_

Spike woke up with a start, taking deep gasps of air that his lungs didn't need.  He wiped the beads of sweat from his brow and law down on the bed that he had set up in the basement of the Summer's home.

He smiled, remembering the sweet kisses that his dream-girl had bestowed upon him.  

It was the first time his dream had ended with her still standing instead of lying flat on her back under a seven storey construction building.  

No matter how they ended though, the waking up would leave him to remember that she was gone.  And she wasn't coming back.

~*~

There were bright lights flashing around her, the whiteness stinging her eyes.  She held a hand up to shield them from the blinding light.

She felt someone take her hand and pull her to her feet.  She squinted in the light, trying to make out how the silhouette belonged to.

"Mom?"

The figure nodded and kept hold of her hand.

"Welcome home."

Buffy felt her heart leap into her throat.  She threw herself towards her mother, full of energy, suddenly full of life.

"It's so good to see you!" she exclaimed, taking a step back, trying to get a better look at her mom.  She tried to step around the other side so the light wouldn't be in her eyes, but wherever she went, the light kept shining at her.

Buffy stepped back, letting go of her mom's hand.

"Where are we?" she asked suddenly.

Joyce smiled and ran her hand through her daughter's hair.

"We're together.  That's what matters."

Buffy smiled and accepted her mom's warm embrace, enjoying the comfort that she felt as the arms encircled her.

Suddenly without warning, Buffy felt her mom being ripped away.  She tried to keep hold of her mom's hand, but the hand seemed to evaporate, and Buffy was being thrown backwards, plummeting into the darkness she had only just come from.

"Mom," she whispered softly, hating the heavy feeling in her chest.  She had lost her mom for a second time.  

Buffy felt herself fall onto a hard area, concrete, metal, sand, snow, she didn't know which.  

She stood up shakily, looking around her, trying to establish her bearings.

Buffy found herself standing inside her house.  Her heart leapt up, thinking that perhaps everything had just been a dream.  That maybe there was going to be another chance to save Dawn from Glory.

She saw the door to Dawn's room open and Dawn come walking out.

"Dawn!"

Dawn didn't turn, instead, she walked straight through Buffy, towards Buffy's room.  She opened the door, closing it as she went in.  Buffy tried to grasp the door handle, but felt her hand go through the door.  She took a step through the solid door and walked into the room, wondering what her sister was looking at.

She gasped as she saw herself lying on the bed, wearing the white top and grey pants that she had chosen for comfort and style.  She walked further in and saw Angel kneeling beside her body, weeping silent tears.

She went to walk forward, but Dawn, Angel and her dead body disappeared.  

She came face to face with Willow and her old self on the day after she had come back from her stay in another hell.  She watched as Willow and the old Buffy argued, each of them crying.  She watched as her mom walked in, angry, loving, caring.

Buffy followed them as they took the fight downstairs, but instead of there being the partygoers that had been there that night, she found herself watching the old Buffy walk into the house and find flowers for her mom.  

The old Buffy walked into the living room to see her mother lying on the couch, her eyes open, her heart still.

_"Mom?  Mom?  Mommy?" _

Buffy closed her eyes, hating that she was reliving the most painful day of her life.  

She opened them again and found her mother's body gone.  She looked around her and saw a blonde figure sitting in a seat, holding a fire poker.  Glory.

Dawn walked in behind where Glory and the old Buffy were arguing civilly, discussing the key that Buffy had 'stolen' from Glory.

Buffy took a step forward, forgetting that she could do nothing to stop the scenes of the past.  She rushed out of the living room and into the kitchen.

_"You walk out of this house, don't even think about coming back."_

Another painful moment in her life.  The day she was thrown out of her house and managed to kill her boyfriend all in one hit.  Not to mention losing Kendra, having Giles ripped away from her and managing to put both Xander and Willow in the hospital.  Not one of her finest hours.

She followed her former self out the door, only to find herself seated on the steps, Spike next to her, his hand reaching awkwardly to her shoulder and patting it comfortingly.  She watched as Spike withdrew his hand and continued to sit by her side.

She closed her eyes, trying to forget where she was, trying to forget where she had been.

She opened her eyes again and found herself holding onto the hand of the silhouette who had welcomed her before.  Her mom.

"It's good to have you here Buffy."

Buffy's heart smiled as Joyce stepped forward and hugged her daughter tightly, almost as though she was never going to let go.

The bright lights began to diminish and as Buffy managed to open her eyes completely, she took in their surroundings.  It was as though they were walking on a sheet of glass, but there was nothing there.  They were walking on air, looking down at the world with no fear.  No fear of falling.  No fear of dying.  No fear.

Buffy smiled as Joyce nodded towards the right and began taking her daughter in that direction.

Buffy didn't know what her journey earlier had meant.  All she knew was that she was glad she was finally with her mom.

~*~

Angel, having left Cordelia with Wesley and Gunn, watched as Dawn and Spike led the others back to the Summers' residence. He was having a hard time trying to figure out how exactly Spike fit into their little group. 

Both Willow and Xander, and even Giles seemed to feel nothing was amiss as he entered the house. A few months ago he had heard rumours that there was a vampire who killed his own kind and was in alliance with the Slayer. 

But Spike?  

The idea that Spike, of all vampires, would seek to help the Slayer was just ludicrous. Kill her perhaps, but nothing more.

Why would Spike chose to help her?  Why chose to fight his own kind?  The word would have spread if Spike had have been cursed with his soul.

Angel knew Willow was a powerful enough Wicca to perform the restoration of a vampire's soul, but why Spike's?  

Even if it were true, he reassured himself, Buffy would have told him about it.

His own childer, turned to the side of the light.  It wasn't necessarily a bad thing, having one vampire out of the blood contest was definitely a good thing, but…the question was why?  And how?  And for how much longer?

How long would Spike pull this stunt before turning on them all?

Angel couldn't help but think for a split second that it had been Spike who had killed Buffy.  That for a moment in time when he was fighting evil, he had thought to himself 'what am I doing?' and turned evil again.

Angel knew that he was reaching for an answer, but the desperation to find an answer was driving him to unlikely conclusions.

He sighed softly, knowing that even though he wanted to find the answers, he had a life in LA that he needed to get back to.  He had friends, and a job and…a responsibility.

Buffy was gone, and there was nothing he could do about that.

He silently resolved to stay in touch with Giles to keep tabs on his childe, and in the mean time, all he could do was wait.

~*~

Spike watched from Buffy's bedroom window and Angel stalked away into the night. As tempting as it was to go after him, he was needed here.

"Spike?" a tentative voice called.

Turning, Spike left Buffy's room, and sought out the person who had called him. Willow smiled at him gently as he stepped into the hallway. She had such knowledgeable eyes, he felt as though she could see straight into his dead heart to what he was feeling. He glanced quickly into Dawn's room, before turning back to Willow.

"How's she doing?" he asked.

Willow tilted her head to the side a little, telling him silently that Dawn was still completely beside herself with grief.

"Not fantastic, she's still awake."

"Do you want me to sit with her for a while," he offered.  "You and Tara should get home. Get some sleep."

Willow looked gratefully at the blond vampire, and not for the first time her heart went out to him. His pain was so obvious, but he chose to rise above it and be strong for the rest of them. 

"Thank you," she said softly, her voice rising to no more than a whisper.  "I don't know that Dawn will be sleeping much tonight though.  You might be stuck here until tomorrow."

 Spike shrugged. Hell, he thought, it's not like I have any plans for tomorrow anyway. 

Willow touched his shoulder gently as he passed her to walk into Dawn's room.

"Spike?" she called.

He stopped and turned to her.

"Good night."

He smiled a little and whispered the same to her.

He walked quietly into Dawn's bedroom and took the chair where Willow had been. He sat, watching as Nibblet tried to keep her tears to herself.  Slowly her breathing calmed and fell into a rhythm, telling Spike that she was finally asleep. He carefully stood and stretched his legs quietly, trying not to wake her.   He crept out of her room and back into Buffy's.

He knew he shouldn't be in there, but it was almost as though he was magnetically drawn towards her room. He could almost feel her presence in the room, her smell lingering in the air, taunting his nostrils, mocking his senses. 

He lay down across Buffy's bed keeping his boots clear of the quilt. Her scent was all over the bed, and as he ran his hands back and forth over the quilt, he closed his eyes, willing his tears not to fall.

"_Hello Cutie."_

_"Who are you?"_

_"You'll find out on Saturday."_

_"What happens Saturday?"_

_"I kill you."_

Spike smiled at his own arrogance as he remembered the first time he had seen her fight. Such beauty, such rhythm, and something unique that made her Buffy. 

Whatever it was, she had pulled him in hard and fast. He brought his fingers to his lips and smiled as he remembered the soft kiss she had given him not long back. 

Of course, he had thought her to be his robot, not to mention the fact that he had been badly beaten and unable to enjoy it as much as he would have had he been completely aware. But still…she had kissed HIM.

"_What you did for me, and Dawn...that was real.  I won't forget it."_

Suddenly the tears that seemed so under control only seconds ago began to fall uncontrollably.  He lay there, taking in the scent of the girl who he knew he would be in love with for the next hundred years, and who could now never love him back.

~*~

Buffy watched in amazement with her mother, as the scene unfolded before her. She watched him as he watched over Dawn as she slept, and then stared, dumbfounded, as he went into her room and lay there crying for her. Her. 

The man…vampire she had taunted mercilessly and punched more times than she could remember was mourning her. She had given him no hope of ever returning his affections, and he lay there, crying for her death. 

She unconsciously reached out as if to comfort him, before realising that it was only a vision, and that she was the one person who would never be able to comfort him. 

Joyce studied her daughter take in all that she had seen, and saw the emotions that swept across Buffy's face. After a moment Buffy turned in shock, oblivious to the teasing smile on her mother's face.

"He loves me. Really, really loves me."

Joyce gathered up Buffy in her arms, much like she used to when Buffy had been five, holding her closely.

"You've always known that honey. You were just too scared to believe in it."

"But…he can't…he…can he?"

Joyce gently brushed a strand of hair away from her daughter's face.

"You've seen that he does. He always will."

Buffy sighed, knowing that her mother was right, but not yet ready to come to terms with what that meant. Besides, it was too late now. She'd never have the chance to tell him.

She didn't know what she would tell him even if she had the chance to go back and tell him something.

Not that it mattered.  She would never get the chance to tell him anything ever again.  She would never be able to talk to him again, see him in the flesh, or touch him.  He would never be able to see her, even though she was able to watch him as he continued to go through life.


	3. Chapter Two: Life Goes On

CHAPTER TWO: LIFE GOES ON

Spike stood back and watched again from the bushes as Xander patrolled for the evening.  He was alone, toting only a few stakes and a cross.  It was the first time that Xander had patrolled alone, Spike was sure of it.

Somehow, Spike knew that Xander would need backup, and if he didn't, then…more power to him.

He watched, his eyes darting back and forth, watching Xander's back.  It was peculiar to be watching, to be protecting the boy…the man who had once been the enemy.  

Spike and Xander professed to hate each other, but when it came down to it, there was no real animosity between them.  The only thing that stopped them from being close was the fact that Spike was a vampire.

The two had formed a bizarre bond during the time that Spike had stayed with Xander when Giles had told Xander to look after Spike.  In some ways, it was Spike who had finally convinced Xander that he was in love with Anya.  Anya was 'threatened' by a harmless Spike, and Xander silently confessed his love for her.

Spike stood to attention as he saw a vampire rise from a grave only a few meters away from Buffy's.  

For a second, his thoughts went to a place where they had never been before.  He was glad that she hadn't been killed by a vampire.  It had taken a god to defeat her, and even then, Buffy didn't have to go.  She had chosen to.

Sacrificing herself so that Dawn could live.

Spike snapped back into the present and watched as Xander defended himself quite well.  For someone with no training, he handled himself bravely with very little fuss.

Somehow, without having being told, Spike knew that Xander's power was something that he was drawing from Buffy.  From Buffy's death to be exact.

Xander was pissed off and using it to the best of his ability.  Spike had to admit that he himself had pummelled a vampire the other night, beat it to a bloody pulp before slaying it.  And in those few seconds that it took to take an unlife, he had felt as though he had control over his life.

The second the other vampire was lying in the grass, no more than dust, everything came crashing back to earth for him.  Buffy was dead.  He was dead.  She wasn't coming back.  And he couldn't leave.

Spike turned and walked away, knowing without seeing that Xander was going to be victorious against the newly risen vampire, if only to take some sort of revenge on everything evil for Buffy's death.

He heard the telltale gasp and a 'whump' as Xander dusted the vamp, and Spike continued walking, knowing that under any other circumstance, he would have been smiling now.

~*~

It was getting late in vampire hours, coming close to five in the morning.  Vamps were beginning to go back to their crypts and hideouts.  Willy the Snitch was beginning to close down shop and head home for the night when the doors to his bar swung open.

He looked up apprehensively.  

"C-can I help you?"

The young man smiled sardonically and sat down at the bar without saying a word.

"Beer?  Bourban and coke?  Water?"

"Nothing," he yelled.

The few remaining vamps turned to look at the vampire at the bar who was commanding their complete attention with only one word.

"I am here for the Slayer."

Willy looked around nervously, not wanting to tell this demon that he was out of luck.

"You're a little late," said one of the vamps beside the pool table.

The brown haired vamp turned and stood up, making his way to the pool table.  He grabbed the other vamp by the throat digging his nails in tightly.

"What do you mean 'too late'?"

"She's dead," the vamp choked out.

The brown haired vamp released his grip.  For a moment, Willy thought that all hell was about to break loose.  Until, that is, the vampire smiled.

"Excellent."

The vamp who was rubbing his throat looked up at the taller vamp, wondering why that came as such good news.

"Why is it," began the taller vamp, "that you're in a town, on the Hellmouth, with a dead Slayer on your hands, and you're in here drowning your sorrows in store bought blood?  You could be out there, feasting, yet you stay here."

"The sun is coming up," replied the defiant vampire who know had slight bruises from where the other vamp had grabbed him by the neck.

"Who's actually fed tonight?  Fed properly."

"We all have," the vamp replied.

"How many?  One person each?  You could rule this town, yet you stay here?"

The vampire straightened himself up, reaching his full and impressive height.

"You need a leader, someone to give you guidance, someone to give you a push.  I nominate me.  Who has objections?" the vamp asked, looking at the other vamp who had experienced sharp fingernails in his neck only moments ago.

"I object.  You're here for two minutes and suddenly you think you own the place."

"I do."

With that simple sentence, the taller vampire grabbed hold of the other vamp's neck and twisted it sharply, breaking it.  The vamp fell to the floor and dusted immediately.

"Anyone else have any objections?"

There was a murmour of noise, everyone shaking their heads 'no'.

"Good.  Then I am you're leader.  My name is Court, but you may call me Master."

~*~

_Spike rolled over in bed and smiled at the familiar sight.  As beautiful as ever, she lay in bed next to him.  He wrapped an arm over her protectively and pulled her towards him._

_"I dunno what I'd do without you pet," he whispered, his finger tips making a gentle trail up and down her arms._

_"You'd dream," she answered softly, her eyes remaining closed._

_He gave a small chuckle from the back of his throat and kissed her softly._

_"I dream of you when you're here, dreaming of you if you left wouldn't be hard."_

_She opened her eyes and gently pushed him back down on the pillow.  She placed a gentle hand across his eyes._

_"Close your eyes."_

He did as she said, smiling a little as he felt her move her hand away and give each closed eye lid a tender kiss.

"What do you see?" she asked, her lips moving to his earlobes.

_"Black.  It's dark, pet," he teased gently._

_She smiled as he opened his eyes._

_"Whenever you see the darkness, think of me."_

_He shook his head and kissed her.  "I don't need the darkness to think of you pet.  I think of you all the time."_

_She leant forward, kissing him once more, neither of the lovers coming up for air._

_She pulled back away from him slowly._

_"It'll be dark soon," she commented._

_He looked out the unwashed window of the crypt, confused._

_"It's already dark out there pet."_

_She shook her head and settled back into his arms._

_"Not where I am.  It's bright here.  Warm.  But I miss you.  Everyone.  It'll be dark for me soon," she whispered._

_"You're not afraid of the dark, are you?" he whispered, his voice teasing._

_"Should I be?" she countered._

_He kissed the top of her head gently._

_"Not with me here."_

_She smiled and rested on her elbow, gazing down at him, her hand lazily playing with his bleached blonde curls.._

_"You don't understand.  You are the dark."_

_He looked at her, his eyes asking questions that his mind couldn't process._

_"You're afraid of me?"_

_"I've never been afraid of the dark.  I miss it."_

_He smiled and took the hand that was fiddling with his hair._

_"If you don't leave then you won't ever have to miss it."_

_She shook her head and stood up, pulling the sheets from the bed around her, leaving him lying on his back, looking towards her._

_"You said you'd wait."_

_He sighed softly and closed his eyes._

_"I'll wait.  But seeing you…you make saying good-bye so much harder."_

_She nodded her agreement and bent down to kiss him once more before leaving._

_"It just means that saying hello is that much better."_

~*~

Giles sighed as he turned around the small sign on the glass door of the Magic Shop, advertising that they were once again open.  He hadn't wanted to open the shop so soon after Buffy's death, but he had no choice in the matter.

Life had to go on.

Anya stop behind the counter, trying to put on an enthusiastic smile, but wasn't able to muster the usual enthusiasm that she usually had.

Giles sat at the round table and pulled his glasses off.  He looked up as he heard the dinging of the bell, telling him someone had entered.

"Willow," he said softly.  He stood up and walked to her, hugging her quickly.

"Xander told me you were opening up again today.  I thought I'd just stop by and…see how things are."

Giles gave a small smile and sat back down.

"Things could be worse," he said sadly.

From her spot behind the counter, Anya muttered softly "don't know how."

Giles closed his eyes briefly, trying to ignore the ex-demons comment.

"How's Dawn?" Willow asked, trying to get Giles mind off his depression.

"She's coping.  Spike's been helping her a lot.  She's…she's getting there."

"She just needs time.  We all do," Willow said.  She put her hand over Giles' for a moment and stood up.

"If you need me, you know where I am."

"Of course."

"Give my love to Dawn."

Giles nodded and watched as the young witch walked out.

He looked towards Anya who was looking at he cash register in confusion.

"Something the matter?"

Anya looked up, surprised by his voice.

"Oh, uh…no.  No there's nothing wrong."

"You just seemed a little…out of it."

"Just thinking."

Giles nodded and walked past the counter and out the back.

The training room.  Tears came rushing back to his yes as he remembered the last conversation he had had with Buffy.  It had been in this room.

The punching bag was still lying dormant on the floor.  Giles couldn't bring himself to pick it back up and reattach it.  No one would need to use it ever again.

He walked to the other side of the room and sat on the couch, remembering what he and Buffy had been talking about the last time they had spoken.

_"If Dawn dies, I'm quitting."_

She had quit before, but Giles had known from her tone of voice that her departure would be permanent, no matter how much the Council begged for her back.  It wouldn't be the Council she was quitting, it would be the slaying.  She would stop, and there would be no Slayer until she died.

Giles stood up and walked out of the room, closing the door and locking it behind him, vowing to himself that no one would ever go in there again.  No one but _her._


	4. Chapter Three: William & Christian

CHAPTER THREE: WILLIAM & CHRISTIAN 

Court kicked open the doors to the mansion that had lain dormant since Angel had left town.  He breathed the air deeply, finding it musty, but ridden with the scent of blood and pain.

"This suits me well."

The minions who had shown this place knew that if they could breath, they would have been sighing with relief.

"Tomorrow, we will begin the process.  Tomorrow, everyone in this dismal town will know exactly who I am.  Tomorrow, everyone will tremble before me.  And tomorrow, everyone will fall on their knees and call me Master."

One minion, Christian who had been only fifteen when he had been turned, stepped forward.

"Uh…master?  What process?"

Court smiled, hoping that someone would step forward and ask.  He took a step towards the young vampire and quickly gave him an affectionate kiss on the forehead.

"The process of opening the hellmouth of course."

There was a shocked silence.  No one had tried to open the hellmouth for at least a year.

"I'll need as many sacrifices as you can find.  Yhidnamma will accept nothing less than the best.  They must be fresh.  No feeding, no killing.  Yhidnamanna will come when he is called, and he will be called when we have five.  Do you understand this?" Court asked, his eyes glaring at the minions who stood cowering before him.

Christian went to ask a question but quickly stopped himself.

"You have a question?" Court asked, directing his gaze at the younger vampire.

"How…how do we live if we have no food?"

Court laughed and ruffled the vamps hair.  "You will be provided for.  No harm will come to you.  Just bring me my sacrifices.  Until then, rest up.  Tomorrow will be a big day for you all."

The vamps went to leave, only one lingering behind.

"Christian, you seem to be full of questions."

Christian looked at Court with admiration.

"Sir, I want to be your right hand man."

Court looked at him for a moment, sizing him up.

"What have you done to deserve that responsibility?"

"I'll prove my worth to you.  I swear, I can do whatever you ask."

Court hesitated, stroking his chin thoughtfully.

"Very well then.  If you can bring to me the Key, I will make you my right hand man."  
"The key, Master?"

Court nodded.  "Glorificus knew of only one ritual to open the dimensions of the worlds.  It just so happens that Yhidnamanna will not only open the hellmouth, but every portal if we bring him the Key.  And you will bring her to me."

Christian nodded, grinning at the chance he was being given.

"I will not fail you."

"No," Court said.  "Because then I would be forced to kill you."

~*~

Buffy smiled as she watched what was happening on the earth below her.  Things were hard, she knew that the gang would take her death with great pain, but…they were living, just like she had bade Dawn to tell them.

Giles was…coping.  She had watched his torment, his frustration, his anger, his tears.  She had watched the phone call he had made to the council telling them that she was dead.  She had watched him throw the telephone at the wall when he had hung up.  She had watched him fall to his knees, his body wracking with sobs, and she had watched as he had fallen asleep on the floor, his last thoughts had been on her.

The gang was patrolling, Xander wanting to take over a lot of it.  He had no formal training, the council had pointed that out to him before, along with Cordelia and Anya, again and again, but he had 'clocked field time', and his pain was helping him to fight.

Dawn…it hurt to watch Dawn.  She was becoming quieter than she had been after Joyce had died.  Though, Buffy thought that it would be fairly normal, given the circumstances.  Even if Dawn hadn't been the Key, she still would have taken it badly. Giles was looking after her though, and Buffy had first hand experience that Giles would staunchly protect her against anything and everything.

And Spike…Spike was keeping his promise to protect Dawn to the end of the world.  Somehow, Buffy knew she had made the right decision with entrusting his sister's life to him, no matter how monstrous he thought he was.  To Buffy, he was a man.

The fact that he was soulless and still completely protective made him all the more trustworthy.  Spike wouldn't and couldn't turn on Dawn, even if he came to his sense, or if the chip was removed.

Buffy smiled softly and continued watching their lives, not noticing that someone had come up behind her.  That someone was a young man, no older than twenty-one.  He coughed softly, letting her know that he was there.

She turned and looked at him.  She recognised him, but she wasn't sure where she knew him from.

"Hi Buffy."

Buffy took a step back, her heart catching in her throat.

"What – what are you doing here?  I don't understand."

He smiled slightly and gave a small shrug.

"I'm not who you think I am.  Not really."

"Then who are you?  You look and talk a lot like Spike," she said.  "Except, you know, you have brown hair, and you're lacking in the leather."

He smiled at her description and went to stand next to her.

"I'm not Spike.  Well, I am, but…I'm not the vampire.  You're here, but you're body is buried.  I'm here, but my body walks the earth.  Understand?"

"You're Spike's soul?" she asked slowly, trying to take what he was telling her in.

"William's soul, and yes.  And if Angelus was roaming the earth, then Angel's soul would be here as well."

Buffy stared at him for a moment before continuing.  "What happens when I dust vampires then?  I mean…when I used to dust vampires?  I thought they'd go to hell or something."

"Well, the human, the person, depending on what the did in life, they would either come here, to this realm, or if they had committed acts of unspeakable evil, they would go to hell.  But, when a person dies by a vampire bite, they physically die.  Their soul is brought here.  Their body remains on earth."

Buffy nodded, beginning to understand.  She had never thought about what happened to a person once they had died.  Being brought to this realm of safety, peace and love had been a great relief to her.  She had been unsure about the afterlife, and this realm had treated her kindly so far.  

She had always assumed that when a person was turned that…well, admittedly she had never questioned what happened.  When Angel had lost his soul, it made her wonder where the soul had gone if it was lost, but, she had never thought that the souls of the vampires she had been dusting had been in heaven all along.

"Isn't it hard having to watch yourself do all that?" she asked.

"I hate watching anything evil, but that's not me.  I have no control over him, and he has no control over me.  He thinks of me a lot.  Especially lately.  He thinks of what might have been.  He thinks that maybe if he had his soul back, like Angel has his soul, then you might be able to love him.  The amazing thing is, you learned to love him without me being there."

Buffy went to protest, to tell him he was wrong.

"I know you have feelings for him, pet," William said softly.

Her heart leapt at the familiar endearment, her smile spreading across her face.

"He thinks he's a monster, but he's not.  Not completely.  Not the part that counts.  He didn't need me to bring out the man in him.  He had you."

Buffy closed her eyes, wishing that this realm would stop reminding her of all that she had missed out on by not accepting the love that was offered to her again and again.  Instead, she had pushed it away, telling him that he was incapable of feeling, incapable of loving.  But he had proved his love, had proved his worth, and now it was too late.

~*~

For the first time in a week, Spike was patrolling beside Xander, rather than lurking in the bushes.

"Kinda slow tonight, eh?" he asked casually.

Xander glared at him, wondering how he had been convinced to let Spike come with him on a hunt.

Rolling his eyes, Xander realised that he could either stay quiet and make the evening dull, or he could reply and possibly liven up the night with the bantering that always took place.

"What gives you that impression?" he asked bitterly.  "The fact that there's no vampires around, or the fact that the only vampire around here is you."

Spike looked at him and raised his eyebrows.  He shrugged and continued walking.

"What, no comeback?" Xander asked.

Spike turned to look at him.  "You state the truth, I'm not about to answer you back."

Xander shook his head, confused.  "I always state the truth and you always have some smart-alec comment to throw back in my face."

Spike gave a slight grin and kept walking.

"So, that's it?  You're just gonna keep walking?"

"Why not?" Spike answered as he continued on.  "My not answering is pissing you off more than my answers usually do.  Why stop the fun now?"

Xander ran a few steps to catch up with the blonde vampire.  Without warning, he fell to the ground.  Spike stopped and looked around him confused.  He hadn't smelt any attacker near to them, and he couldn't see anywhere there either.

He looked down at Xander, lying on the ground, moaning in pain, clutching at his head.

Spike put out a reluctant hand to help him up. Xander hesitated before accepting the hand and was pulled to his feet.

"What _was that?" he asked, rubbing his head._

"Buggered if I know mate.  One moment you're running, the next…you're moaning worse than usual."

Xander looked around him, trying to see what had knocked him down.

"I didn't see anyone."

Without any warning, Spike felt someone kick the back of his head.  He managed to stay balanced and looked up to see a young boy, about nine years of age, swinging in a tree.

"You shouldn't be out here after dark," Xander said as the boy dropped down to the ground.  "There's scary stuff around here at night."

The boy shrugged and Spike immediately knew something was awry.  He listened carefully and heard no heart beat besides Xander's.

He lunged towards the boy and caught his neck, throwing him against the tree he had just swung from.

"Who sent you?" he cried angrily.

The boy pushed Spike away, surprising both Spike and Xander with his strength.

Spike regained his balance and quickly picked up the boy-vamp, obviously a fledging, and threw him against the tree once more, aiming him directly to a broken branch.

The boy turned to dust and Spike watched as the dust particles settled at his feet.

"They're getting cockier.  They're turning littluns now."

Xander stepped forward and looked down at the dust.  He spat on it quickly and walked away.

"Without the Slayer here, they're bound to get cocky," he replied.

Spike went to follow but stopped suddenly.

"He wasn't alone," he said.

Xander stopped and looked towards the vampire.

"How do you know?"

Spike held up a hand, signalling for Xander to be quiet.

"Listen," he whispered.

Xander listened carefully but still heard nothing.  Suddenly, he felt something fall against him, bringing him crashing to the ground once more.

"William the Bloody dusting his own kind," said a young vamp.  He looked to be fifteen.  Another youngun.  "Gotta say, I'm kinda disappointed.  You were a hero of mine once."

"And who might you be?"

The vamp smirked and stepped off Xander who had been knocked out by the blow to the head and the consequent collapse to the ground.

"I'm hurt Spike.  Forgotten me already?" he asked.

Spike glared at the boy-vamp, wondering how he knew him.  It suddenly clicked.

"Christian."

The boy-vamp smirked again and gave a bitter smile.

"Good to see you remember. Not that it will matter.  In a few days, you'll be wishing that you had have left this town for good a long time ago.  You're gonna die William, you and everyone you care about."

Spike glared at him, advancing forward with a stake that he pulled from his coat pocket.

"Oh wait…that's already happened hasn't it?" Christian jibed, knowing how to grate on the vampires nerves.

Christian pushed Spike to the ground, Spike tumbling over Xander.

"I'll see you in a few."

~*~

"Seems we've got ourselves a new bad-ass about the town," Spike announced, opening the door to Giles' apartment and strolling in comfortably.

The Scooby Gang looked up at him, surprised to see him supporting Xander as he tried to walk.

"Xander," Anya cried, rushing towards him.  She freed him from Spike's hands, gave a grateful smile to the vampire and helped her fiancée to a chair.

"What happened?" Giles asked.

"Vampires, two of em.  Younguns.  Dusted one.  The other, name of Christian.  He got away," Spike summed up quickly.

"Uh, do you mean young in our time or in yours?" Willow asked, looking up from her seat on Tara's lap.

"Both," he replied.

"Dusted vamp was no more than ten.  Other one was about fifteen.  I can guarantee that he's a fully trained fledgling."

"Fledgling?" Willow repeated.

"Young vamps.  If a vamp sires someone, that's the fledgling.  The vamp will train them, teach them," Spike explained.

Willow nodded and stood up, walking over to Xander.

There was a cut on his head, still bleeding, but not as profusely as it had been.

She put a hand over it, ignoring Xander as he flinched away.

The group watched as Willow muttered something underneath her breath.  They watched as Xander's wound stopped bleeding and, when Willow took her hand away, the wound was gone.

Giles looked at her surprised.

"Where did you learn that?" 

Willow smiled and retook her place on Tara's lap.

"Just something I picked up when I was looking for a way to help Tara."

Tara smiled and took Willow's hand.

"Why is it, then," Anya started, "that you can heal Xander, but you can't de-rat Amy?"

Willow looked up, shocked.  She smiled sheepishly.  "I'd kinda forgotten about her.  What with everything that happened."

"Perhaps you may want to de-rat her Willow," Giles suggested.  "We could use all the help we can get right now."

Spike nodded in agreement.  "That Christian bloke wasn't out there for eats.  He was targeting us for something.  That was no random attack."

Giles took off his glasses, polishing them on his white handkerchief.

"We'll have to work out what's going on then.  If there's something going on, we're going to have to stop it."

Not for the first time that week, the Scooby Gang began to cast their thoughts to a time when taking down the evil of town hadn't been so complicated.

Spike looked around awkwardly and watched as Dawn closed the book that she had been enthralled in, stood up and walked over to him.

"Walk me home?" she asked in no more than a whisper.

"Dawn, we'll be going home in an hour if you want to wait," Xander said, standing up and moving over to her.

Dawn shook her head, thankful that they would be going home soon, but she needed to be at the house by herself for a while.

"It's alright.  I can handle being there by myself," she said.

Giles looked up and caught Spike's eyes.  Spike nodded, silently promising that he wouldn't leave Dawn at the house by herself.

"We'll see you in an hour then," Giles said, knowing that Dawn could be just like her sister in that she hated to be pushed.  Time and space was what she needed, and who was he to refuse her of that?

Spike gave a small farewell smile to the group.  With that, he took Dawn by the hand and walked out the door in the darkness.

~*~

Dawn unlocked the door and walked in, holding it open for Spike to enter. He gave a small smile and walked in after her.

"You want anything?" Dawn offered.  "Food, drink?"

Spike shook his head and sat comfortably on the stairwell.

"So…you got big plans for tonight?" Dawn asked, trying to make conversation with the man she had come to regard as an older brother of sorts.  A much, much older, deader brother of sorts.

"Gonna do another sweep.  See what I can find out about this Christian bloke."

Dawn nodded and sat beside him.  With only a moments hesitation, she rested her head on his shoulder.

Spike was taken aback for a moment, but shifted his position to put his arm around her, bringing her closer.  Carefully, he wiped a tear from her eyes and kissed the top of her head.

"I miss her, Spike.  I miss her so much," she sobbed, breaking down into tears that she had been holding back for days.

He rocked her gently back and forth, holding her tightly, wishing he could do something to ease the young girls pain, wishing he could do something to ease his own.

________________________

From the outside of the Summers' house, a young boy-vamp stood, peering in through the windows, watching in disgust as the blonde vamp cradled the young girl in his arms.

The Key.

Everyone knew who the girl was.  As the sister to the Slayer, she had been someone much sought after.  Many vamps had planned to kidnap the Key, hoping that the Slayer would swap herself for her sister.  

It was only a few days ago that word had spread of the importance of the young girl named Dawn.

Christian looked away, repulsed by what he had seen his sire doing.  He was acting…he was acting human.

He walked away from the front porch and round towards the back, finding a comfortable spot in the tree that the Slayer had used to climb in and out of her room without being seen or heard.

He would wait until the blonde vamp left and then make his move.

________________________

Spike looked up as he heard the front door open.  He saw Xander and Anya walk through, hand-in-hand.  Dawn had fallen asleep about twenty minutes ago and he had quietly taken her up stairs to her own room.

"Where's Dawn?" Xander asked quietly.

Spike pointed upwards.  "Poor thing, fell asleep.  Not the happiest thing on earth right now."

Xander gave a small nod and looked towards the vampire and who had stood up.

"I'll see you all tomorrow.  Take care of 'er."

Anya smiled.  She hesitated for a second and stepped forward, dropping Xander's hand.

"Thank you," she whispered, quickly kissing Spike's cheek.

Spike looked at her, confused.  

Anya looked back towards Xander.

"Isn't that what we're meant to do?"

Spike gave a small laugh and walked out the door, oblivious to the pair of eyes that watched him from a branch in a tree that towered above the Summers' residence.

________________________

Dawn woke up with a start.  She wasn't sure what had woken her at first, but as she began to wake up properly, she could remember the recurring dream that had plagued her thoughts since Buffy had died.

She stood up, wiping fresh tears from her eyes and walked out of her room.  She wandered past the guest room, its door wide open, showing her that Xander and Anya were at home as well.  

She peeked inside what had been her mother's old room and saw Giles laying there asleep.

She walked down the stairs towards the kitchen, hoping that a drink would calm her down, possibly even help her to sleep.  She looked at the clock on the microwave, its bright red luminous lights telling her it was a little after two in the morning.

She sighed and pulled out a small bottle of orange juice, opened it and poured a glass for herself.  She replaced the bottle back in the fridge and took a seat at the counter.

Restlessly, she stood up again and walked over to the door, staring out into the black night.

She opened it, leaving the door open wide, making sure that if it closed it wouldn't lock her out.  

She took a seat on the back porch, sipping her juice, wondering how Buffy could stand being alone in the dark, night after night for five years.

She closed her eyes and leant against the railing.  

She jumped startled as she opened her eyes to find a boy standing in front of her.  He looked to be no older than fifteen.

"W-what are you doing here?" she asked, standing up, instinctively moving backwards.

"I'm sorry I startled you," he said politely.

She looked at him and saw that his clothes had rips in them, his feet were shoeless and muddy.

"Can I have some?" he asked, pointing to her glass of juice.

Dawn looked down and gave him the glass.

He smiled and drank it heartily, almost as though he hadn't drank a thing in weeks.

"Thank you." 

Dawn nodded and gave him a small smile.

"A-are you from around here?" she asked.

He nodded and looked down.  "Down the road a bit.  I was walking.  I saw the light turn on in the kitchen.  I…I was hoping it would be you."

"Why me?" she asked.

He shrugged a little.  "You look nice.  You looked like maybe…maybe you would give me something to eat."

Dawn felt her heart sink.  The boy in front of her was homeless and starving.  She may have been having a crappy life lately, but having nowhere to go to at night would have been worse. 

"I was sorry to hear about your sister," the young boy said softly.

She looked at him, startled.  "How do you know about my family?"

"Everyone knows about your family.  Small town.  News spreads," he explained.  "We all heard about your big sis'.  And about you're mom."

"Where are your family?" Dawn asked quietly.  

The boy shrugged and put his hands into pockets that Dawn suspected were covered in filth.

"My dad's alive.  He's…he's not what he used to be.  He…he changed when mom left."

Dawn looked at him with sympathy and finally looked away.

"Wait here, I'll get you something to eat."

The boy looked at her gratefully.

"Could…could I come inside?  It's kinda cold out here."

Dawn nodded and stepped inside, waiting for the boy to enter.

~*~

Dawn looked at him, giving him a 'what are you waiting for' look.

He grinned sheepishly and took a step towards the door.  "Thanks."

She turned her back to him and went towards the refrigerator once again.  She removed some ham and quickly made a sandwich for the boy, putting it on a plate for him.

She turned and saw him standing outside still, very close to the entrance.

"What's wrong?" she asked.  She handed the plate to him and he took it from her, sinking his teeth into the sandwich hungrily.

"Didn't feel comfortable going in after all," he explained.

"Well, maybe if you weren't a vampire, you coulda just waltzed in," a voice from the stairs said.

The boy turned and saw Spike standing there, his game face on.  Dawn took an unconscious step backwards.  She wouldn't have recognised him if it hadn't have been for his cocky accent.

"Stay inside lil' bit," Spike growled.

Dawn nodded and moved further from the door, almost afraid that the boy would walk in, invited or not.  She made a quick mental note to not say anything until the boy was completely gone, lest she accidentally invite him in as she did with Harmony so many months ago.

"Something you wanted boy?" Spike asked, stepping forward and grabbing hold of the younger vamps collar.  

Spike threw him mercilessly down the stairs, grabbing hold of the porcelain plate that Christian still held before making the boy-vamp become air-born.

Christian spat out a mouthful of blood and glared at Spike.

"Why do you protect her Spike?  You used to be one of us.  You used to be the best.  Don't you even remember who you are?" Christian yelled.  "You're Spike for hell's sake!  Spike, the Big Bad.  Spike the vamp who got his nickname by beating people to death with railroad spikes!"

Spike mentally winced at the jibe, hoping that Dawn would understand that he wasn't anything like the old Spike.  No matter how much he pretended to still be the Big Bad, he didn't have it in him to do any of the things that had once been done only for the fun of it.

"You were my sire you bastard!  You were everything!  You taught me everything!  And now…look at you!  You're pathetic," Christian spat out.

Spike glared at him, advancing towards him once more.  He quickly delivered a powerful backhand to the boy's face.

"He can de-chip you, you know.  You could be powerful again," Christian said calmly.

Spike looked at his fledgling and raised his eyebrows.

"He?"

"Yhidnamanna," Christian replied.  "He could do it.  If you came back to us, he could do it."

Spike gave a low growl and backhanded his fledgling once more.

"Get out of here.  Stay away from me, stay away from here.  And if you know what's good for you, stay away from whoever you're following.  He'll most likely kill you in a second."

Christian went to walk away but stopped.

"Sad fact: I'd rather be killed by Court than see you here.  Consorting with the enemy.  You're pitiable man.  You've got nothing left."

With that the boy-vamp walked away.

Spike closed his eyes, trying to catch his breath.  He went to turn back to Dawn, but quickly de-vamped.  He looked up at her, standing in the kitchen, frightened as anything.

He took tentative steps towards her, keeping complete eye-contact with her.

She took a step away from him as he entered the house, and automatically Spike stopped where he was.

Spike knew that if his heart could still beat, it would have skipped about four beats and sunk down into the pits of his stomach.

Spike looked towards Dawn, letting her make the first move, afraid to scare her away. 

For what seemed like hours, they stood staring at one another in what seemed to be a checkmate.  Finally Dawn stepped forward, collapsing into Spike's arms, choking on her sobs.

Somehow they both knew that the coming weeks would be extremely long without the Slayer.

~*~

William stood beside Buffy, holding her hand gently.  It wasn't the hand holding of lovers, only of confidantes, of two souls trying to make sense of the world in which neither one had any part of.

"It's kind of nice having part of you live on long after you're dead," William said, after a long silence.  

Buffy looked at him, silently asking him to explain to her what he meant, though part of her already knew the answer.

"When I died…I hate to sound pitiful, but I was pathetic."

Buffy gave a small smile, remembering the condensed version of what Spike had told her in the Bronze of his past life and how he was turned.

"Now…there's confidence, and warmth, and family.  And love.  I feel what he feels, even though I don't want to feel some of it.  What he felt for Drusilla…it was real, I don't doubt that.  But it was pity, concern.  He hated being with her when she was weak, even though he would always take care of her.  'til the end of the world," William said.

"But he didn't."

"She didn't want it.  She didn't want him.  She wanted all of the demon in her man.  And Spike didn't have that.  Angelus did. I think part of me was still with him.  I don't really understand him properly.  All I know is, I see what he sees, I feel what he feels.  The enormity of it.  The power of it.  He's…he's strong but he'd break in a second if he left himself open to it."

Buffy watched on in silence, sighing softly at everything that was happening.  She didn't want to go back, but it hurt her to watch those that she loved mourn over her death.

"Out of all the people on this world to trust…I chose him.  And I still don't know why," Buffy admitted amidst the silence.

"Do you want an actual answer, or just a sympathetic shrug?" William asked, grinning a little.

She glared at him a little, happy that he reminded her so much of the Spike that she had grown to…care for.

"The former."

"You trusted him, but…you were testing him a little.  You needed to know if it was for real or not."

Buffy sighed, hating that she was so transparent.

"How come you know so much?"

"I know it because he knows it, luv."

~*~

_"You haven't given up on me yet, have you?" she asked, her hand moving to the back of his neck._

_He shook his head and leant forward to kiss her. _

_"I told you I'd wait forever if I had to.  You should know that I mean that.  I don't make promises I can't keep."_

_She smiled and took his hand, holding her hand palm-to-palm with his._

_"For someone who's hands are half the size of mine, you know how to use them," he whispered._

_She smiled and raised her eyebrows a little._

_"For defending yourself, I mean.  From demons."_

_"I don't defend myself.  I protect the others.  I didn't do what I did for me.  I did it for them.  For everyone."_

_"I know you did luv.  But there was someone you weren't thinking of," he whispered._

_"I know I hurt you."_

_He looked away from her, tears in his eyes._

_"You tore my heart and battered my soul.  Every part of me was alive because you made it that way.  I can't even feel anything anymore. I'm…numb."_

_"I'm sorry," she whispered._

_He sighed and ran his hand across her cheek softly._

_"What am I waiting for kitten?  Just tell me.  I need to know."_

_She smiled and placed her hand over his, pressing her cheek further into his touch._

_"You'll find out.  It's not much longer.  If you wait for me, you'll see."_

He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her against him tightly.

_"All you can do now is wait.  And help the others.  They need you," she said._

_"They don't need me.  They need you.  Everyone does.  Dawn.  Giles.  Me."_

_"I know," she whispered.  "It's too early.  Please don't leave without me."_

_"I won't.  I'm not like the others, I swear.  I would never leave you."_


	5. Chapter Four: Deratification

CHAPTER FOUR: DE-RAT-IFICATION 

Giles entered into the magic shop slowly, hating having to be at work when he should be taking care of Dawn.

He closed the door gently behind him and flicked a light on, almost jumping as he saw a figure sitting at the round table, reading.

"How can you read in that light?" Giles asked.

Spike turned around and Giles could see that Spike had his vamp eyes, yellow and glowing.

"Ah," he said, his question answered.

Spike looked back down at the books in front of him.

"I suppose I should have asked this first.  What are you doing here?" Giles asked.  He took a seat next to the vampire and looked at the books in front of him.

"Research," Spike answered simply, writing down another page number on a pad of paper.

"Yhidnamanna?" Giles asked, reading off the paper.

"Demon type," Spike replied.  "Not too nice a guy.  Powerful.  More powerful than the Master some say."

"More powerful than-" Giles stopped.  "Dear God."

Spike nodded and pushed one of the books in front of Giles.

"Here," Spike said, pointing to a particular paragraph.

"Yhidnamanna will come when he is called, and he will be called when there are five," Giles read.  "Five what?"

Spike glanced up at him, silently telling him the obvious answer.  "Sacrifices.  Human."

"He will open the mouth of hell and destroy everything on the earth," Giles continued.

"There's more," Spike said.

Giles looked down and continued reading.

"Yhidnamanna accepts only pure sacrifices.  If one sacrifice is the Key-" Giles stopped.

"Yhidnamanna will open every demon dimension there is," Spike finished.

Giles looked up and put the book down.

"Dawn-"

"She's safe.  It's daytime.  Vamps don't like to come and play in the sun."

Giles calmed down for a moment.

After a few moments of silence, Spike finally spoke up.

"They know who the Key is.  They know it's Dawn."

"How do they know that?  How do you know that?"

"Everyone knows.  After Glory carked it, everyone who's anyone found out that the Slayer's sister was the Key.  And I know that because they've already tried gettin' 'er."

"What?  When?"

"Last night.  Woulda been 'bout two in the mornin'.  Found the youngun, Christian lurking outside the house with her.  Dunno what the hell she was doing out there with 'im, but he knows who she is.  Tried to get an invite inside an' all," Spike said.

"She didn't-"

"No," Spike said reassuringly.  "He musta asked, but I think she nodded.  You hafta have a verbal invite to enter anywhere these days.  Or a written one.  I showed up just in time.  He's a nasty critter, Christian."

"You know him?" Giles asked.

Spike looked away.

"Could say that," he replied quietly.

Giles looked at the vamp for a moment before registering what he meant.  "Oh."

"He's trained.  He's trained like you wouldn't believe.  My first fledgling.  Wanted to teach 'im everything there is to know.  Stupid move," Spike said softly.

Giles stood up and moved away from the vampire.

"He's working for someone.  Court.  I've only met him once.  Wouldn't care to meet him again," Spike said.

"Court?  Do you mean Court Sams?" Giles asked.

"One and only.  Bastard of a bloke.  Kills anyone who threatens his reign of terror.  My guess is that young Christian will be doing anything to gain favour with 'im.  Fool'd do anything for a bit of power," Spike explained.

"If Court Sams is in town trying to call up Yhidnamanna then we're-"

"In a helluva a lot of trouble, I know, believe me.  From the looks of things, Court's got himself a few vamps, trying to round up some sacrifices.  Good news is, no one will be feeding."

"No feeding?" Giles repeated.

"Yhidnamanna accepts only pure sacrifices.  Nothing with tainted blood.  Meaning no snacks for the vamps.  It also means we've got a fightin' chance of not letting them all die if we find out where they're holed up."

"But how?"

Spike rubbed the back of his neck thoughtfully for a moment.

"Honestly, I got no clue.  None of my boys are loyal and Christian wouldn't tell me unless…" Spike trailed off.

"Unless what?"

"Unless he thought that I was one of them."

~*~

A silence had descended upon the Scooby Gang, each of them looking at the floor or the inside of their eyelids.  Giles had his head bowed down and even Anya looked uncomfortable.

"So let me get this straight," Xander said after a few moments.  "This Yamaha guy wants five live and kicking sacrifices and then he'll open the hellmouth.  And if he gets his hands on the Key, he'll open the demon dimensions as well."

"Yhidnamanna, and yes," Giles confirmed.

Xander nodded, hay with the explanation. 

"What does he do with them?" Dawn whispered.

Spike looked up at her and saw the fear in her eyes.  He moved to stand behind her chair, placing a comforting hand on one shoulder.  

Giles stumbled over his words for a few minutes, wanting to protect the young girl who had gone through so much in the last six months.  Finding out that you're not real, that you're a Key that will do inherent evil, and having your mother and sister die would have been…traumatic, Giles thought.

"It doesn't really say," Giles said quietly.

Dawn looked towards Spike for confirmation.  

"Yhidnamanna won't kill the sacrifices and he won't kill the Key.  Once they've got their sacrifices, Court will call on the demon who will come and inspect the people they've picked.  The five have to be pure, no vampire can have fed on them.  Once he inspects them, he…he takes them back to his demon dimension.  No one's too sure what happens after that," Spike said.

"How do you know all this anyway?" Anya asked.

Spike looked up at her sharply, hoping that no one would have asked him that question.

Spike looked away and took a seat beside Dawn.

"'Bout two years ago now, when Angelus was back in town, he wanted to call on Yhidnamanna.  He told us all about it and we were gonna go and start getting the sacrifices.  The plan got stopped when he got wind of Acathla being found," Spike said.

Willow looked up suddenly.  "What's in it for the vamp who calls Yhidnamanna?  There must be some sort of perk besides having the hellmouth opened."

Spike nodded calmly.  "Yhidnamanna's powerful.  Could do anything with the snap of his fingers.  Some say he's more powerful than some of the gods.  The uh, the vamp who calls Yhidnamanna gets turned into a demon."

"But vampires are demons," Dawn said in confusion.

"Hybrids," Anya offered.  "Yhidnamanna turns them into a demon in pure form.  The mayor all over again."

"You mean we're gonna have to deal with that snake thing again?" Xander asked.

Anya shook her head, trying to find the words to explain it.  "There's a lot of types of demons.  Some of them, thankfully aren't as big as what the mayor turned into.  Others are smaller, but a lot more powerful.  Court…Court will go for something smaller and more powerful."

"How do you know what Court will go for?" Spike asked.

Anya looked at him and shrugged a little.  "You're not the only one who's met Court."

Spike raised his eyebrows at her and grinned a little as she turned away.

"Maybe my earlier plan just got a little bit better," Spike said to Giles.

Giles looked at the vamp suspiciously.

"What do you propose?"

"I try and get the info outta Christian.  Anya tries to get it out of Court," Spike said simply.

Giles looked towards Anya who looked horrified at the notion.

"How well did you know Court?" Giles asked.

Anya looked at him pointedly.  "We were fairly well acquainted.  In the 1400's, he and I were causing some havoc in Nepal.  We lost touch in the 1600's, mainly due to me wanting to live somewhere a little sunnier."

Giles removed his glasses and polished them absentmindedly.

"Would you be willing to talk to Court?  Try and find out when he plans to do this. Find out what he wants from Yhidnamanna.  Spike, if you can integrate yourself into their group, you could be most helpful to us.  It would mean you could stop Yhidnamanna from being called at all."

Spike nodded and looked towards Anya.  "How bout you An?  Up for a challenge?"

Anya hesitated but eventually nodded her consent. 

"Well, I suggest that we start doing things fairly soon.  Tonight if possible," Giles suggested.

"What about the rest of us?" Willow asked.

"You could start with de-ratting Amy.  Then if Amy's willing to help, she, you and Tara could try and research a few different protection spells," Giles suggested.

Willow nodded and looked towards Tara who just smiled.

"What about me?  What can I do?" Dawn asked.

"Stay with Xander.  Make sure you're not out alone, I don't care if the suns still out or not.  Do not, under any circumstances invite anyone in.  That goes for you as well Xander," Giles warned.  "I'd suggest that we start heading home before sundown.  We'll meet back here in the morning and…discuss things a little more."

Everyone nodded and began standing up.  Dawn grabbed hold of Spike's hand, stopping him from heading out the door.

"How are you going to get Christian to believe you?  After last night…he'd never believe that you were on their side," Dawn said.

"I've got a plan Nibblet, don't worry.  He'll believe me.  It'll take time, but I'll gain his trust," Spike said, pulling the small girl into his arms.

"Now, get home before dark.  I'll see you in the morning."

Dawn nodded and gave him one last quick hug before looking towards Xander.

"I just hope this works," Spike said to Giles before grabbing a blanket to cover himself from the sun.

"If it doesn't work, then we'll all be dead."

~*~

Spike wandered through the graveyard, hands in his pockets.  He forced himself to keep walking as he passed _his Slayer's grave.  He was here for a purpose, and no matter how much he wanted to stop and weep for the woman he loved, he had to keep going._

He saw a bump in the ground where Xander had fallen the night before.  It wouldn't be like his fledgling to be hiding in the same area, but he had been out of the game for a few years.

Spike looked up into the tree, somehow not entirely surprised to see two glowing eyes staring back at him.

"You want it, don't you?" came a deep voice from behind him.  Spike spun around to see a taller vampire who he recognised as Court.

Spike didn't reply, he only watched as Christian dislodged himself from the tree and stood beside Court.

"I told you he'd come," the boy-vamp said smugly.

"What can I say, I'm predictable," Spike replied, shrugging casually.

"Maybe I just know you," Christian replied.

"Quiet!  Both of you," Court spat.

Spike looked at him coldly, wondering why Christian would be hanging about with someone who was trying to obtain powers that he had no rights to claim.

"William the bloody, it would be an honour to have you with us," Court said.

"I'm only with you to get this cute li'l chip out of my head, you got that? I'm not having anythin' to do with your sacrifices."

"Not like you can hunt anyway," Christian said bitterly.

Court threw the boy-vamp a hard glance and the boy immediately looked down at the ground.

"You'll get the chip out, not to worry.  Yhidnamanna can do all of that and then some.  Soon enough, I should be able to do that as well," Court said.

"Count me in then," Spike said grimly.  "This whole being helpless as a kitten stuck up a tree really isn't to my fancy.  The sooner this things out, the better, I say."

"You're welcome to join us.  All we ask is one thing," Court said.

"What's that?"

"You show you're loyalty to us."

Spike felt his heart sink.  He knew what they were going to ask.

"You will bring us the Key."

~*~

"Houston, we have a problem," Spike said, flinging open the doors to Giles' shop.

Giles looked up sharply, surprised by how frazzled the blonde vampire seemed.

"What is it?"

Spike began pacing up and down the length of the lower area of the store until Giles caught his arm and pushed him towards a chair.

"I'm in on proviso," Spike said, running a hand through his hair.

"Proviso?" Xander repeated, emerging from the small area behind the counter.

"I bring them what they want, I'm in."

"Good lord," Giles gasped.  "They want-"

"The Key.  I'm in if I bring them the Key.  No bloody way.  They've got a snowballs chance in hell of me bringing them the Key.  And the Nibblet is not gonna know about them wanting her, you got that?" Spike said, crossing his arms over his chest.

Giles removed his glasses and polished them swiftly, his tactic whenever he became frazzled.  He nodded, answering the vampires question.  He didn't want to involve Dawn in this anymore than Spike did.

"There's gotta be some other way," Xander said.

"Like what?" Spike asked testily.  He stood up and resumed his pacing again.

He stopped mid stride.

"Where is our favourite door-opener?" 

"She's with Tara and Willow," Xander offered.  "They're at Buf…they're at Dawn's.  Watching video's."

Spike nodded, his unbeating heart constricting at the almost mention of Buffy's name.

"And demon girl?  Where's she at?"

"Demon girl, has a name," Xander said angrily.  "[I]_Anya[/I] is out looking for your guy. I don't see why she let you push her into this."_

"Push her?  I didn't exactly see her complaining before.  Maybe you're just a wee bit insecure.  Afraid that she may have the hots for an ex-honey?" Spike taunted.

Xander was at Spike's throat within seconds.

"He meant nothing to her, do you get that?  Nothing."

"Xander, stop it," Giles exclaimed.  "He's just stirring."  
Xander glared at the neutered vampire and took a step back, hating that he could still play on Xander's weaknesses so easily.

"Maybe someone should have gone with her," Giles said softly.

"Like who?  The whelp?" Spike asked scornfully.

"Like Willow.  Or perhaps Tara.  If Anya were to get into trouble, help of the supernatural kind would be most welcome," Giles said.

"I'm sure she can hold her own," Spike said.  

Xander fiddled with his hands nervously.

"What's taking her so long anyway?  I thought she was gonna be back sooner."

"If she's out looking for Court, she shoulda just come with me.  Ran in to him bout half an hour ago."

"What?" Giles exclaimed.  "And you only just thought to tell us this now?"

Spike shrugged and sat back on his seat, his feet resting on the round table.

"Maybe she's only just run in to him.  I mean, it may take her a while to get the information out of him.  She's fine.  She's just fine," Xander said, trailing off a little.

~*~

Anya strolled through the cemetery, armed with a cross and a make-shift stake that Giles had given to her, in case any vampire apart from Court saw her.

She couldn't understand how Buffy could do this for five years on end and not get a severe case of the willies every night.  She shivered in the cool night air, hoping that she would see Court and soon.  She hated being out here, and as much as she wanted to see her old friend, she would have been happier at home with Xander, in their apartment, in their bed.

She turned sharply as she heard leaves rustling.

"It's just the wind," she told herself softly.

She turned back and yelped in surprise.

The vampire looked at her, startled.

"Anyanka?"

Anya smiled, thankful that he had remembered her.  Otherwise, she would probably have been this vampire's midnight snack.

"Hello Court," she said softly.

Court looked her up and down, a smile showing on his face.

"What are you doing here?  The last time I saw you was-"

"Nepal.  In the 1600's.  I remember."

"Wow…look at you.  You haven't changed a bit," he said.

"Nor have you.  Immortality's a wonderful thing," she said.

Giles had instructed her to make it seem as though she was still a demon, rather than a human being.  

"Wow…how are you?  How's the vengeances coming along lately?" he asked.

"Oh, you know," Anya said vaguely.  "Just doing some wishes, making new alternate realities.  The basics."

Well, it was the truth.  She had granted Cordelia a wish, though that had been two years ago.  Ironic how the last wish she had made was to take revenge on the man she was now engaged to.

"How's eating people working out for you?" Anya asked bluntly.

Court gave a small grin.  "Same ole, same ole.  Sunnydale's the perfect place for it.  No one really seems to question it.  People are too afraid to face up to the reality of it all.  Gotta love this town."

Anya gave a tight smile, wondering how she could ask him why he was summoning Yhidnamanna in a semi-tactful way.

"I heard you were in town," Anya said casually.

"I see my reputation precedes me.  Heard it from who?"

"Oh, just some demon connections I have.  They seem to be pretty impressed by what you're doing.  Calling in the big guns and all," Anya said.

"You know about calling the demon Yhidnamanna?" Court asked.

Anya nodded enthusiastically.  "It's all around town.  I haven't seen anyone get this excited since the Ascension."

Court scoffed. "The mayor was a fool.  He became a mortal demon, rather than an immortal one.  He makes himself impervious to harm, but lets himself be killed in the first ten minutes.  Sloppy work."

"Why become a demon when you already are one Court?" Anya asked.

He gave a small smile.  "You're exactly how I remember you Anyanka.  Always asking why and wherefore when it came to me gaining power."

"Well, you know…I hated you having more than me," Anya admitted.

"I call on Yhidnamanna, and he grants me my deepest desire.  He'll give me powers that I've never even thought of.  That you've never held.  He'll make me immortal, unkillable, unstoppable.  I could finally go with you into your sunnier place," he said.

"What demon is unkillable?  Even I can be killed," truthful on many levels, Anya thought.

"Korickana.  Demon in human form.  Feeds from humans, like vampires.  Walks in the human world.  Needs nothing but another's life-flow to sustain life.  Completely resistant to harm," Court explained, a slight tinge of longing in his voice.

"And I shall have it.  Yhidnamanna will grant me this, and he'll open the hellmouth.  And every other demon dimension there is."

"Every other?  You need the Key for that.  No one knows where the Key is," Anya said, wondering if he truly knew.

"Anyanka, my dear, you have much to learn.  The Key resides here in the Valley of the Sun.  It was sent to be protected in human form.  I have two of my men working on bringing her to me."

"Her?"

"A pretty little thing.  Human child.  She's about fifteen years old.  Dawn, I believe she is called."

Anya nodded, trying not to show her dismay.  There had been a chance that Court had not known exactly who the Key was, but it was official.  Dawn's secret identity was definitely no longer secret.

"You can get to this girl?  Dawn?"

"One of my men, my newest recruit actually, he has the girl's complete trust.  He will not fail me.  There is too much at stake for him, no pun intended," Court said.

"And the other?  You said there were two."

"My right hand man.  If my new recruit can't, then…my boy won't fail me."

Anya nodded and stuck her hands in her pocket.

"Right, well…I have to be off.  There's…things to do.  Vengeance to be venged," Anya said awkwardly.  "It was nice seeing you."

She took off before Court had a chance to stop her.

"That girl always was an odd one."

~*~

"Do you ever want to go back?" Buffy asked William as they lay on their stomachs in a field of green grass, watching as the world continued to go on.

William gave a small laugh.

"Part of me was glad to go.  I think that night, in the alley with Drusilla, I almost wanted her to kill me.  You see, it's not only Slayer's who have a death wish," he said.

"I didn't have a death wish," Buffy said angrily.

"But part of you is glad it's over, right?  Part of you is saying, 'I'm done.  I did what I had to do, and now someone else can do it,' aren't you?" William said intuitively.

"I don't want to go back if that's what you're asking.   I mean…I do, but…not if I had to go back to what was happening.  The fighting, the killing, the…mayhem and destruction that was my life.  If I could go back and not have any of that in my life, then…maybe," Buffy conceded.

"If I could go back now…have the confidence that _he has, have the love and support that he's found, then yes I would go back.  But if I had died a natural death, I wouldn't have gone back for the world.  I watched what happened why I disappeared.  Watched as the demon took my body.  You see, I was still in love with Cecily.  __He…I think he was too."_

"He didn't…"

"No.  He didn't kill her.  He never killed anyone he knew.  Except for the man who insulted him at the party on the night he died.  Tortured him to death with rail road spikes.  Part of me was almost happy to see him go," William said, blushing a little.

"But I watched Cecily.  I watched her as she grew more concerned for me.  She…she felt guilty for me.  She didn't know where I was.  She cried for me once," he said, tears coming to his eyes.  "She told her sister that it was her fault that I had left.  That she had taken my presence for granted and that if she could have redone the night, she would have told me that just because she didn't love me, didn't mean that she didn't like me."

Buffy nodded silently and rolled onto her back.

"I wish I had have told him…you…Spike…whoever.  I wish I had have told him that …I dunno.  That he wasn't beneath me.  That he wasn't a monster.  That I did see him as a man.  That he did have a chance, but…but that I needed to deal with some things first," Buffy said.

"He knew."

Buffy laughed a little.  "Don't know how.  All I ever did was rag on him," she said guiltily.

"And all he ever did was try to kill you.  You were both trained to do what you did, and breaking those barriers down was always going to be hard.  But…you saw past the barriers.  He saw past the Slayer in you and you saw past the demon in him."

"But I didn't," Buffy said.  "I couldn't see past the demon.  The demon is who he is.  It made him the guy that I was starting to fall for."

"But because of Angelus, you thought that he couldn't love you.  Couldn't care for you," William said.

"I just don't understand how Spike can do good voluntarily.  Even when Angel didn't have his soul, he still wanted to do evil.  His demon wanted him to commit horrible acts.  But Spike…I don't understand how he can not want to do the things he used to," Buffy said.

"Do you know how hard it was for him to stop being evil?  To go against his very nature just to try and show you that he was capable of changing?  Not only when you were there to watch, but even when you weren't.  He'd help people, he'd stake vampires, and not to impress you.  He went against everything he was taught to believe, and eventually, his demon began giving up.  The demon hated that Spike couldn't feed, couldn't hurt, couldn't kill.  The pain Spike felt when he went to hurt was half chip, half demon tearing into his body," William explained.

"It hurt him to help me?" Buffy asked.

William nodded sombrely.  "Sometimes it hurt worse than the chip.  Sometimes it hurts so much that the only thing he can do to take his mind off it is clench his fists until he makes them bleed just to feed the bloodlust of the demon."

Buffy fell into a shocked silence and closed her eyes.  "I never knew.  None of us…we never really asked.  I mean…he was just there, whether we wanted him to be or not.  We…we took him for granted I think."

"He was there because he wanted to be.  He sincerely wanted to help you."

Buffy opened her eyes and rolled over again, looking down at the earthly Spike, wondering why fate was cruelly opening her eyes now and not several months earlier.

~*~

"Giles, we have a problem," Anya said, bursting into the store.  Giles looked up, almost smiling at the similar entrance that Spike had made only half an hour ago.

Xander rushed over to her, engulfing her in his arms.

"Are you okay?  What's wrong?" he asked, his concern evident in his voice.

"I'm fine.  I found Court…well, he found me, but…that's not the point," Anya rambled.  
"And what is the point, luv?" Spike asked from his seat at the table.

"The demon that he wants to turn into, it's…it's bad."

"Mayor bad?" Xander asked.

"Worse.  Much worse.  He wants to transform into Korickana," Anya said.

If it was possible, Spike went whiter than usual.

"He can't!" Spike yelled, getting to his feet.

"Well, he's going to," Anya yelled back.

Xander looked between his fiancé and the demon he loathed.

"Who's Korickana?"

"A demon.  Invincible.  Unstoppable.  Unkillable.  And a right bloody pain to get rid of," Spike said.

Anya looked at him, surprised by the last part of his explanation.

"Get rid of?  You can't 'get rid of' a Korick demon.  It's impossible."

"Hey, tell that to the vamp who got rid of 'im, not me," Spike said, holding up his hands in defence.

"Just hold on a moment," Giles said.  "What is a Korickana demon?  What does it do?  What does it look like?"

Spike looked at Anya, telling her that the floor was hers.

"A Korickana, or a Korick demon is a demon who looks like a human.  They can walk in the human world, meaning they can be in the sunlight.  They have the feeding patterns of a vampire, but they're more powerful.  They're invincible, there's no known way to kill them," Anya explained.

"Okay," Xander said.  "Then why does deadboy junior think that they can be got rid of?"

"Because I know who got rid of one," Spike said testily.  "Bout fifty years back, just after the war.  We came face to face with a Korick, smug bastard if ever I saw one.  Always rattlin' on about how he was invincible and the like.  We got right sick of the prat, so got rid of him."

"Yes, but how?" Giles asked.

"Drusilla.  She worked a bit of mojo, dark magicks and such.  Sent him to a nether realm and we never heard of him again," Spike said.  "Thank heavens."

"But he didn't die.  He was only sent to another reality.  Meaning that some other poor dimension has a Korick demon who's probably still killing people," Anya said angrily.

"Hey, don't shoot the messenger, luv.  I'm just narrating here."

Anya folded her arms over her chest, and leant back against Xander for support.

"So even if this Court guy achieves his transformation thingy, we still have a chance to get rid of him?" Xander asked.  "I mean, we can send him to another reality?"

"There must be some other way of killing a Korick demon," Giles said logically.  No one can be completely invincible.  If we were able to defeat Glory, then a Korick demon should be no harder."

"Glory didn't die," Anya said.  "Ben did.  Remember?" 

Giles looked away, torn between feeling guilt at taking an innocent life, and feeling elated that their greatest foe was dead.

"Well, you were a demon, weren'tcha?" Spike asked.  "How come you're all mortal again?"

Anya glared at him and felt Xander tense up a little.

"My power centre was destroyed," she explained.  Two years ago, she would have glared at Giles for destroying it, but somehow, she felt that it was meant to be this way.

"Does a Korick demon have a power centre?" Xander asked.

"If it does, he hides it very well.  He was bugging the hell outta us for five years before Dru sent his annoying ass to a different realm.  We never found it."

"Yes, well…perhaps it would be best to research into this Korick demon," Giles suggested.  He looked towards Xander who groaned but stood up.

"I'm research guy.  Maybe we should get the girls here as well," Xander suggested.

"Good idea.  Why don't you go call them…oh and see if they've made any progress with de-ratting Amy."

~*~

Willow and Tara sat cross-legged on the floor of the Summers' living room.  Dawn was upstairs doing her homework, remembering vividly the lecture she had had from Buffy about the importance of keeping on top of her studies.  If she didn't do well in school, she would be taken away from the family that she had adopted herself into.

Between Willow and Tara was Amy the rat was running between them, sniffing excitedly, as though she knew that this was going to work.

"Uh, Willow…shouldn't we have some…some clothes, maybe.  I mean…she's…she's probably gonna be…" Tara trailed off.

Willow laughed a little and stood up.  "I never even thought of that.  Kinda like the time that Buffy was a rat and when she was…de-ratted, she wasn't wearing too much either.  She was so embarrassed," Willow said, laughing at the memory.

Her laughter stopped as she realised that Buffy was no longer with them.  Tara gave her a comforting smile and watched as Willow rushed about the room, getting clothing that would most likely fit the de-ratted Amy.

"When was she turned into a rat?" Tara asked softly, not pushing too hard for an answer, but hopefully bringing up a time that would be something that Willow would smile at.

"Ages ago," Willow replied.  "We were still in high school.  Xander cast a spell that went a lot worse than mine used to.  He ended up with every female in Sunnydale in love with him."

Tara laughed and watched her girlfriend sit back down.

"Anyway, Buffy was in the library, hitting on him, offering to strip for him, and Amy comes in, jealous as anything.  She starts with the magicks, and poof.  Buffy's a rat.  Giles was…well, I hate to used the word pissed off, but that's what he was.  I've never seen him that angry before.  Anyway…long story short, Giles made Amy do the de-ratting spell while…someone else was looking for her."

"Someone else?" Tara asked.

"Oz," Willow said, hating the stab of pain that still went through her heart every time she thought about her ex-boyfriend.  

"He saw Buffy in…the buff?" Tara asked.

"No, no.  She was half covered by some boxes."

Tara nodded, hating that Willow was still so affected by the man who had left her so many years ago.

"Well at least Amy can have something to change into quickly."

Willow nodded and took Tara's hand.  Willow gave a small smile and nodded.

"Goddess of creatures great and small, I conjure thee to withdraw," Tara said forcefully, her eyes closed.

"Hecate, I hereby license thee to depart," Willow finished.

With their eyes closed, they saw a brilliant flash and then a gentle whimpering noise.

Willow opened her eyes tentatively to see the girl with long brown hair sitting in front of her, grabbing at the clothing Willow had placed beside the circle, trying desperately to cover her nudity.

"It worked!" Willow cried.

Tara opened her eyes and closed them immediately as she saw this complete stranger naked in front of her.

Amy gave a smile and changed quickly, standing up and stretching.

"Somehow, thank you doesn't seem to be a strong enough word right now," Amy said, pulling Willow into a tight hug.

Amy turned to Tara and stopped.

"I'm Amy," she said, holding her hand out for Tara to shake.

"Tara," she replied.  They shook hands and Amy immediately turned back to Willow.

"So uh…how long did it take for the whole de-ratting thing to happen?" Amy asked.

"Uh…couple of years.  I'm so sorry.  There's just been so much happening, and…I'm sorry."

"Don't sweat it.  Unless it's the year 2003 or something," Amy said.

"2001 actually," Tara said shyly.

"2001?  I've been a rat for three years?" Amy asked.

Willow shrugged and gave a small smile.  "Do you remember all of it?"

"Parts.  I remember being changed back to normal and then being turned into a rat again.  I was so not happy about that," Amy said, smiling a little, happy to be out of her small cage and out of her small body.

"Changed to normal?  When?" Willow asked.

"I don't know.  It was in a different room though.  I saw the back of your head and a blonde girls.  You were cleaning my cage I think."

Willow thought back to when this could have been done.

"Oh Amy, I'm so sorry.  I was doing this 'I will it so' spell, but I thought it had gone kabluey.  It must have worked, and I was saying how I didn't have as much power as you.  I think I said something about how you were a perfectly normal girl and then you were a rat," Willow explained.

"That would have been it.  I was so frustrated that day."

Tara gave a small smile.  "I can imagine."

Willow grimaced. "Don't worry, you weren't the only one I affected.  Buffy managed to get herself engaged to Spike that day."

Tara burst out laughing, holding her aching sides as she stopped, only to start again.  Willow grinned at the memory of the two kissing on the floor of the old crypt.

"It was kinda funny," Willow admitted.

Amy smiled, not sure who Spike was, but could only imagine that they must have hated each other.

"Where is Buffy anyway?" Amy asked.

The laughter ceased automatically and Tara looked down at the floor once more.

Willow went to answer but was cut off by the telephone ringing.

"Hello?  Oh, hey Xander.  Yeah it worked.  She's been de-ratted," Willow said.

Amy gave a large grin and mouthed another 'thank you' at Willow who smiled back.

"Anya and Spike are back?  Bad news?  I guess this is Sunnydale, what other kind of news can we really be expecting.  Yeah, we'll be there in about ten minutes.  See ya."

Willow grabbed her bag from the bed and looked towards Tara and Amy.

"We're wanted at the Magic Box.  Anya and Spike got back bearing bad news for all.  What a way to start your un-ratted life.  If you want to come and help that is," Willow said.

Amy shrugged.  "I don't think I really have much else planned for tonight anyway, so…yeah, I'm good to go."

Willow nodded.  "Alright.  I'll go get Dawn and we'll be off."

Amy turned to look at Willow.  "Who's Dawn?"

"Buffy's younger sister.  Sort of," Willow said.

Amy nodded, a little confused.  "I didn't know Buffy had a younger sister."

Tara looked at Willow, wondering whether the spell that distorted their reality had somehow by-passed Amy due to her being a rat.

Willow made a mental note to ask Giles whether or not this could happen.

~*~

All heads looked up as the three witches and Dawn entered the shop.  Giles smiled as he saw Amy in her natural state, thankful that the spell had worked.

"Amy, good to see you again," he said gently.

Amy smiled, knowing that nothing would be able to ruin this day for her.  No words could express how thankful she was that she was finally human again.

"Uh, this is Anya and Spike.  You remember Xander of course," Giles said, thinking back to when Xander had teamed up with the young with to cast the love spell that backfired badly.

Amy gave a small smile.  She glanced towards the man that Giles had introduced as Spike and couldn't understand why the thought of he and Buffy being engaged had been such a hilarious issue.

"Nice to meet you," Amy said politely.  She took a seat next to Xander, who smiled and gave a small wave.

"Good to have you back," Xander said.

Anya felt a familiar jealous tug at her heart but ignored it, knowing that Xander would never cheat on her.  She thought.  Hoped.  Wished.  Well…anyway.

Giles cleared his throat and looked towards Spike.  He didn't even flinch as Dawn sat beside the vampire and rested her elbow casually on his knee.

"Perhaps you could fill in these four on what we've found out," he suggested.

Spike looked up and raised his eyebrows.  "What do I look like, a story teller?" 

Amy gave a small laugh, surprised by the strong cockney accent and the lilt in his voice.

Giles sighed softly and looked towards Willow, Tara and Amy.

"The long and short of it is this.  Court is looking to raise Yhidnamanna in order to become the demon Korickana."

"The demon in human form?" Tara asked.

Giles nodded and chose to ignore the surprised look that Willow shot her girlfriend.

"They're not the nicest of demons.  Hard to get rid of," Tara said.

"So we've heard," Xander commented.

Spike gave a low groan, indignant that they all took Tara's response at face value but had questioned his input on the demon until the cows had come home.

"But not impossible, right?" Willow asked.

"Apparently not.  With the right majicks, it's possible to send them to a nether realm," Giles explained.

"Uh…I don't know if that's such a good idea," Tara said shyly.

Spike gave her a look, wondering how this girl who looked so innocent could know so much about Korick demons.

"Why's that?  If he ain't in our realm, I say it's a good idea," the blonde vampire said.

"But you're just sending him away, you're not killing it," Tara explained.

Anya groaned and stood up.  "How many times do I have to tell people?  Korick demons can't be killed!"

Tara looked away, embarrassed at being chastised in such a manner from the ex-demon.

Spike looked towards the shy witch, knowing instinctively that there was something that she was too timid to share with the group.

"Maybe, maybe not," Spike said.

Tara looked up at him, thankful that she had not had to express her thoughts of being right.

"You think you know another way?" Giles asked.

"No," Spike said.  "But I think Sabrina here might have an idea."

Tara blushed and gave a small laugh.

"Tara?" Willow asked gently.  "What do you know about them?"

Tara looked up and found the group staring at her expectantly.

"Well…when I…when I thought that I was a demon, I did a lot of research into them.  I couldn't figure out what sort of a demon I was considering I h – had no aspects of any of them," she explained.  "But I found this one.  The Korick demon.  They can walk in sunlight, and they're basically human.  But powerful.  I kind of eliminated it when I saw they drank blood.  That would just be…really disgusting."

She shot Spike a look, almost apologising for the insult to him.  He smiled good naturedly and licked his lips, winking playfully.

"The book that I was looking at, it said that the Korick demon had only one way of being destroyed.  It had to be killed by that which created it," Tara said.

Giles stood up and made his way up the ladder to where his personal collection of books were kept.  He pulled out one on demonology and brought it back down to the table.

"Is this the book you were using?" he asked, placing it in front of Tara.

The girl nodded and took the book from him, turning to the pages concerning the demon.

"Here," Tara said.  She pushed the book in front of Willow, silently hoping her girlfriend would understand that she didn't want to read in front of the group.  It had been hard enough speaking of her knowledge of the demon, let alone giving them a lecture on the topic.

"The Korick demon.  Sustained by the life-flow of human beings.  They cannot be killed by weapons, fire, water or lack of air.  They kill for sport, and their power lies in their creator," Willow summarised.

"So, there power centre is really the demon who made them," Xander said.  "So, if we kill this Yhidnamanna demon, the Korickana will go away, right?"

"Not exactly," Anya said.  "The text is a bit vague.  It's power lies in its creator means that only its creator can control it.  If its creator were to die, then the Korick demon would have free reign.  In this case, the only way to get rid of the Korick demon is for Yhidnamanna to kill it."

"Which begs the question, why would Yhidnamanna kill the Korick demon if he was the one who created it?" Dawn asked.

"Nibblet's got a point," Spike said.  "Why would good ole Yhiddy kill Korick?"

Anya blinked thoughtfully.

"If the Korick demon is going to be controlled by Yhidnamanna, what's to stop it trying to break free from Yhidnamanna's hold?" Anya asked.

"Respect," Spike replied.  "You respect the guy who made you, whether you want to or not.  No matter how hard I tried, I could never kill my sire.  There's a bond there, so strong that it physically aches sometimes."

Amy looked up, surprised by the Brit's announcement.  He was a vampire.

"Don't look so surprised, pet," Spike said to Amy, seeing her reaction.  "I'm not goin' to bite."

"He's vegetarian nowadays," Dawn explained.

Giles coughed a little in the silence that followed.  "If Court is planning on killing Yhidnamanna, it would mean that he would be immortal.  He couldn't be killed.  Transporting him to another realm may be the only option there."

"Are you saying we want to keep Yhidnamanna alive?" Xander asked.  "Cause, that's what it's beginning to sound like."

"I – I suppose, in the worst case, if Court does become a Korick demon, our best hope of defeating him would be to keep Yhidnamanna alive," Giles said.

"And in the best case, we kill Yhidnamanna before he can turn Court into the demon," Anya finished.

"Right," Giles said.  "But for now, the only thing we can really do is read up on both the Korick demon and on Yhidnamanna.  I think it might be best if we were to research a way to close the hellmouth as well.  If anything were to go wrong, and the hellmouth is opened…well…we may have to close it fairly quickly."

Willow nodded, silently taking on the closing of the hellmouth as her area of research.  After looking through alternative ways to close demon dimension, hellmouths wouldn't be a problem.

Spike yawned and rubbed his eyes.  "Well, if you don't need me, then I'm going to bed.  Been up a lot longer than I thought I was gonna be up.  If you need me, I'll be at the Nibblet's."

Giles nodded his approval and watched as Spike went to the door.

"It's my night for patrol, ain't it?"

"Isn't it, and yes it is," Giles said.

Spike smirked at the comparatively young British man.

"Well…good night, or morning for you I guess.  Don't have too much fun with your books," he said.

"Yeah, no problems there," Xander moaned. 


	6. Chapter Five: Powers That Be

CHAPTER FIVE: POWERS THAT BE 

Buffy sighed and looked around, William hadn't been by her side today, and as much as she hated to seem co-dependant, it hadn't been the same as it was yesterday.

She sat up, her legs coming up to tuck beneath her chin, her arms going around her knees.  She watched what was happening every day, not knowing why she watched, only knowing that she needed to know.

"Buffy Summers?" 

Buffy turned her head to see who was addressing her.  She looked at the young man in confusion.

"Yes?  Do I know you?"

The man shook his head.  "No you don't.  I'm here to offer you something."

"Offer me something?  I – I don't understand.  Who are you?" she asked.

He stepped closer to her and offered her his hand.

"Come, I have much to explain."

________________________

"You are the Chosen One, correct?" the man asked.

She nodded, wondering where he was going.

"You were told that death was your gift, were you not?"

"I was.  I gave that gift.  Gladly," she said.

He nodded and gave a short smile.  "We know."  
"We?" she asked, looking around for any other signs of life.

"The Powers."

She stared at him, amazed.  "The Powers.  As in the Powers That Be?"

He nodded and watched in amusement as the shock set in.

"We were watching you.  It was we who chose you, did you know?"

She shook her head.  "I thought the Watchers Council chose me."

"No.  They do not choose Slayers.  They train them.  They have not had much success with the last Chosen One."

"That wasn't her fault!" Buffy cried.

He held up a hand to silence her.  "We know.  Her time was meant to have come to an end many months before.  No matter.  We are here to discuss you, not her."

He lead her towards a blinding light, so bright that she closed here eyes and covered them with her hands.  When she removed her hands, the light was  gone, and she found herself standing in a room with three other young men, all of them looking similar to the one who had brought her here.

"You are the Powers?"

They nodded in unison.

"We watched you," said the First, the one who had guided her here.

"You fight passionately," said the Second.

"You love with an ardent fervour so great that others cannot understand," said the Third.

Buffy looked expectantly towards the Fourth young man.

He smiled and gave a small shrug.  "What they said."

Buffy laughed and turned to the First.  "Why am I here?"

"You are here because the world is in debt to you."

"In debt?" she repeated.

"The Chosen One sacrifices herself to the world," explained the Second.

"Not just in her final battle," the Third said.

"But in the daily war that you fight for," finished the First.  "We are here to pay that debt."

She shook her head, not understanding what they were offering.

"Your sacrifice was your life," the First said.  

"The gift you gave was your death," said the Second.

"The gift you are to receive is your life," finished the third.

Buffy stared at them, completely taken aback.

"My life?  As in…go back?" she asked.

The Four Powers nodded simultaneously.

"Your death was your choice, your life shall be one also," the First said.

"You mean, I have to choose between staying here or going back?" she asked.

The Powers nodded once more.

"Why?  Why not just send me back?"

"You like it here," said the First.

"For some, going back would be like going to hell," the Second explained.

"For others, it would be simply a second chance.  Or a third chance in your case, we believe," the Third said.

Buffy turned to the Fourth expectantly.  He remained silent.  "You don't talk much do you?"

"Sucks being the youngest," he explained.

The First shook his head and took Buffy's hand.

"The choice is yours.  We cannot force you into remaining or returning."

Buffy looked down, torn between her old life and the new life of comfort and safety she held here.

"Can I have some time?" she asked.

The First nodded and gave a small smile.  "If you decide to go back, all you have to do is close your eyes, and say 'return'.  If you wish to remain here, then you do so."

"Can – can I take someone with me?"

The Fist turned to the other Three.  She watched as they spoke to each other silently.

"You may take one.  But know this, your time and theirs is limited.  You are still to be a mortal.  And as a Slayer, you're-"

"I know, my expiration date is not for a long shelf life," Buffy finished.

"We'll be watching over you.  Regardless of your decision.  You've always been a favourite of ours," the First said.

"Thank you," she said softly.

She paused a little before turning to the First.  "If I do go back, I'm not going to wake up in my grave, am I?"

The First shook his head, giving her a soft smile.  "We would not put you back there.  You would be placed on your grave, not in it.  Next to the headstone, most likely."

She nodded, thankful for small miracles.  Or large miracles…she didn't know which.

The First led her away from the others.  "Come.  You have much to decide."

~*~

_Spike ran his hands through her hair, pulling her towards him, collapsing in a laughing heap onto the bed that was in his crypt.  _

_"You're so beautiful," he whispered adoringly, gently pulling her head down to meet her lips with his own._

_She smiled and leaned in to his kiss.  Without any extra effort, Spike managed to turn them over so he was on top of her, staring down into her eyes._

_"Why do you bring me here each day?" he asked softly._

_She gave a small shrug and smiled coyly._

_"You want me here," she replied simply._

_"It's not a question of whether or not I want you.  I've wanted you in one way or another for the last four years."_

_She smiled as he brought his lips to her neck._

_"I could hurt you, you know that luv?" he whispered._

_"And somehow, I can't seem to care," she replied._

_He gently took a nip at her neck with blunt teeth, sucking gently on the skin there.  He could feel her pulse racing, but not because of fear.  It was something else entirely that he hadn't felt from her since the night in the alley when she had told him he was beneath her._

_He gave a small chuckle at the irony of his thought._

_"What is it?" she asked._

_"Just remembering when you told me I was beneath you," he replied, his lips only leaving her neck to speak.  He immediately resumed his tender assault on her skin._

_Within a fraction of a second, Spike found himself on his back, Buffy's face hovering above him.  She grinned and kissed his lips passionately._

_"Told you," she whispered._

_He smiled and placed two gentle hands on her hips.  _

_"Somehow it seems a lot more appealing than it did a few weeks ago."_

_From behind them there was a pounding on the door.  Buffy looked up, startled, eyeing the door frantically._

_"I have to go," she said, removing herself from him in a matter of seconds.  He caught her wrist and pulled her closer to him, standing up to meet her at eye level._

_"Stay."_

_She shook her head and kissed him once more._

_"Wait, okay?  It's not much longer.  You'll see."_

_The knock on the door continued, the sound echoing through the crypt._

_"I love you," he whispered._

Spike woke up with a start and heard the knocking on the door continuing.  So that's what had woken him up, he thought.  He sighed and moved to his feet.

His sense told him that it was still light outside, so, carefully placing himself out of the sunlight, he opened the door to his crypt.  He hadn't been prepared to see the Nibblet walk in without a care in the world.

~*~

"What are you doing here?" he asked, his thoughts still on the dream that she had woken him from.

"I had to talk to you," she said.

"It's not safe here Nibblet, you know that.  Especially not now," he said, his voice close to becoming a yell.

"Now?  What, in daylight?  No offence Spike, but if you haven't worked out that the sunlight kills you, then you are deeply stupid," she said, a small smile adorning her face.

She ran his hands through his sleep-tousled hair and moved back to his bed, taking a seat.

Dawn's face suddenly fell.  "Spike, I'm sorry.  I didn't think.  I shoulda known that it's kinda bed time for you."

She went to leave but Spike stopped her, calling her back.  "It's okay.  I wasn't sleeping too well anyway," he said.

"Liar," she said.

He gave a small grin and pointed to the bed, offering her a seat.  She sat down a little awkwardly, sitting Indian style on the rumpled covers.

"I just…I needed to talk to someone, and…I dunno.  I kinda thought of you first," she admitted.

He gave a soft smile and motioned for her to continue.

"I just…I keep having these weird dreams.  About her.  And I can't stop them, and I don't know what any of it means.  I just…I don't want to get my hopes up, but…part of me is saying that maybe I can get my hopes up.  That maybe there's a chance that we could get her back," Dawn said.

Spike shook his head, knowing the familiar feeling of hoping for something that couldn't ever happen.

"Nibblet, I know you tried that resurrection spell on your mum, but…like the Doc said, that's some powerful magic you're dealing with.  If she came back…different…I just know that it wouldn't be good," Spike said.

She looked at him, offended by his thought of her trying to do a spell like that again.  "I know, and I wouldn't try the spell again anyway.  I know that even though there's a chance that she would be the same, the chances of it turning out badly are even bigger, but…I still just think that maybe she'll walk through the front door at night after a patrol.  Or that I'll get up in the morning and she'll be down in the kitchen, trying to make waffles, like she and mom used to do before…" Dawn trailed off.  She had had her entire family ripped away from her in a matter of months, and Spike could tell that she wasn't coping.

"I know what you mean," he said, sympathetically.  "Some nights, I kinda just expect her to bust open the doors and stand there, hands on her hips, glaring down at me, kicking my arse for something stupid that I did.  As for the dreams, well…they're there.  Every night."

Dawn looked down at her hands which were fidgeting with the covers on the bed for lack of something better to do with them.  Spike saw her agitation and almost smiled with the memory that Buffy would always fiddle with her hands when she was anxious, or nervous.

"You're so much like your big sis'," he said.

Dawn smiled, tears in her eyes.

"Thank you."

Spike smiled and hesitantly touched her knee.  "You should get back to the Magic Shop before Giles starts worrying."

Dawn nodded and stood up.  Spike followed her over to the door and stopped her just as she went to walk out.

"You know that if you want to talk about…anything…you can talk to me.  Bottling stuff up inside of you hurts a lot more than talking about it.  Believe me," he said.

"Thank you."

~*~

William sat, watching the lives of Buffy's friends pan out before him.  He had been waiting for her to return from her visit with the Powers, somehow unconsciously knowing that she would be leaving him within a matter of moments.

He heard her approaching from behind him, and his thoughts were confirmed when he heard her voice break into the silence that had previously surrounded him.

"Will?"

He turned to see her standing behind him uncertainly.  He reached out a hand, beckoning for her to join him where he sat.  She took hesitant steps forward and sat herself beside him.

"Will, there's some things that need to be said," she started, her voice slow and broken as she stumbled over the words that she didn't know how to express.

"They want you to go back, don't they?" he asked, his question making her speech seem a little less difficult.

Funny how both Spike and Will always knew what she was thinking and what she needed when she was unsure of what it was herself.

She nodded, answering his question.  He turned away from her a little, hoping she wouldn't notice his tears.  She reached her hand up to his face, wiping away the stray tear from his eyes.

"They said I could go back.  'Cause of how I died," she said simply.

"Because you sacrificed yourself so that the world could continue," William said.

She nodded, wondering how many people could say that they had plummeted off a tower to save the world.

"I was told that death was my gift to give.  Life is my gift to receive.  But…I don't have to take it," she said.

He looked at her, astonished that she would even consider not taking the offer.

"You have to go back.  Buffy, this is the chance of a lifetime.  You could do the things you never got to do, see your friends…tell _him_ the truth," William said.

"I don't want to leave here though. I've got you and I've got my mom," she said.

"But you've got everyone else that you love down there.  You're sister…you're friends.  Spike."

"I know that," she said.  "But, it's…it's beautiful here.  And I can still see them from here.  I can see that they're doing okay," she said.

"But they can't see you.  And you can't talk to them or touch them, or any of that.  And I know you want that.  Buffy, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity.  No one gets to go back except the truly tremendous.  That's you pet," he said.

She nodded and looked down at her hands, wondering how he would react to what she was about to ask.

"They uh…they said that I could take someone with me.  To go back," she admitted.

He looked at her, his eyes wide.

"I want you to come with me," she said.

He smiled and leant forward, kissing her forehead softly.

"Thank you, but…I can't.  That's not my world anymore.  It's _his_.  And you love him, not me," he explained.

"Please, Will.  I need you.  I can't go down there alone.  I can't live down there with no one else realising what going back means.  I want you with me."

He sighed and took her hands.

"Buffy…I love you, honestly I do.  I would do anything within my grasp to help you, but what you're asking me to do-"

"Will, please!" she looked at him desperately, her heart aching with the confusion that had plagued her since the Powers had made their offer.

He gave her a soft smile and stood up.

"You should say good bye to your mum," he said.

"Will you come with me?" she asked.

"I'll make sure you get there safely," he promised.

________________________

Joyce hugged her daughter tightly, saddened that she was leaving, but rejoicing in the fact that Buffy was being given another chance at life.

"Take care of Dawn, okay?" Joyce whispered.

Buffy nodded and kissed her mom on the cheek, stepping out of her mom's comforting embrace.

William took Buffy by the hand and gently brushed his lips against hers.

"You ready?" he asked.

She nodded and closed her eyes, holding onto William's hand loosely.

"Return," she whispered.

It was too late for her to notice that William had dropped her hand.

With that, she plummeted into the darkness.

~*~

Spike looked up at the clock that sat in Main Street, the large hands on its face telling him that it was five in the morning.  The sun would be up soon, which meant that it was time to start heading back towards the Summers' home.

He turned to begin walking through one of the cemetery's but stopped as he heard a noise behind him.

A hand shot up through a freshly covered up grave.  He sighed, taking a stake out of the pocket of his trusty duster, waiting for the vamp to get up.

"Welcome back," Spike said, hiding the stake behind his back.

The vamp looked at him, confused.  "You're like me?" 

Spike nodded and stepped towards him.

"I'm like you.  But, I don't play by our rules," he said.

The vamp looked at him in confusion for a second until Spike pulled the stake from behind his back and plunged it into the vamp's heart.  The vamp dusted and Spike continued walking.

He stopped as he reached Restfield cemetery, the place where he had spent several years in his crypt.  It was also the cemetery that held the girl of his dreams, as well as that girl's mother.

He opened the creaking gates and stepped inside, his heart heavy.  He checked the time on his fob-watch that had been attached to him since the early 1900's.

5:20 in the morning.  Which meant that the other vampires would be heading back to their shelter houses, and no one would be outside.  This, in turn, meant that he could go and visit Buffy's grave.

He knew he was cutting it close, but his crypt was only metres away from her gravesite, and he wasn't expected to be back at the Magic Shop before sunset.

He sighed as he walked the path towards Buffy's grave, wishing for a moment that he had never come back to Sunnydale in the first place.  Immediately, he stripped the thought from his mind, grateful for every second that he had spent with the Slayer.

With his head down and his hands in his pockets, Spike approached the grave.  His ears pricked to attention as he heard someone yelling, screaming non-stop.

He broke into a run and followed the voice to Buffy's grave.  He saw someone, a young woman yelling at the heavens, kicking the headstone that read:

Buffy Anne Summers

1982 - 2001

Beloved sister and friend.

She saved the world a lot.

Spike charged towards them, not caring that his chip would shock him if the violator of _his_ girl's grave was human or not.  He tackled her to the ground, getting her away from Buffy's headstone.

She wriggled beneath him, fighting violently with him, her fists pounding into his chest.  She got out from beneath him, standing up, but he wouldn't let her get past him.  She was screaming at him, words that sounded as though they didn't exist, but as her energy drained, he could make out the words that she yelled.

"You liar!  You lied to me!  Will!!  How could you?!"

He caught her wrists as they beat his chest, and to his surprise, she collapsed against him, sobs wracking her body.  He held her up, and took a step back, trying to see who this woman was.

He pushed back her dishevelled hair, only to stare into the eyes which he had dared not to hope to see again.

"Buffy?"

~*~

Spike looked down at the young woman in front of him, his head telling him to distrust his eyes, but his heart couldn't help but leap with the thought that this truly was Buffy.

Her body suddenly went limp, and he almost failed to keep her from hitting the ground.  He picked her up effortlessly and quickly thought about where would be the safest place for him to take her.

The hairs on his skin started to prickle with apprehension, a sign that told him the sun was coming up.  He hesitated a moment before making his decision.  The safest and quickest place to take her was his crypt.

He carried her easily and entered the crypt just as the sun began to make it's first appearance .  He placed the unconscious girl onto his bed, pulling the covers up around her.  He knelt beside her, his hands moving towards her face.

It was exactly how he had remembered her, her clothes the same as those she had worn on her last day of battle.  He pushed a stray strand of hair away from her face and leant forward, brushing his lips over her forehead.

"Is this what I was waiting for luv?" he whispered.  "You were trying to tell me that you were coming back?"

Buffy lay completely still, her body fallen into a deep sleep, as one could imagine a body would do after going through the shock of coming back from the dead.

He stood up, beginning to pace around the room, never going more than a few feet from the bed.  

He looked again at his watch, surprised to see that it was already seven thirty.  He had been with her for an hour and a half without noticing the time flying by.

He didn't know what to do, or even if this was real.  He pinched himself several times until his skin became a little red.  "Definitely not a dream," he whispered to himself.  

He stopped pacing and stood beside the bed, looking down at the small blonde haired woman who captured his heart.

"I have to get your Watcher, pet.  He'll know what to do," he whispered.

He gave her a final kiss, his lips gently touching hers.

He quickly scrawled a note to her, just in case she woke up.  He knew he didn't want to leave her to wake up on her own, but he couldn't handle being in their alone and not knowing what had happened.

He moved to the basement area of the crypt and swiftly made his way through the sewers, stopping when he knew he was just outside the magic shop.  He threw the blanket he had brought over himself and quickly came up from a manhole and made a mad dash into the shop.

Giles looked up, startled to see the vampire at such an early hour.

"Spike, what is it?"

Spike tried to find the words to explain what he needed to, but found that nothing could express what had happened.

"There's something you need to see."

Giles looked at him uncertainly.  "What is it?"

"I can't explain, but we have to hurry.  You _need_ to see this, okay.  Just trust me."

Giles nodded, still a little hesitant about following the vampire who hadn't explained his erratic behaviour.  But if his Slayer could trust the blonde vampire, then Giles could as well.

"How did you get here?  The sun's out."

"Sewers.  They run through the majority of Sunnydale.  Just….meet me at my crypt okay?  Hurry," Spike said, dashing back to the manhole he had only just emerged from.

Giles shook his head, worried about the mentality of the vampire, wondering if the grief had finally gotten to him completely.  

He turned to Anya who was looking on in confusion.

"Are you alright by yourself?"

Anya nodded and waved her hand, telling him to go.

He went outside and got into his car, regardless of his concern and drove towards the cemetery which he had secretly visited every day since Buffy's death.

He parked the car and got out, retrieving a stake and cross from the glovebox.  'Just in case,' he told himself.

He walked to Spike's crypt, stopping briefly beside Buffy's grave.  The earth looked as though there had been a fight, footprints and patches of grass gave it a dishevelled look.

He made a note to fix it when Spike had told him whatever needed to be said.  Though why it couldn't have been done at the Magic Box was beyond him.

Giles knocked on the door of the crypt and entered slowly, seeing Spike pacing beside the bed.  He could make out a lump under the bed covers and he felt his heart begin to tighten, fear suddenly coming over him.

He took a step closer and saw two feet at the bottom of the bed, a hand poking out from the top of the covers.

"Spike," Giles said cautiously.

The vampire looked up at Giles and could immediately smell his fear.

"Is this some sort of a sick joke?" Giles asked.  He readied himself to take out the cross if Spike advanced on him.

"It's not a joke.  This is very real," Spike said, the worry in his voice was evident.

"Why bring me here?" Giles asked.

"Because you're the only one that would know how to handle this," Spike explained.

Giles looked at him in confusion.

"How to handle you becoming a killer again?" he asked maliciously.

Spike looked at him, confused and a little shocked.  "A killer?  What?  She's not dead Giles.  That's what I've been trying to tell you."

Giles felt himself relax a little and took a step forward towards the bed.  As he stepped forward he could see a familiar face under the covers.

He raced forward, his knees failing, his body collapsing beside the bed.  His hands reached out, touching her face, his eyes taking in every detail.

"Buffy," he whispered, tears springing to his eyes.

He composed himself, taking short, sharp breaths of air.  He stood up and looked accusingly at the vampire.

"What did you do?" he asked, angrily.

"Me?  I didn't do anything.  You and you're lot brought her back.  You're three little witches and their magicks did this," Spike said.

Giles turned back to the sleeping girl on the bed.

"Was she like this when you found her?" he asked.

"Asleep, you mean?" Spike asked.  "She was alive and kicking when I found her.  Literally kicking.  I've got the bruises to show for it."

Giles closed his eyes, trying to rack his mind as to why this could happen.

"She hit you?"

"Hit, punched, kicked.  She's toting some finger nails to boot," Spike said.

Giles opened his eyes and knelt before his surrogate daughter, gently taking her hand with his.

"What happened to you?" he whispered softly.

He felt her stirring, and reluctantly let go of her hand.  He took a step back and watched as the Slayer's eyes began to open.

~*~

Buffy groaned softly as she began to wake up from her deep sleep.  Her muscles were aching, and she hadn't felt this tired since her eighteenth birthday.  She stretched in the bed and rolled over, before it suddenly occurred to her that she had no idea where she was.

She opened her eyes to find herself in a double bed with red satin sheets.  The walls were a dark grey concrete, ones that she had seen many, many times.  'Spike's crypt,' she thought to herself.

She felt the stab of pain from last night when she realised that William had dropped her hand at the last second, forcing her to come back to the earth alone, even after he had promised to get her there safely.

Buffy sat up, her body still sore from the transition of being dead.  She knew from watching her friends that it had been a week since her death.  A week of being separated from her friends and family.

She pulled the blankets around her and suddenly knew instinctively that she was being watched.

There were two other people in the room with her.  One human (she could tell from the heavy breathing), and one vampire.  Her Slayer 'spider-senses' had obviously already kicked in.  She knew that it was Spike, for who else would have brought her to this crypt?

She turned slowly, unsure of how the two people behind her would react to her return.

She glanced between the two men, surprised to see Giles standing beside the blonde vampire.  She held Spike's gaze for a second before turning away and looking at her Watcher.

She looked down at the covers, realising that, thankfully she was fully dressed.  She stood up, her legs a little shaky.  

Giles rushed to her side as he saw her almost stumble.  He helped her regain her balance and without hesitation, he pulled her into a crushing embrace.

She hugged him back, equally as tightly, tears coming to her eyes as she heard him whispering 'Thank God, thank God' again and again.

Giles took a step back and looked at his Slayer, thankful that he had a chance to see her again, grateful to whomever had brought her back.  His earlier anger at the stupidity of the person abusing magick had dissipated completely and his only emotion now was sheer happiness.

Spike hung back a little, watching as the Watcher and Slayer were reunited.  His heart gave a jump as he realised that this was really real.  It wasn't like his dreams where she would ask him to wait, and it wasn't like his dreams where she would always have to leave.

She was back.  Really back.

He stared at her and watched as she and Giles shared a smile.  He looked at her hopefully when she cast a glance in his direction, her eyes not leaving his this time.  He had understood without a word why she had gone to Giles first. 

Giles had been her Watcher, her father, her friend for five years.  Spike had been an enemy, then an ally, and finally a friend.  Or at least someone that could be trusted.

Buffy felt Giles give her a small push towards the blonde vampire, who had suddenly found himself moving towards her.

She fell into his embrace easily, her tears falling freely, his tears mixing with hers.  He kissed the top of her head, thankful that he was able to hold her the way he had dreamt of holding her for so many months.  

"Welcome home."

~*~

After another ten minutes of tearful hugs and warm embraces, Buffy, Giles and Spike found themselves sitting on either a chair or on Spike's bed, in Buffy's case.

Giles and Spike couldn't keep their eyes off the young woman in front of them, both fearful that at any second she would disappear and never return.

"Buffy," Giles began  "I don't want it to sound as though I'm not glad to see you, believe me, I have never been more ecstatic in my entire life, but…how did you get here?"

Buffy gave a small smile, thankful that she was so obviously wanted here in this life by both of the men in the crypt.

"It's kind of a long story," she warned.

Spike grinned.  "I've got all day luv.  Or until six o'clock this afternoon anyway."

Buffy smiled and glanced at Giles to see if he would stay and listen.

"I left Anya in charge of the Magic Box.  She should be quite capable of handling it by herself."

Buffy nodded and hugged on of Spike's pillows to her chest.

"Okay.  Well…when I died, it was…it was kind of weird.  Like I was in the middle of two places.  I know this sounds really cliché, but…I saw parts of my life flashing before me.  Different parts, some happy, some…incredibly painful.  And then, suddenly, I was standing with my mom.  I don't know where we were, it didn't seem to be anywhere specific, but…it was safe and warm, and…I was loved."

Buffy smiled at the recollection.  Not that she wasn't glad to be back, but the memories of where she was had all been good ones.

"I watched you.  All of you.  I watched the funeral and everything that came after that.  It hurt to watch, but…it was comforting to know that you guys were continuing.  That you were living.  And then…I met someone."

She turned to look at Spike.  "I met you."

Spike looked at her, wide-eyed and confused.

"Me?  I didn't go anywhere luv."

"Your soul, Spike.  I met your soul," she explained.

Giles looked at Buffy with a new interest.  "Spike's soul?  Are you certain?"

She nodded and looked at her Watcher.  "It was William.  He and I got kinda close, and…it was nice having a familiar face up there besides my mom."

Spike felt a stab of jealousy rip through his body.  Even though unconsciously he knew that William's soul was still part of who he was, the fact that William had spent the time with Buffy when he hadn't was infuriating.

"Anyway, to make a long story short, there was someone else.  Or, four someone else's actually.  The Powers."

"The Powers that Be?" Giles asked.

"Yup.  They said that I could come back here.  If I wanted to.  Which, I obviously wanted to cos…look.  Here I am," she said, smiling with a little force.

It still hurt her to think that William had lied to her about coming back with her.  He had given her false hope, and she didn't know whether she could forgive him for doing that so easily.

"Why would the Powers do that?  They're not usually that nice about things like this," Spike said.

He had heard that the Powers were forces to be reckoned with.  They were in charge of everything that lived, including the demons and the forces of darkness.  They could not control people, though they had the power of life and death.  They usually, however, only dealt with death.

"Giles, do you remember what the spirit guide told me?" Buffy asked.

Giles nodded and unconsciously removed his glasses to begin polishing them.

"Death is your gift.  I remember."

"What?" Spike exclaimed.  "What do you mean death is your gift?  Death's not a gift!"

Buffy looked at him and smiled, recalling that she had said something similar to the spirit guide herself.

"I know.  I thought that too.  But the spirit guide didn't mean that I would be the cause of death.  It meant that I could give my death as a gift."

"So, you died as a gift to the Nibblet, you mean?" Spike asked.

Buffy nodded, thankful that he had understood.

"The Powers gave me that message.  Death is my gift to give.  They told me that because I died to save the world, the world was in debt to me.  They said that my life would be my gift to receive if I wanted to take it back.  The rest is kinda obvious."

Giles smiled and replaced his glasses.  Some things never changed, including Buffy being able to make a light hearted comment about every situation they faced.  He imagined that it was the only thing that helped her to stay sane.

"So uh…I think that kinda covers it," Buffy said.

Giles nodded and stood up from his chair.

"I, uh…I kinda wanna go and see Dawn," Buffy said.

"It's Friday, pet.  She's at school already," Spike said.

Buffy's face fell, knowing that she couldn't go to the school to surprise her sister.  

"And the rest of the gang?"

"Anya's at the store.  Xander went to work early.  Willow, Tara and Amy are in classes," Giles explained.

Buffy smiled at the mention of Amy.  "Will finally figured out the spell, huh?"

Giles nodded.  "Perhaps I should let the two of you catch up.  I think leaving Anya at the store for a lengthy amount of time could potentially be disastrous," he explained.

Buffy grinned a little and stood up, hugging her Watcher once again.

"I'm glad you're back," Giles whispered.

"Me too."

Giles stepped back and glanced at Buffy once more before turning to the door.

"Giles?" 

He stopped and looked at Buffy.

"Could you, uh…not tell the others just yet?  I kinda want it to be a surprise.  I'll drop into the store at about six.  Make sure they're all there, okay?"

~*~

Spike and Buffy stood in Spike's crypt, no more than a few feet away from each other, both of them stealing glances at each other.  Whenever they're eyes, met, they would stare for a second before turning away.

"Buffy," Spike began, his voice no louder than a whisper.

She looked up at him, tears in both of their eyes.  He took a step towards her, bridging the gap between them.  Tentatively, he reached a hand up to her shoulder and felt her stiffen at his touch.  He went to take his hand a way, hurt by her flinching, but he felt her relax underneath his touch.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, a tear slipping down his cheek.

She reached up and wiped it gently from his face, shaking her head, not quite understanding what his apology was for.

"I failed you."

It finally dawned on her what he was apologising for.  Her death.  

"Spike, it wasn't your fault.  I didn't have a choice," she said softly.

"You shouldn't have had to make the choice in the first place," he cried, unable to tear his hand away from her arm.

She took a step closer to him, reaching her arms out to embrace him.  It was awkward at first until both of them relaxed into each others arms, tears falling once again.

"I'm sorry…about this morning," Buffy whispered.  "I was kinda…upset."

He smiled above her head and leant his cheek against her hair.

"I noticed that luv.  You wanna talk about it?" he offered.

She looked at him, startled by his invitation.  She took his hand and led him towards the bed, sitting down amongst the covers.  He took a seat next to her.  His eyes widened in shock as she lay down on the bed.

He lay next to her, unthreateningly, keeping his hands to himself.

She scooted over, curling herself next to him, taking his arm and resting it over his mid-section.

"Doesn't matter," she whispered, closing her eyes.

He watched her as she drifted back to sleep and couldn't help himself as he felt his eyes begin to close with hers.

Within minutes, they were both asleep, finally comfortable in each others arms.


	7. Chapter Six: Surprises

CHAPTER SIX: SURPRISE 

Dawn walked into the Magic Box, dropping her backpack unceremoniously onto the table.  

Giles looked up startled, and smiled at the young girl.  His mind immediately flew back to remembering that Buffy was alive and well, and safe in Spike's crypt.

"How was school?" he asked.

Dawn shrugged and sat down at the table, taking one of her books out from her bag.

"Same old school.  Boring teachers droning on about boring subjects.  The only good part was art," she said, smiling that she had been placed next to Kevin once again.

"You uh…you enjoy art?" he asked.  He had never really taken the time out to properly get to know his Slayer's younger sister, even though she had spent a lot of time watching Buffy train ever since she had found out that Buffy was different to other teenagers.

Dawn nodded.  "Love it.  Plus one of the guys, uh…I mean…one of the girls is my best friend, so we have a lot to talk about.  In the way of school work and such," Dawn said quickly, covering her Freudian slip.

Giles smiled, reminded once more of how Buffy would continuously think about boys instead of about school work.  The monks truly had made Dawn out of Buffy.

"Dawn, there's…there's something you should know," Giles said, moving over to the table to take a seat with her.

The teenager dropped the pencil she had been holding onto the table.  She felt her heart sink in her chest and could only wonder what other torture fate had decided to send to her.

"What is it?" she asked, worriedly.  "Are you okay?  The gang, they're okay, right?"

Giles gave a small laugh and nodded, calming the teenagers fears.  "Everyone's fine.  There's…there's someone who wants to see you though."

Dawn looked at him with renewed interest.  "Who?  Not my dad, right, cos…you'd probably be acting a little more British."

Giles laughed and shook his head.  "No, much better than that, believe me.  Maybe you should go over to Spike's crypt yourself."

"Spike wants to see me?" Dawn asked.

Giles shrugged mysteriously.  "You'll want to see him too, I imagine.  He's got some company."

Dawn looked at the older man, her sister's Watcher suspiciously.  Without warning, she reached over and put two fingers against his neck.

"What are you doing?" Giles asked.

"Checking for a pulse," she replied.  "You're giving me the wiggins."

Giles rolled his eyes a little.  "Just go.  You won't regret it."

Dawn nodded, still a little suspicious of Giles' behaviour.  "Alright, but if I wake up dead, I'm blaming you."

________________________

Dawn opened the door to the crypt slowly, poking her head through the opening.  She glanced around the dark room, her eyes adjusting to the light.  There were a few candles that adorned the room, casting an eerie glow on the furniture.

"Spike?" she called.

She stepped inside, feeling inside her pocket for the cross that she had carried with her since she was thirteen years old.

She stopped when she saw the rumpled bed clothes.  She heard laughter coming from the lower part of the crypt.  A woman's laughter.

She felt her heart drop, even though she was getting over her crush on Spike.  She had still had a vague hope that maybe he would see her as something more than a little sister.  But it didn't matter, she had her new almost semi-romance with Kevin to make up for Spike's obliviousness.

She made her way down to the bottom level of the crypt and saw Spike's face light up as he saw her enter.

"Nibblet, hey," he said, standing and walking over to her.

Dawn looked past him towards the woman who sat on the couch, her back to Dawn.

"Who's your friend?" Dawn asked, trying to keep the hurt out of her voice.

Spike grinned.  "An old friend.  I think you'll like her."

Dawn stared at him, swallowing deeply.  An old friend?  A vampire friend, or…she didn't really want to think.

She gasped as his 'friend' turned to look at her.

Dawn rushed over to her, embracing her tightly.  "Buffy, oh my god!  How…how is this possible?" 

Buffy hugged her younger sister tightly, thankful that Dawn had seen her in private and not in the public display that was sure to happen at the Magic Box.

"Long story short, the Powers that Be kinda like me, so they said I could come back.  Kinda like a good behaviour bond or something," Buffy explained, unable to control the smile that had spread across her face.

She had dreamt all day about what it would be like to see her sister again, but it had never been this good, or this real.

Dawn hugged her sister again, tears rolling down her cheeks.  "Buffy, I missed you so much!  It hurt so much…"

"I know Dawnie.  But I'm back now.  It's okay."

Spike cleared his throat from behind them and the two Summers' girls looked at him, smiling from ear to ear.  The sight of their grins was enough to make Spike begin smiling himself.  

"Come on, Giles is expecting us," he said.

Buffy grinned and linked arms with Dawn.  

"This will be priceless."

~*~

The trio entered the Magic Box, Dawn and Buffy still arm-in-arm with Spike lingering behind them a little, smiling at the sight of the two sisters who had been reunited.

Giles looked up and smiled as he saw the three enter.  He stepped forward to hug his Slayer once more, still a little unsure that this wasn't a dream.  He was sure he would wake up at any moment to find himself alone in his apartment.

"Hey Giles," she whispered.

He smiled at her and looked towards Dawn.  "And you thought I was trying to kill you."

Dawn laughed and rolled her eyes, unable to hide her smile.  It seemed that the smiling was contagious in all areas, as Spike was still wielding his grin.

Buffy walked over to the table and sat down, unconsciously reaching for one of Dawn's books.  

"Harry Potter?  Are these any good?" she asked her sister.

Dawn's jaw dropped with pure shock.  

"Tell me you're joking!  These books are…incredible.  Read them, you won't be able to put them down," Dawn said.

Buffy smiled and replaced the book on the table.  

She looked towards Giles who was still staring at her in disbelief.  "Giles, I'm not in a fish tank.  Stop it."

He looked away sheepishly and took off his glasses nervously.

"I'm sorry Buffy.  It's all just a little…overwhelming really." 

She smiled, wondering how he could take her so seriously all the time.  

"So…where are the others?" Dawn asked.

"I gave Anya some time to see Xander.  They have some things to work out, but…I'm sure they'll be fine.  Willow, Tara and Amy said they'd be here by six fifteen at the latest."

"How is Amy anyway?" Buffy asked.

"A little disorientated, but…she's coping," Giles said.

"Being a rat for three years tends to do that to a person," Spike quipped.

Buffy smiled, remembering her own experience as a rat.  "I wonder if she still likes cheese anymore."

Dawn grinned and poked her sister in the ribs.  "If she does, she can just knick your's…cheese freak."

Buffy mock glared at her younger sister, wishing she hadn't told her about her obsession for cheese.  She had almost maimed Willow for telling Riley that she liked it.

The door opened and in walked the group of five.  

"Hey guys.  Did we miss anything interesting?" Willow asked from the rear of the group.

Spike tried not to grin.  "Yeah a couple of things.  You know, raising the dead and that sort of stuff."

There was a slight pause, but the group hadn't yet realised that they were one member over their last member count.

"Giles, did I leave my Magick book here, there was this spell I was looking into, and…oh my god!" Willow exclaimed.

Tara looked towards her girlfriend, silently questioning what was wrong.

"You fixed it?" Willow cried, glaring accusingly at Spike.  "How could you?  That is so tactless."

"Fixed what, Will?" Xander asked.

Willow pointed to where Buffy sat at the table, an amused look on her face.

"Gah!" he yelled, jumping back a little. 

Dawn giggled a little and grinned at her sister.

Buffy stood up and walked over to the group.  Tara looked at her curiously, obviously searching her aura.

"Uh…guys…that's not the robot," Tara said.

Three sets of eyes widened simultaneously.  Buffy could only smile.

"Hey guys.  Miss me?"

~*~

There was a complete rush as Willow and Xander ran quickly, hugging her to them tightly, reluctant to let go when she begged to be let to breathe.

"How is this possible?" Willow asked, her eyes never leaving Buffy's.

Buffy shrugged a little and took her best friend by the hand, leading her to the table.  She sat down in the seat in front of where Spike stood, not even flinching when Spike rested his hands against the back of her chair, his fingers brushing her shoulder.

"Powers that Be sent me back," she explained.

"The Powers that Be?" Amy repeated.  "Wow…they must really like you."

Buffy gave a small shrug and looked towards Xander who was still staring at her in disbelief.  She smiled softly at him, thankful that she had chosen to return.

"The whole, dying to save the world gig kinda got you a few points in the plus column, huh pet?" Spike asked.

Buffy leant back against him, her head resting against his stomach.

"Either that or they just didn't want you up there," he teased.

She looked up, poking her tongue out at him.  He grinned, unable to contain his smile.  

"And yet they let you stay up there," she retorted.  

Dawn looked at her sister curiously.  "Huh?"

"Oh…Spike's soul, William…he was up there too," Buffy explained.

"Up where?" Xander asked.

Buffy looked at him, trying to form the right answer.  "I don't know for sure.  It was nice.  Heaven maybe…if you believe in it."

"You were in heaven, but you came back here?" Dawn asked.  

Buffy nodded, giving her sister a soft smile.  "Was kinda lonely without all of you guys."

The gang smiled, but Dawn still looked troubled.

"Was…was mom up there?" Dawn whispered.

Buffy smiled and nodded, gently squeezing her sister's hand.

"She told me to take good care of you," Buffy replied.

Dawn smiled and felt a stab of pain in her heart, wishing that she had had a chance to see her mom again.

"She's happy where she is.  And she's got Will to keep her company," Buffy said, grinning a little at Spike.

"I wonder if he likes the little marshmallows as much as I do," Spike commented.

Dawn grinned, and Buffy was glad that Spike had broken the tension a little.

"So…what's the what?" Buffy asked, hoping that the new evil in town wouldn't be as hard to beat as Glory had been.  

Giles cleared his throat before trying to explain.

"There's a new Master vampire in the town.  Court Sams.  He's calling forth a demon to make himself into a demon," Giles said.

Buffy looked at him vaguely.  "He doesn't like being all hybridy?"

Spike gave a small laugh and playfully poked the Slayer's ribs.  "Watch who you're calling a crossbreed."

"You?  Half-mongrel, half-mosquito?" Buffy quipped.

Dawn grinned, still amazed that her sister was back with them.  

Spike looked insulted by her mongrel/mosquito insult.

"Anyway," Giles said, drawing his Slayer's attention back to the topic, "Court is calling forth Yhidnamanna in order to turn himself into a Korickana demon."

Buffy's eyes widened.  "A Korick demon?  You're kidding me."

Giles raised his eyebrows, wondering when his Slayer had had time to research into a Korick demon.

"No…no, we wish we were kidding," Giles replied.

"Alright…so this Yhidnamanna demon…does Court have his sacrifices yet?" Buffy asked.

"How do you know so bloody much about this pet?" Spike asked.

Buffy shrugged.  "It's amazing what you learn when Giles makes you read lots of boring books."

"I thought you never read them," Giles protested.

"Not when you asked me to, no.  Besides, some of it was kinda interesting."

Giles shook his head, knowing that no matter what, he would never be able to keep up to speed with his charge.

"As far as we know, Court doesn't have his sacrifices.  There hasn't been any reports of missing persons.  He's gathering together minions to get sacrifices.  We think that he'll be performing the ritual sometime soon," Giles said.

"Court's not one to have sacrifices hanging around for days on end," Anya said.  "Plus the vamps tend to get hungry, and with so many humans around, they start snacking, which means that Yhidnamanna won't accept them as pure."

"Okay, so if Court's going to be speedy with the ritual, whenever there's a surge of people going missing, we'll know that we won't have long to act.  Which means we should try to take down Court before he gets his sacrifices.  He only needs five," Buffy said.  'Six with the key,'Buffy thought to herself.

"So…we need to know when he's going to call Yhidnamanna.  If we don't stop him from becoming a Korick, we'll never stop him," Buffy said.

"Unless Yhiddy kills the Korick demon for us," Spike said.

"I'm guessing he's not gonna do that any time soon," Xander offered.

Buffy looked towards Giles.  "Okay, so do we have any plans?"

Giles shook his head and rubbed his eyes tiredly.  "None as such.  Spike's trying to work on the inside with Court.  Anya and Court were acquainted in the 1600's, so she's been getting some very helpful information from him on that."

Buffy nodded and tried to think.  "Well, I guess I'm up for patrolling.  See if we can get Court's minions down to a bare minimum.  Plus let them know that this town is no longer Slayerless.  I'm back, and they will play by my rules."

~*~

Buffy, Spike and Dawn had left the Magic shop to go back to the Summers' home, allowing Buffy and Dawn to catch up with each other.  The rest of the group was still in the store, a silence in the room as each of them thought about what had happened this evening.

Xander yelped as he pinched his arm.  

"Xander!  What are you doing?" Anya asked.

"Just making sure this is real.  I didn't just dream that Buffy was in here did I?" he asked.

Willow smiled and squeezed Tara's hand.  "No.  You didn't."

Xander smiled and sighed with relief.  "Thank God.  I don't think I could have taken it, waking up and finding out that this had just been one of my very, very realistic dreams."

"I know what you mean," Giles said, sitting himself down at the table.

"She didn't…she didn't have to like…crawl up through her grave, did she?" Anya asked.

Willow looked towards Giles, terrified at the notion.

"No.  No, she didn't.  Spike said she was just on top of her grave, kicking at the headstone.  She was…a little upset."

"Upset?  Why?" Willow asked.

Giles shook his head.  "She didn't say.  Spike said that she was yelling and screaming.  She hit him a few times as well."

"So?  All is right with the world then," Xander said.  "Buffy's alive.  She's kicking Spike's ass.  Dawn's got her family back.  I think this calls for a celebration."

Giles nodded thoughtfully before Willow turned to him, noting his look.  "What is it?"

"Oh, I was just thinking…she's going to have some things to work through.  If…if what Spike said about her being upset when she first got back, then I'd say she's not entirely over something.  I'm not sure what it is, but…I'm fairly certain that she's hurting right now."

"She seemed pretty alright before.  Taking charge of everything like that.  It was just like normal," Willow said.

"Exactly," Xander agreed.  "It'll take more than dying to kill her."

­­­­­­________________________

Buffy gently pushed a strand of hair from Dawn's face and kissed her young sister's forehead lovingly.  

"Sleep tight," she whispered before turning to leave Dawn's dark bedroom.

"Buffy?" 

Buffy turned and smiled in the shadows. 

"Yeah?"

"This isn't a dream, is it?" Dawn asked sleepily.

Buffy gave a small laugh and smiled gently, feeling her heart fill with love for the young girl who had been made from her own flesh.  

"No. It's not a dream.  I'm back.  And I'm not going anywhere.  It'll be like before.  Just you and me," Buffy said, gently giving Dawn's hand a gentle squeeze.

Buffy let go of Dawn's hand and left, closing the door gently behind her.  

Buffy sighed and made her way downstairs to the kitchen where Spike was sitting on the bench.

He looked up as she walked in and smiled at her.  

"What?" she asked.

He shook his head and reluctantly looked away.

"I'm just…I'm waiting to wake up I guess."

Buffy smiled and jumped up on the counter, next to him.

"I've been getting a lot of that lately," she said.

He smiled and closed his eyes, his entire body begging for sleep.

"I guess if this was a dream, you and I would have been in my crypt anyway.  And I would have been kissing you by now."

Buffy choked a little and looked at him sharply.  "Come again?"

He grinned sheepishly and tilted his head to the side.  "It's just, this entire week, I've been dreaming about you, and it's always been in the one spot.  That was in my crypt.  That and you haven't told me to wait for you yet."

"To wait for me?" she repeated.

He nodded.  "Always in my dream, you tell me to wait for you.  It's like part of me knew you were coming back somehow."

"I just…I don't understand…wait for me?  Were you…you weren't going to leave were you?" she asked.

He nodded once more.  "I was thinking of it.  And then this whole Yhidnamanna thing came up, and the Scoobies actually needed me."

Buffy nodded silently, trying to work out her feelings.  If he had have gone…it would have hurt her more than she cared to admit, even to herself.

"You…you're not planning on leaving now, are you?" Buffy asked.

Spike looked at her, trying to work out what exactly she meant by that comment.  When he smelt the tiniest tinge of fear, he knew that she wasn't asking him to leave.

"Are you kidding me?  You're not getting' rid of me that easily," he said.

Buffy breathed a sigh of relief and hopped off the kitchen counter.

"So…you up for patrolling?" she asked.

"Buffy…you don't have to do that tonight.  I'll do a sweep.  You shouldn't have to do this…not tonight," he said.

"Tonight's not going to be any different than tomorrow night Spike.  I know…I'm back.  Things are gonna be a bit different, but…I need to do this."

Spike nodded, understanding completely.

"You want back-up?"

~*~

Buffy walked silently through the cemetery that she had been buried in, Spike at her side.  There was a silence upon them that neither could discern whether it was awkward or completely natural.

Buffy spun quickly as she heard something behind her, her stake held at the ready.  She relaxed as she saw a cat run across the graveyard.

"Bit jumpy?" Spike asked.

Buffy shrugged and turned back around.  "Just a bit off, that's all."

Spike nodded, unsure of how to respond to that comment.  "I'm sure you'll get the hang of it again."

"I know.  Once I get into a fight, I'll be fine," she said.

They continued walking, checking for disturbed gravesites.  

"Maybe we should split up," Buffy suggested.

Spike hesitated for a moment but eventually nodded his agreement.  "Sure.  Wouldn't be good if Christian saw me with you anyway."

"Christian?" Buffy asked.

"Court's right hand man.  Bout ye high," Spike said, indicating a little above shoulder height.  "Looks about fifteen.  Nasty bugger.  He's stronger than he looks."

Buffy nodded, making a mental note to remember what he had told her.

"Meet back at the entrance in an hour, yeah?" 

"Right.  Be careful," Spike said.

Buffy nodded, surprised by the concern in his voice.  "You too." 

It was no more than two minutes after they had split up before a vampire jumped out of the shadows at the Slayer.

She stepped back startled, almost having forgotten exactly what her duty meant.  It seemed so long ago that she had been slaying vampires.  She hadn't had to worry about that when she was in the nether realm where only things that were pure and good could exist.

"Awww, little girlie's all scared," the vamp taunted.

A second vamp came from behind him, joining the other vampire at his side.  The second vamp looked no older than fifteen.  Christian.

She carefully hid her stake on the inside of the arm of her jacket, a plan formulating in his mind already.

"W-what are you?" Buffy asked, trying her best to look scared.  It didn't come entirely naturally to the Slayer, but they didn't need to know that.

"Monsters," Christian replied.  "We're everything you have nightmares about."

Buffy somehow managed to contain her laughter, wondering where this boy-vamp had learned arrogance mixed with many annoying qualities.

The first vampire stepped towards her, Buffy frozen in her place.  He reached out to touch her neck and Buffy flinched a little, though her reaction was not entirely pretence.

"You hungry?" the vamp asked Christian.

Christian grinned back and stepped forward, going to pat the first vamp's back, but finding himself running his hand through dust falling to the ground.

Christian took a step back, fear in his eyes.

"Guess he wasn't that hungry after all.  All that stake," Buffy said.

"Slayer," he spat.

Buffy smiled and tilted her head to the side proudly.  "Good guess."

"You're dead!" he cried

"Looked in the mirror lately?  Oh…wait.  Sorry.  My bad."

Christian glared at her with contempt.  "You are of no consequence to us.  More will come."

"So I've been told.  Doesn't really stop me killing you guys." 

"I'll enjoy killing you," Christian said, still inching backwards.

"That line just gets older and older every time I hear it," Buffy said.

She lunged forward quickly, holding Christian at the throat, his back against a grave.

"Tell you what, you're gonna be my messenger," Buffy said, pushing him against the cement headstone.  "You're gonna go back, and you're gonna tell whoever you're working for that you're playing on my turf now."

~*~

"You okay?" Spike asked as he saw Buffy coming towards him.

"I'm fine.  Everything's good.  One vamp went poof, the other went to tell his boss that I'm back in the game.  He was that Christian guy you were talking about," Buffy said.

"Nasty bloke, ain't he?"

Buffy shrugged and began walking towards her house.  "Not really.  He was really arrogant though.  And really annoying.  It kinda made me wonder who taught him, cause…whoever it was, it wouldn't surprise me if they're dust now."

Spike was silent for a moment, before finally speaking the truth to her.  "They're not."

"How do you-" she stopped.  "Oh."

"It was a few years back.  I was kinda pissed off at something, and…it wasn't really meant to happen that way."

"No…it's cool.  I mean…yeah-"

"Buffy-"

"I shoulda…I mean, it was-"

"Buffy-" 

He grabbed her by the shoulders, making her stop and turn to look at him.  She shrugged him off and kept walking.

He grabbed her wrist, trying to force her eyes to look into his.

"Buffy… you know what I was.  You know what I did.  I'm not like that anymore."

Buffy looked down and breathed in deeply.  "I know.  I just…forget sometimes."

He touched her face gently, holding in an un-needed breath.

"I know what you mean.  You make me forget.  You make me feel like…like I never died at all," he admitted.

She pulled away from him, uncomfortable with their sudden bout of honesty.  She and William had told each other everything, but she knew she had to realise that Spike and William were two completely different men.

"But you did.  And…I have to remember that."

"Why?" he asked.  "Why do you have to remember that?"

She glared at him, hurt by his question.  "Do you even need to ask?"

"If you won't answer, then I'll just guess.  You've cooked up a million reasons, haven't you?  About why you and I are so completely wrong for each other.  Well, for every one of those reasons, I would bet you my unlife that I could give you one reason why we should."

"You're dead," she cried.

"You're alive.  Opposites attract."

He smiled as he saw her laugh a little.

"You're a vampire."

"And you're the Slayer.  Notice how those words go so well together.  Vampire Slayer.  You can't separate them.  Just like you can't make me go away."

"I never said I wanted you to go away," Buffy replied defensively.

Spike grinned at her inadvertent admission.  

"How's this, the last time I let myself fall for a vampire, he turned evil and started trying to kill all my friends," Buffy said.

"I'm not Angelus," he said simply.  "I don't have a soul, thank you very much.  What you see is what you get."

 She smiled a little, despite herself.  She wanted to stay detached, knowing that no matter what she felt for him, it could never work between them.  But she couldn't.

"I like what I see."


	8. Chapter Seven: Visions

CHAPTER SEVEN: VISIONS 

Anya looked up as she heard the door to the Magic Box open.  She smiled as she saw Willow and Tara enter.

"Hey," they greeted.  "Is Giles around?"

Anya nodded and pointed to the back room, next to Buffy's training room.

Willow walked in that direction, leaving Tara behind.   Willow knocked gently on the door and entered.  

Giles hadn't noticed her enter the room, too wrapped up in his reading.  Willow coughed softly, disturbing him from his reverie.

"Uh…Willow.  Wh-what can I do for you?" he asked, still a little startled by her presence.

"Nothing.  Just wanted to make sure you're okay.  So…are you?  Okay, I mean."  
"Quite, thank you," he replied, looking back down at his diaries from five years ago.  He had started reading from the beginning of his life as Buffy's Watcher and had been somewhat guilty for writing that he had thought she would last only a few months.

She had proven him wrong of course, twice now.   

"What'cha reading?" Willow asked quietly, taking the seat next to him.

He handed her his first Watcher's Diary.

"Slayer is wilful and insolent.  Her abuse of the English language is such that I understand only every other sentence," Willow read.  She laughed a little and smiled at Buffy's surrogate father.

"This doesn't make you a bad person you know," Willow said.

He nodded and rubbed his eyes tiredly.  "Just…it's rather embarrassing really.  For someone who's supposed to be completely detached from her, I'd say that I failed in that area."

"Buffy's a hard person not to like.  I mean, she's had two vampires fall for her, so that has to be saying something.  Plus, even Wesley got attached to her in his own stuffy way," Willow explained.

"That's true.  He was rather upset when he was fired," Giles said.  "And it wasn't just because he no longer had a job."

"See?  So, it's not your fault at all," she encouraged.

He smiled, thankful for the young witches efforts to comfort him.

"Do you…you think she'll be alright, don't you?" she asked.

He shrugged silently, hoping against hope that she would be fine.  The first time she had died, she hadn't dealt with it properly and had pent up her frustrations and anger and fear within herself.

"As long as she talks to someone, she should be fine," he said.

"Should I try and get her to talk to me?"

"Possibly.  She could just need a bit of time.  I'd imagine that she's a little confused.  Torn between two things.  Returning, even though she wanted to, can't have been easy.  Giving up perfection to come back here…I don't care how strong she is, she will regret it in some ways."

­________________________

Buffy walked into the kitchen, her head throbbing with too many thoughts.  Spike had said his good-nights a few minutes earlier and Buffy couldn't help but notice how awkward his departure was.

She'd had first dates drop her at the door with less awkwardness.

They had stared at each other in silence, both of them uncomfortable and unsure of what the other wanted.  Buffy had a fair idea what Spike wanted, but she was too unsure of what she wanted.

Spike had eventually left, turning away from her gaze, unable to hold eye-contact any longer.

Buffy sighed and closed her eyes, leaning her forehead against the coolness of the refrigerator.  

"You okay?" asked a voice behind her.

She jumped, startled by the other person's presence.

"You startled me," she told her sister.

"Sorry.  I just heard you come in," Dawn explained.

"I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to wake you up," Buffy said.

Dawn shrugged and shook her head.  "Not like I could really sleep anyway, I'm too afraid to sleep."

"Afraid?" Buffy asked.

"You know…if this ends up being a dream.  If I don't go to sleep, I can't wake up," Dawn explained.

Buffy smiled and touched Dawn's shoulder gently, running her hands through the young girl's hair.

"This can't be easy for you," Buffy said quietly.

"Compared to the week we've just had, this week's gone pretty well so far," Dawn said, a smile dancing around her lips.

"You wanna stay in my room?  That way when you wake up, I'll still be there," Buffy offered.

Dawn nodded, grateful that Buffy had suggested what she was about to ask for.

"Thanks," Dawn whispered.

"S'okay.  I'm just gonna be down here for a few more minutes.  I'll be up in a sec," she said.

"Cool."  With that, Dawn turned and left the kitchen, trudging up the stairs towards Buffy's room.

Buffy sighed and ran her hands through her hair.  She looked upwards, staring blankly at the ceiling.

"How could you leave me here like this?" she whispered.  "I trusted you!"

~*~

Dawn stretched tiredly as she woke up, feeling a little disorientated.  She rubbed at her eyes and saw that she was in Buffy's room.

She quickly rolled over, making sure that her sister was still beside her and that last night hadn't been a dream at all.  When she saw her sister's long blonde hair, she knew without a doubt that this couldn't be a dream.  Buffy was back, and she was back for the long haul.

Buffy stirred a little as she felt her younger sister moving in the bed, and groaned as she sat up.

"Morning," Buffy said tiredly, the greeting sounding completely natural to them both, even though there had been a week or more where neither of them could speak to each other.

"Morning," Dawn replied, a smile coming to her face.

"You sleep okay?" Buffy asked.

"Like a rock," Dawn answered.

Buffy smiled and stood up, wiping the sleep from her eyes.  She smiled as Dawn groaned a little, trying to stretch out her cramped muscles.

"What day is it?" she asked.

"Saturday," Buffy replied.  "Which means no school.  Not that I would have made you go today in any case, but…now you've got a valid excuse."

Dawn smiled and got out of the bed, both girls wandering down to the kitchen.  Buffy immediately headed towards the fridge and retrieved some juice, pouring a glass for both herself and her sister.

"So what have you got planned for the day?" Buffy asked.

"Well, I was going to go to a friend's house, but I think I may just spend the day with you, cos…well, it's kinda obvious," Dawn said.

Buffy smiled, thankful that she could spend the day with what was left of her family.

"I was thinking we could head up to the Magic Box, see what the Gang's got planned.  Maybe research more into this whole demon thing," Buffy suggested.

"Yeah, sounds good." 

­________________________

"Hey Will," Buffy greeted as the door closed behind her.

Willow looked up and grinned.  "Hey Buffy.  How's things?" 

"Alive and kicking.  Both things that I kinda enjoy," she quipped.

Buffy looked up as she saw Giles head out from the storage room.  He smiled as he saw her and walked towards where she stood.

He held out something in his hands and gave it to her.

"Welcome home," he said.

She smiled at him, a little confused.  "We already did the welcoming thing.  And what are these for?" she asked, holding up the set of keys that he had given to her.

He pointed to the back room, her training area.

"When you…left, I locked the room up.  I wouldn't let anyone in there if they weren't you.  Now…it's yours again." 

She smiled, thankful that Giles had been so sentimental about her training room that Giles, Riley and Xander had prepared for her so long ago.

"Thank you," she whispered, her eyes tearing over a little.

Giles smiled and touched her shoulder gently.

"If you don't mind, I might go and…get back into it," she said.

________________________

Dawn sat quietly on the sofa to the side of the room, watching her older sister train.  The only other times when she'd really been allowed to stay and watch was when Buffy had been doing meditation exercises.  She'd never really been allowed to watch any physical action.

She was beginning to understand why.

The sheer brutality that Buffy was using to pound the punching bag was astounding, and from what Dawn had briefly witnessed when Buffy was killing Glory, what she was seeing now was no-where near the full strength that Buffy had.

Dawn saw Giles in the corner of her eye, standing in the doorframe, unseen by her older sister.  She watched as his expression grew more concerned for his charge, and only then did Dawn realise why he looked so worried.

As Buffy hit and kicked and punched, she was beginning to let tears flow from her eyes, going unnoticed by the Slayer.  The sounds coming from her mouth were no longer soft grunts, but yells that were getting increasingly louder.

It was only then that Dawn heard that Buffy was yelling at someone, and she knew that it wasn't at anyone in the room.

"You jerk!" Each word pronounced as she hit the bag, the weight of the words was brutal, the pain in them apparent.  "I…trusted…you!!"

Dawn watched as Giles slowly made his way over to Buffy, moving slowly in case he frightened her and she hit him with complete Slayer strength.

He put a hand gently on her shoulder and for a moment, Dawn thought that Buffy hadn't even noticed the touch.  She then saw her sister stop, her body begin to sag and it took extremely quick reflexes from Giles to stop her from collapsing to the ground.

Dawn was on her feet in lightening speed, rushing to where Giles was keeping her sister standing.

Without a word between them, Dawn and Giles helped Buffy to the couch, making her sit down and rest.  Dawn held her hand silently while Giles raced out of the room and returned within moments, carrying a blanket and a wet washcloth.

Dawn sniffled a little but quickly forced her tears back, knowing that however hard this was for her, it was ten times more so for Buffy.  As long as nothing major happened in the next few days, Dawn knew that, somehow, Buffy would be alright.

~*~

Angel stepped into the main downstairs area of the hotel and looked towards the large blanket-covered lump lying on the sofa.  He smiled as he saw the short blonde-streaked brunette sleeping quietly.  

He walked towards the bed and shook her shoulder gently.  "Cordy?"

She looked up at him in confusion.  "Angel?"

He nodded and helped her to sit up.

"You okay?" he asked.

She nodded and looked away from his intense stare.

"I just needed to get away from Wesley for a while," she explained.

"Why?"

Cordelia gave a small shrug.  "He's just…mopey.  And…I'm so sick of being mopey."

"He does have a valid reason for it," Angel said.

"His reasons not even half as good as yours, and you're not all silent and brooding.  Well, no more than usual," Cordelia said bluntly.

"Cordy-"

Cordelia screamed out in pain, her hand going up to her head to try and relieve the pain of the mind-shattering vision that was coming to her.

Angel rushed to her side, helping her sit on the bed.  He handed her a pad of paper and a pen to write what she saw.  

As the vision subsided she looked at him, confusion written on her face.

"What is it?" he asked.

She shook her head, her hand clutching at her heart.  "It's…it's impossible."

"What?  What did you see?" Angel asked firmly.

"I saw Buffy.  Alive.  In Sunnydale."

~*~

"Remind me again why Giles wanted us to split up," Buffy said to Spike, holding her trusty stake at the ready.

"He reckons that it's easier for the slaying, and because," Spike cleared his throat and stood up straight, putting on an even more British air about him, "It's imperative to the cause that you are not seen together."

Buffy laughed and shook her head. 

"Which is what you said last night, only…less stuffy."

"So, we'll meet up in an hour," Spike said.

"Same place as last night."

Spike nodded and watched as she walked away from him. He sighed softly and walked in the opposite direction.

Things had been different since she had been back, and she had only been back for a day.  For one thing, the Nibblet couldn't have been happier about things.  Giles was actually smiling for the first time in days.  Willow and the whelp had been shocked but they were definitely glad to have her back.

Spike stopped walking and listened carefully as he heard a noise coming from in front of him.  "Show yourself," he called.

Christian stepped from the shadows into the light that was coming from a street lamp.

"Christian," Spike greeted. "How's things on the home front?"

"Fine.  Court wants things to start soon.  He'll probably want to see you tomorrow.  He wants us to retrieve the Key for him," Christian said.

Spike growled extremely softly and quickly composed himself. 

"Just tell me the time and place.  I say, the sooner the better.  I want this bloody chip out of my head," Spike said.

Christian nodded and looked over his shoulder. 

"We'll be in touch, don't worry.  It should all go down tomorrow night.  And with the Slayer out of commission, it will be even easier," Christian said.

"The Slayer?" Spike asked, his unbeating heart contracting.

"Oh, she's back from the dead or something.  But we'll be putting her back in the ground tonight.  Of course, she'll rise again though," Christian said, grinning.

"You're making the Slayer one of us?" Spike asked incredulously.

"Brilliant isn't it?  Court wanted someone strong, and who would be stronger than the Slayer?"

Spike nodded, trying to stop himself from being sick at the thought of Buffy becoming like him.

"Where are they?" he asked, grabbing Christian's shoulders and shaking them roughly.

Christian pulled out of his grasp and straightened his clothing.

"You're not worried are you?" Christian asked with disgust.

Spike shook his head, his demon showing on his face.  "No.  I just want to watch."

Christian grinned and vamped out.  "They're about fifty feet in that direction.  As for me, I'd love to stick around and watch, but I've got my own kill to make."

________________________

Buffy moved away from where she knew Spike was standing watching her.  She breathed a deep breath and looked over her shoulder, thankful that he had finally left.

It was interesting that he and Dawn were the only ones who had really tried to make things normal for her.  Even though they were both afraid that they would wake up at any moment, they had obviously decided to savour the dreams they believed they were living in.

Willow and Xander, while they had been great were still a little uncomfortable around her.  She couldn't blame them though.

She quickly stopped walking and whirled around, her stake at the ready.  She couldn't see anyone in the shadows, but her Slayer senses were kicking in.

"I am so not in the mood for games tonight.  Show yourself," Buffy called.

From out of the shadows stepped three vampires.  Buffy stepped back a little but quickly readied herself for the fight.

"I can do three," she whispered to herself.

As they stepped forward, she saw three more vampires coming towards her from the side.  She swallowed nervously and hesitated only a moment before attacking the first three.

She easily dusted one, ducking punches from the other two.  She easily kicked the second vamp away, his head hitting a headstone with a loud crack.  The third vamp lunged at her from the front as two from the second group did the same.

She struggled and flipped out of their grasp, kicking one in the face, hearing the crack of his nose breaking.  While he was clutching his nose, she thrust her stake into his heart.  

She felt her arm being pulled from the side, and before she knew what was happening, she had been pushed face-forward against a tree.  She struggled to no avail and felt her heart beat quicken, not wanting to die this way.

The stake was pulled out of her hand and she was roughly turned around to see three vamps standing around her, licking their bloodied lips.

Two vamps held her sides and the third advanced towards her, his hand reaching out to touch her face gently.  She flinched away from him and went to scream for Spike to help her, but before she had a chance, the vamps hand had struck her across the face.

She would have fallen from the blow except for the fact that she was being held up by the two other minions.

"You're going to die tonight Slayer," he said, his face only centimeters from her face, their noses touching.  "You've come back once, and you'll come back again.  But this time, you're not gonna be killing us.  You'll be killing them."

Buffy tried to back away but was stuck between three vamps and the tree that was pressing uncomfortably into her back.

She closed her eyes, silently apologising to her sister for not being able to keep her promise.

She felt the nameless vamps fangs pressing into her neck and she gasped as he began to drink from her.  Her head felt lighter and her thoughts became less and less as she felt herself beginning to fall into unconsciousness.

"Not so fast Slayer, don't die on us yet," she heard.  "You've still gotta have a taste."

The two vamps holding her back suddenly let go and she fell to the ground, struggling to stay alive.  She heard a faraway 'whump' and realised that one of the vamps had been dusted.  

She tried to open her eyes, but they were too heavy to be opened.

She heard another two dustings and felt her body finally relax, knowing that she could at least die with some dignity.  Being turned would have been the ultimate victory for any vampire over a Slayer.

She felt someone pulling at her arms, trying to help her to her feet.  She tried to stand but found that she was leaning heavily on her saviour.

Her knees buckled and she fell forward into her rescuers arms.

Spike held her close to him and stroked her hair gently.

"It's okay luv.  I won't let them hurt you."

~*~

Angel burst into the Magic Box, startling the Scooby Gang.

"Angel," Giles said, the surprise in his voice obvious.

"Where is she?" Angel yelled, his demon showing and disappearing every few seconds.

Willow gasped softly, realising that no one had told Angel that Buffy was back.

"She's patrolling," Willow offered.  "Angel-"

"Why didn't you tell me she was back?!  She's in trouble," Angel cried.

Giles stood up, slowly approaching the upset vampire.

"Angel, she only came back yesterday.  We've been a little…overwhelmed.  I'm sorry you weren't told-" Giles stopped as Angel interrupted him.

"Where did she go?" Angel asked, trying to calm himself down.

"Go?" Giles repeated.

"Patrolling!  Where did she go?  She's in trouble!" 

"She was going on her usual route.  She'd be in Restfield.  And yes, she did go alone."

Angel was out the door, racing towards the cemetery before Giles could even finish his sentence.

"He has got to stay off the caffeine," Xander commented.

Willow stood up and walked to where Giles was still staring at the door.

"Giles, what do you think he meant by Buffy being in trouble?" she asked.

He shook his head, not knowing the answer to her question. 

"Shouldn't we go and…help her out?" Tara asked.

Giles looked to where Dawn was curled up on a bean-bag, somehow managing to sleep through Angels screaming fit.

"Someone needs to stay here with Dawn," Giles said.

Tara nodded.  "I'll watch her."

"Me too," Amy offered.

Giles nodded and looked towards Willow, Xander and Anya. "Let's go."

~*~ 

Spike's face hovered closely above Buffy's, his eyes filling with tears.  He brought his hand up to the uninjured side of her neck and felt for her pulse, surprised to find that it was stronger than most people's would have been after being nearly completely drained.  Her breathing was steady.

Spike knew that her Slayer healing was working its magic, and thankfully she would be back in action soon.

Her eyes fluttered open and Spike smiled softly at her.  He let her lean against him, her knees still shaking, his arms never leaving her waist.

"Tell me what happened luv," Spike said softly, hugging her body closer to his.

"Vampires.  They surrounded me.  They…they were going to-" she stopped, unable to bring herself to say it.

Spike hugged her tightly in his arms, her body wracking with sobs.

"Hey, it's okay," he whispered.  "They're gone."

"Thanks to you," she said softly.

"How many were there?" Spike asked.

"Six," she admitted, a little ashamed that she hadn't been able to take the down herself.

"Slayer, you can't forget that you aren't at your full strength."

She nodded, still embarrassed that she had almost been turned by a minion, not even a master.

He wiped a tear from her eyes and gently kissed her forehead.  She sighed softly and leant her head on his shoulder.

He bent his own head to her shoulder, smelling the blood on her neck but feeling not even the slightest inclination to taste her.

He felt himself being ripped away from her, a fist connecting with his face before he could even see who was attacking him.  He looked to where Buffy was and saw that she was looking on in horror but was too weak to stop him from being attacked.

He tried to look at his attacker, but only saw a foot connecting with his face.  He quickly rolled away and grabbed the offending foot, pulling it's owner to the ground.

Spike quickly got the upper hand and was on top of his attacker, punching the face blindly.

"Stop it!" he heard Buffy yell loudly.

With what little strength the Slayer had left, she pulled Spike off his attacker and helped him to stand up.

His attacker stood up and Spike finally saw who had pulled him away from the Slayer.

"Angelus," he growled.

Angel looked at Spike, both of their demon faces showing, both of them looking as though the only way they would stop fighting would be when one of them was dust.

Buffy looked towards Angel in disgust. 

"What is it with you?" she asked him.  "This is the second time you've done this!"

"Done what?" Angel asked in confusion.

"Come to beat up on my boyfri-" Buffy stopped, realising what she was about to say. 

Spike and Angel looked at her, their eyes open wide.  Spike's demon immediately resided.

"What?" 

"What?!" Angel yelled.

"I didn't mean…well, I didn't mean 'boyfriend' per-say," Buffy stuttered.

"Well, what did you mean?" Angel yelled.

"Yeah, what did you mean?" Spike asked.  His voice was softer, more gentle than the older vampires.

Buffy looked towards Spike, pleading with him to stay silent.

"Angel, you can't just come to town like this and expect things to be the same," Buffy said.

"They're not the same!" he cried.  "For one thing, the last time I checked, you were dead!"

"Things change," Buffy said softly.

"Obviously," Angel said bitterly.  "Buffy, I came back because you were in trouble.  Cordy had a vision and you were in it, much to everyone's disbelief.  Those visions don't come unless it's something worth my efforts," Angel said.

"Well, I'm so glad I'm worth your effort.  But, newsflash.  I'm in trouble everyday Angel.  And I've got the help I need here.  You don't need to come into my life every second that I'm in danger," she said.

Angel glared towards Spike, noticing his small smirk.  It looked similar to the one that Angel himself had given to Riley the last time Angel had been in Sunnydale.

"And where does _he_ fit into all of this?" Angel asked, motioning towards his childe.

"_He_ is part of the Scooby Gang.  Like I said, I've got all the help I need," she said.

Angel stepped towards Spike who stood up straighter, trying to be at eye level with his sire.

"You're in love with her," Angel said accusingly.

Buffy looked towards Spike, wondering what exactly his response to that would be.

"What of it?" he asked, a smile coming to his face.  "You still are."

"You don't even have a soul," Angel said, his voice full of bitterness.

"Just 'cause you were incapable of loving when you're a soulless prick doesn't mean that I can't.  You and me have always been different Angelus.  You know it, I know it, the Slayer bloody knows it as well.  I may not have a soul, but I was never capable of pulling the crap you did," Spike said.

Buffy looked towards Angel, knowing that Spike's words were true.  Angelus had never been capable of love, only of obsession.  And Buffy knew that Spike's devotion was much more than obsession.  She had watched from above and saw him grieving more than any normal man may have.

"Buffy," Angel said, looking at his former lover with pleading eyes.  He wanted her to tell him that Spike's affections were completely one-sided.  Having Buffy fall for his childe would have been too much to bear.

"Angel, you don't know what things have been like around here.  And I know without a doubt that Spike does love me.  And Dawn.  And the gang as well," Buffy said.

"I wouldn't go that far, pet," Spike interjected.

"I would.  I've seen you with them.  You and Giles are exactly alike, you take care of Dawn without even thinking of yourself, and I know that you like Willow and Xander, even though the get on your nerves," Buffy said.

"So I like 'em, big deal.  Doesn't mean I bloody love 'em," Spike said defensively.

Buffy shrugged, letting him believe whatever he wanted to believe.

"So you're saying that you and Spike are…what?  Together?  A couple?  Are you in love with him?" Angel asked, the hurt evident in his voice.

Buffy hesitated.  Whatever she said here was going to hurt someone.  The question came down to who she wanted to hurt the least.

"I'm not saying that I'm in love with Spike," Buffy said, cringing as Spike's face fell with disappointment.  "I'm just saying that I'm not completely disgusted by it," she continued.

Spike looked up at her, hope in his eyes.  She hadn't seen him look that thrilled since he had found her in the cemetery the other night, clawing at her gravestone and shouting at Spike's soul for abandoning her.

"Buffy, I left you so you could have a normal life!  A normal partner!"

Buffy shook her head, knowing that Angel clearly didn't understand who she was.

"Me, have a normal life?  Angel, you left me because you and I couldn't be together like that.  You didn't leave me so I could be normal.  'Cause I'll never be normal.  I'll always be the Slayer.  And my shelf life is never going to be as long as anyone else's.  I've already died twice Angel, I don't want to die again without knowing that I can have passion and love and romance for the last few years of my life," Buffy explained.

"But why with him?  Of all people?!  He's not even a person," Angel said.

"Neither are you.  Angel, I'm sorry, but…we were over a long time ago," Buffy said gently.

Angel went to say something more but stopped and nodded his agreement.

"You're right.  We have moved on.  And…I may be falling for someone back in LA, so I can't really come and tell you how to live your life.  But I'm not leaving without helping you through whatever Cordy saw in her vision," Angel said.

Buffy shook her head, telling him he wasn't wanted or needed here anymore.

"Angel, I've already told you…I don't need your help anymore.  I've been coping fine without you for the last three years.  There's people in LA who need your help more than I do," Buffy said.

"Buffy, I'm not leaving until I know you're safe," Angel said, his voice showing his stubbornness.

"She's safe," Spike said, stepping forward as if to challenge his sire to disagree.

"With you?" Angel spat.

"Yes, with him," Buffy said, stepping forward to be beside Spike.  "He's got my back for about a year now Angel.  I trust him with my life," she said.

"See how far that got you last time with Glory," Angel said accusingly.

Spike felt as though he had been staked in the chest.  Buffy grabbed his arm to keep him from pouncing on top of Angel and pummelling him to a pulp.

"What happened with Glory was meant to be.  It happened because it was meant to happen.  Dying was the work that I had to do," Buffy said calmly.

Angel shook his head, still glaring at Spike.

"It shouldn't have come to that.  He should have been there!" Angel cried.

Spike suddenly understood what his sire was saying.  Angel wasn't accusing Spike, he was accusing himself.

"So should you!" Spike yelled.

Angel stopped and stared at his childe.  Spike raised his eyebrows, challenging his sire to disagree with him.  

"You try and blame everyone else for it, but really you're blaming yourself.  You think that you could have stopped it if you had been here.  If she had trusted you with protecting Dawn.  But you ran away.  You ran far, far away from here, away from her.  And it kills you because she's moving on to things that aren't you.  You always were possessive," Spike said bitterly.

Buffy looked between the two vampires, each of them glaring at the other.

"Angel, even if you were here, nothing would have changed.  I was supposed to jump.  The Powers That Be told me that jumping was what I had to do.  That death was my gift to give.  That's why I'm back here.  I gave my gift, and now I'm receiving one back," Buffy explained.

"Buffy…"

Angel couldn't really tell her anything that would convince her that Spike couldn't possibly be able to help her as Angel could.  But Angel knew firsthand that Spike was tough and, if nothing else, he was loyal to a fault.  He had loved Drusilla for over a hundred years, even though Drusilla had never loved him back.

"Angel I'm sorry, but…you're not needed here."

Angel nodded and stepped back, silently telling Buffy that he accepted that he wasn't wanted in Sunnydale any longer.  Before he walked away from Sunnydale for the last time, he turned to Spike and glared one last time.

"If you hurt her, I'll kill you."

~*~

Buffy shifted uncomfortably as she watched Angel walking away from her.  Somehow, it hurt less and less each time he did it.  

She stole a sidewards glance at Spike who looked unusually solemn.  She heard him clear his throat and she looked up at him directly.

"You alright, pet?" he asked.

She nodded, unable to form words to try and explain what had just happened.

"So, uh…" Spike stopped, suddenly speechless.

Buffy looked down at the ground, her right foot softly kicking her left foot in nervous anticipation.  Why was Spike of all people, of all demons making her this nervous?

He stepped forward and gently touched her neck.  She flinched at the coldness of his touched, but at his wounded face, she ignored the pain that coursed through her still open wound and leant into his touch.

He leant forward slightly, moving slowly, unsure of why he would have sworn that he could feel his heart beating.

He remembered a time when Angelus had told him one of the reasons that he had hated Buffy.  She had made him feel alive, made him feel human again.  Angelus' very reason of hatred was why Spike had fallen for her.

Unconsciously, he licked his lips, and saw her do the same.

"Buffy-"

He was stopped suddenly by her mouth meeting his, her lips crushing against his.  

It was everything he had dreamed it to be, only made better by the reality of it.  She had kissed him once before as a thank-you, he had been kissed by the Buffy-bot, but never with the bottled up passion that he felt from her lips as she kissed him.

Their tongues danced, and both fought for dominance, their hands meeting and clinging to one another as though there would be no tomorrow.  Though after dying and being brought back, one tended to live for the now.

They both drew back, Buffy breathless, Spike surprised by her actions.

He looked at her curiously, wondering when she would hit him, push his chest and tell him to put a stake in himself.  All she could do was look at him in wonder.

"Spike-"

"Buffy-"

They both laughed a little, thankful for the small break in tension as they spoke at the same time.

"You go first," Spike offered.

Buffy smiled gratefully.

"I uh…just wanted to say thank you.  For before.  If you hadn't have shown…I woulda been dead.  Or worse.  And…also I wanted to say sorry for Angel.  Him beating you up can't have been too much fun for you."

"I've had far worse," Spike said.

Buffy nodded, remembering when Glory had tortured him for hours on end to find out where the Key was hidden.

Buffy cleared her throat and tried to meet his gaze, but found herself too afraid to look into his eyes for fear of what she would find there.

Love she could deal with.  Disgust, indifference or hate…it would have killed her inside, hurt her far worse than any vampire could have hurt her.

"You were going to say?" she asked.

He hesitated and decided to just dive straight in.  After all, he was still the Big Bad, and he was going to tell her exactly what he thought of her, regardless of how she felt for him.

"I love you."

He didn't even give her a chance to reply, a chance to react to his words.  His mouth was upon hers in seconds, his hands running through her hair.  His only thought as she put her hands on his waist to draw him closer was that she can't have minded too much.

Suddenly she pushed him away as quickly as he had pulled her to him. 

Spike held in an unnecessary breath and waited for her to tell him to go jump, to tell him to go find something dead to date.

"I meant what I said before, to Angel.  When I accused him of beating up my boyfriends.  It's…it's how I want to think of you.  It's how I've thought of you for a while now."

He smiled, something he rarely did, ever since getting the chip put into his cranium.

She smiled back shyly and reached her hand up to his head, running her fingers through the short hairs on the back of his neck.  She pulled him towards her, hugging him tightly, thankful that she had finally admitted to herself and to him what she wanted.

"We should probably get back to the shop," Spike whispered after a few more moments of their shared silence.

Buffy reluctantly let go and nodded her agreement.  Before she let him begin walking, she kissed him once more quickly and grinned sheepishly.

"You call that a kiss?" Spike asked.

She laughed a little and bit her lower lip.  "Not really, no."

"Good," he replied, half laughing as he did.

He leant forward and caught her lips with his own, thankful that he had finally been given a chance to walk in the sunshine that was Buffy.

Buffy pulled back suddenly as she heard a shocked gasp come from behind them.  She turned to see who was watching them and saw Xander, Willow and Giles standing there, Xander with his mouth open, Willow looking a little shocked, but still pleased, Anya grinning from ear to ear and Giles trying to hide a smile.

Giles stepped forward and his smile immediately resided.

"Giles-" Buffy started, seeing the expression on his face become one of violent contempt.

He was in front of her, his fingers coming up to her neck gently.  Anger flashed through his eyes.

"Who did this to you?" 

"They're dust," Spike answered.

Giles turned to look at him, Spike giving him a silent look, telling him that the Slayer was safe.

"And Angel?" Giles asked.

"You knew he was here?" Buffy asked, hurt that no one had told her.

"He came into the Magic Box about fifteen minutes ago.  He said Cordelia had a vision with you in it, so he came to help you," Giles explained.

"Angel left.  He's needed back in LA," Buffy said simply.

Giles looked at her disapprovingly.  "Buffy, if the Powers that Be sent Cordelia a message with you in it, it obviously means that you're in some kind of danger."

Buffy stared at him and finally nodded.  "You're right.  And right now, I've got no chance of stopping this demon transformation thingy from happening, so…I'll need all the help I can get.  But not from him."

She turned to Spike.  "Whatever you need," he said, his three words sealing his promise to protect her sister.

Buffy turned to the rest of the group and couldn't help but almost smile at Xander's still shocked face.  "Come on, we need to get back.  If we're gonna beat this guy, we're gonna need everything we've got."

~*~

Dawn sat comfortably in a bean bag chair by one of the shelves, reading the Harry Potter book that her sister had questioned her about before.  She was so engrossed in the events of a Quidditch match that she didn't even look up when the bell above the door rang.

Amy and Tara, on the other hand, looked up immediately.

"Shops closed," Tara said to a young teenage boy.

"S'okay," he replied.  "I'm not really here to buy anything."

Amy looked towards Tara, whose eyes suddenly opened in fear.  She cast a look towards Dawn who suddenly looked up.

Dawn was on her feet quickly as she recognised the boy who had tried to gain access to her home the other night. 

"You," she said, trying to step away, but finding herself cornered.

Tara went to run forward to stand between Dawn and the boy who she now believed to be the boy-vamp Christian.  She felt strong hands on her arms and swung around to see two vamps staring at her hungrily.

Christian stepped forward towards Dawn who suddenly stood straight, glaring defiantly at him.  Christian grinned and laughed a little.

"It's really too bad that Court wants you alive.  I could have had a helluva time teaching you our ways," he said, eyeing her up and down.

She went to run, but his fist went around her wrist within milliseconds.  She struggled but he threw her into the shelf, making both Dawn and the shelf fall loudly to the ground.  Tara protested loudly and struggled against her captor.

Christian turned to look towards Tara and Amy.

"Leave them.  I want them completely fine when the Slayer finds them."

The vamps holding Tara and Amy growled, unhappy that the prospects of an easy feed had been denied to them.  The vamps threw them into the table, the glass smashing as Tara's weight came down in the centre.

The two young girls watched helplessly as the vamps grabbed Dawn and roughly pulled her away from the store.

A single tear rolled down Tara's face, knowing that this time, she had failed to protect Dawn.


	9. Chapter Eight: Yhidnamanna

CHAPTER EIGHT: YHIDNAMANNA 

The bell rattled as Giles opened the door, allowing Buffy to enter the shop first.  She stopped suddenly, causing her Watcher to smash into her and stumble a little.

The Slayer burst into a run to the stairs where Amy was kneeling in front of Tara, applying pressure to a wound on Tara's forearm.

"What happened?" Buffy asked urgently.

"Vampires.  They came in and…there were just too many of them," Amy explained.

Buffy felt her heart stop beating.  Spike heard it falter and begin to race.  He put his hand on the small of her back.

"Where is she?" 

Tara closed her eyes and looed down.  "They took her."

Buffy looked towards Spike, praying that he would have answers for her.

"Did you know this would happen tonight?" she asked.

"No.  I wasn't told anything, luv, I swear," he said.

Buffy nodded, knowing that he would never betray herself or Dawn like that.  "Do you know where they would have taken her?" she asked.

Spike nodded.  "They're holed up next to the old high school.  It's an abandoned warehouse."

"That makes sense.  They want to be close to the hellmouth when it opens," Giles explained.  

"Weapons all around then.  If they're taking Dawn, then they're gonna be doing the ritual soon," Buffy said.  "Probably tonight."

Spike nodded his agreement and headed out to the training room, helping himself to a pile of weapons.  The others followed his lead and quickly, without thinking much further than protecting Dawn, they headed towards the warehouse, desperately hoping that they would all come out alive.

Buffy let Giles lead the group, she and Spike hanging towards the back.  She stopped suddenly and looked at him.

"Spike-"

"She's safe," Spike said.  "I won't let anything happen to her.  Not again."

Buffy nodded and they continued walking.  She looked at him sideways and tried to stop her stomach from doing flip-flops. She had promised herself that when she had the chance, she would tell him that he wasn't a monster, that he wasn't beneath her.  That never was a long time.  That she loved him.

"Spike-"

"They're all safe, luv.  I won't let anyone hurt them," he said, stopping and turning towards her.

"I wasn't gonna say that, but…it's nice to hear it anyway," Buffy said.

Spike licked his lips nervously, wishing that the tight constriction in his chest wasn't hurting so much.  "What did you want to say then?"

"I just…I've been wanting to tell you something since I got back.  Something about what you said to me the night that…well…when we were at my house getting weapons.  You said that you knew I'd never love you and that you're a monster.  Well…I just…I needed to tell you that…you were wrong," Buffy said.

Spike looked at her, his eyes full of hope.  Was she really telling him the words that he had desperately longed to hear for so long?

"I just thought that you should know that," Buffy said.

She went to keep walking but felt a gentle hand on her wrist.  She turned to him and saw his head duck forward, a soft kiss brushing over her lips.

"So you do?  Love me?"

She nodded and saw him smile.

"Say it for me?  Just so I know I'm not imagining things," he pleaded.

Buffy smiled and kissed him softly.  "I love you."

Spike breathed in deeply, revelling in her words.  He smiled and brushed her lips with his.

"We've got a little sis to save," he whispered, taking her hand.

~*~

Buffy looked through a tiny crack in the disintegrating wood that the warehouse was built of.  The rest of the gang was gathered behind her, all of them fearful about ambushing the place without a plan.  But, what other choice did they have?

"What do you see?" Giles whispered.

Buffy squinted through the knothole in the wood.

"I can see six vamps standing in a semi circle.  There's…I can't see properly, but it looks like there's six sets of chains coming from the roof.  I can't see what they're holding, but I would bet my life that it's the sacrifices," Buffy said.

"Can you see Court?" Spike asked.

Buffy shook her head.  "Can't even see Christian.  Oh, wait…there's another three vamps walking into the room.  One of them…he's kneeling down on the ground.  He looks like he's drawing something."

"They're starting the ritual," Giles said.  

Buffy moved over so that Giles could look through the tiny hole.

"It'd be best to make our move now, the ritual's only just begun.  If we can get in there before Court becomes invincible, we'd stand a much better chance," Giles said.

Buffy nodded and took in her surroundings.

"There's a back door.  It looks like you'd come into the room just to the left of where the six people are being chained up," Buffy said.  "Spike, take Tara, Amy, Anya and Xander round the back.  At the moment, our biggest priority is stopping the ritual.  If we take away the sacrifices, they can't finish it."

Spike nodded and looked to the group that had been assigned to him.

"What's the signal?" Spike asked.

"You wait until we're inside.  Wait until we've taken down three vamps.  Spike, you're with them cos I know you'll protect her," Buffy said.

Spike nodded, thanking her for giving him a second chance to prove that he could protect Dawn.  Without another word, Spike led his group around the back.

"Will, Giles, you're with me."

"What about me?" came a voice from behind.

Buffy spun around to see her ex-lover standing behind, holding a crossbow and a stake.

"Angel-"

"Buffy, you're sister was taken.  You're not gonna be able to take out all the vamps in that room with only three of you fighting," Angel said.

Buffy closed her eyes for a moment, trying to remember how to breath.

"Okay, fine.  Here's the plan.  Angel, you and Will go in through the front.  They'll be expecting more, which is fine, but they won't be expecting three different points of entry.  Giles and I will come in from the stairs," Buffy said, taking in the fire escape that looked as though it had never been used.

Angel and Giles nodded while Willow could only try not to look too terrified.

"Will, if you don't wanna do this, I totally understand," Buffy whispered.

"No, I'll be fine.  But…why am I with you guys.  You're the fighters, not me."

"Are you kidding me?" Buffy asked.  "After what I saw you do to Glory?  You've got some serious power Will.  And if all else fails, I know you can conjure up some fog for us."

"Oooo, I could try that sunlight spell," Willow suggested.

Buffy looked towards Angel, but her thoughts were with Spike.  "Probably not too good an idea.  Considering we've got two vamps fighting with us."

"Oh.  Fog it is then."

Giles saw Buffy nod, a grave look on her face.

"Willow, you researched closing the hellmouth, didn't you?" Giles asked.

Willow gave a small grin.  "Don't worry Giles.  Between Amy, Tara and myself, that hellmouth is as good as closed." 

Buffy nodded and hugged her best friend quickly.  

She turned back to Giles and Angel.  "Let's go."

~*~

Giles clambered up the fire escape, turning to give his hand to the Slayer who accepted his help and swung deftly onto a metal platform.

"Are you certain this is going to work?" Giles asked.

Buffy shrugged.  "It has to."

Giles nodded, fearing that he was going to lose her again.  "But whatever happens…it'll work out in the end."

Giles nodded and brought his stake out from his pocket.

"This is it."

Buffy nodded and kicked in a window, jumping onto the ground and rolling swiftly.  A single vamp had been guarding the room, his body turning to dust before he could even sound the alarm.

Giles jumped down from the platform into the room and stood behind his Slayer.

They cautiously made their way down the corridor, stakes and crosses at the ready.

Buffy stopped at the top of the stairs and looked down.

She held back a gasp as she saw her younger sister chained to the wall, her hands bound, tears on her cheeks.

Giles put his hand on her shoulder softly.

"We'll get her out of this."

Buffy nodded and without another word, they made their way down the stairs.  Deliberately, Buffy jumped four stairs, landing at the bottom with a thump.

She grinned as all six vampires turned and made their way towards her.  She had taken the entire group away from the sacrifices.  

Giles saw the smile and understood that this was the way that Buffy had planned it, without ever really knowing for sure if it would work out that way.

Buffy stood in her defensive position, the first position she had ever been taught as a Slayer.  Her fists at the ready, her legs ready for flight or fight, her stake poised to kill.

Giles could only think that they were lucky not to have been ambushed.  These vampires may be working for the one person, but they were not working as a team.

Buffy easily dusted one without even trying.  Several of the remaining five took unconscious steps backwards.  Buffy could only grin as she launched herself into the group, Giles watching her back and taking out another vampire as he did.

He saw two doors open simultaneously, Angel in front of Willow, Spike in front of Tara, Anya and Amy.

The four vamps turned to look at the distraction, two vamps continuing the fight with the Slayer and Watcher, one going to stop Angel and Willow from entering further, and the other going to stop the sacrifices from being rescued.

Spike easily dusted the vampire that went to stop the rescue plan.  Xander went to help the six people chained to the wall, his eyes falling first to where Dawn was chained.

"STOP!"

The room froze, unsure of where the command had come from.  Buffy, however took the opportunity and dusted the two vampires that had been fighting herself and Giles.

Buffy looked up and saw a tall vampire in the centre of the room.  He wasn't wearing his game face, and she could suddenly see why Xander would be threatened by Court taking Anya away from him.

Court walked towards Buffy who stood, glaring defiantly at the vampire who had taken over the city of vampires so easily.

"You are perhaps the Slayer that Christian was telling me about," he said, his voice was soft and clear, much like Angel's.

"You learn quickly," Buffy replied.

"Perhaps I should introduce myself.  My name's Court, and…soon I shall be invincible.  You may not want to piss me off honey."

Two doors flung open, and Buffy's vampire senses went into overload.  She looked around the room and saw at least a dozen vampires enter through each of the doors.

Court turned to look at the group of vamps to his right.  "Is the ritual complete?" 

One of the vampires nodded and Court smiled sadistically.  Buffy looked towards Giles, panicked.  She hadn't counted on the ritual being completed already.

Court saw Buffy's frightened expression and took another step closer to her.  "You don't honestly think that we would wait for so long to do the ritual, do you?"

Buffy went to answer, but instead, she was thrown to the ground, Court moving towards her so swiftly that neither Buffy nor Giles had a chance to move.  Giles raced to her side, helping her to stand up again, but his effort was futile.

The ground began shaking underneath them and Court laughed maniacally.

"It's begun.  You can't stop it Slayer.  None of your little friends can stop it, and…as soon as I become invincible, all of you will pay dearly," he said.

Court turned away from Buffy and walked across the trembling ground to where Spike was holding Tara and Amy up, Xander and Anya clutching to each other for support.

"Spike, I knew from the first that you wouldn't have it in you.  But, honestly, I thought that you might be stupid enough to think that we believed you were on our side.  We just wanted you here so you could see your beloved Key taken away from you," Court said.  "Plus, the added bonus of staking you."

Spike glared at him, and in a bold move, he pounced towards the larger vampire, fangs beared.  

Six vamps ran forward to protect their leader, struggling to get Spike off Court, and then throwing him into the ground.

Before the vamps could begin a harsher attack on the blonde vampire, the trembling of the earth stopped.  Court looked up towards the pentagram that had been drawn on the floor.

"Here he comes," Court whispered, almost reverently.

Buffy stood quickly and tried to race over to Court, a stake raised, but the group of vamps that had been about to pound on Spike turned towards her.  

"No!" Court yelled, seeing the intent to kill the Slayer written clearly on their faces.  "Not yet."

Court quickly shut his mouth as the floor encompassed within the pentagram gave way, creating a gaping hole.  Buffy took a step back and could only watch helplessly as Yhidnamanna rose from the ground.

~*~

Spike looked up from his position on the floor and saw Buffy's look of dismay.  The demon that was rising from the ground was big.  Mayor big.  Tentacles were waving wildly around the room, threatening to hit anyone who dared to come near the creature.

The room became deathly quiet as the rumbling of the ground stopped.

Vampires and humans alike stared at the creature in fear and fascination.  Court was the only one in the room to move closer to the demon.

"Yhidnamanna, I summoned thee, my sacrifices are pure, my intents are not.  It is my will that you should open the hellmouth, that all creatures will bow before me, that I will be invincible as the demon in human form," Court said.

The demon turned one of its two heads to look at Court, his game face finally showing.

"You wish to be a Korickana," the demon said.  His voice was low, raspy, threatening.  It seemed to echo throughout the room.

Court nodded and waited for an answer.

"And the sacrifices?" Yhidnamanna asked.

Court pointed to where Dawn and five others were being held, a group of vampires standing between the sacrifices and the Scooby Gang.

The demon looked them over, keeping two eyes on Court and looking at the frightened people chained to the wall.

"You have brought me the Key."

"Yes."

"Your sacrifices are pure, your intent is not.  By the power of all that is below, I give you what you desire."

Court grinned and Buffy could only watch as his fangs and the ridges on his face faded away.  

Buffy heard Giles swear, his whispered tones breaking her thoughts away from what Court had become.

Buffy cast a glance towards where her sister was chained to the wall.  Dawn was looking at her desperately, hoping that Buffy could somehow rescue her.  Buffy closed her eyes, trying to think clearly.

Giles put a hand on her shoulder, startling her out of her thoughts.  He pointed towards something and saw a group of vampires gathering around Yhidnamanna.  Each vampire seemed to be carrying an axe and what looked like the Initiative's taser blasters.

"I think Anya was right.  She said that Court was probably going to try and break free from the control that Yhidnamanna has on him," Giles whispered.

Buffy looked at Giles, wondering if he had silently been suggesting what she had thought.

"So, we have to stop Court from killing Yhidnamanna, is that what you're saying?"

Giles nodded, wishing that there were some other way to do this.  Going up against a group of vampires holding axes and blaster was not going to be easy at all.

Court looked up, his eyes glowing a bright red colour.  "It is finished," he proclaimed loudly, his voice seemed to have become lower, more menacing than before.

Yhidnamanna nodded with both heads and turned to look at the sacrifices.

"Now, the rest can begin."

Yhidnammana looked back at Court only a moment before all hell broke loose.

~*~

Vampires were rushing towards the towering demon from all angles.  Shots fired out and suddenly, a fog filled the room.  Buffy looked towards where Willow stood, but she was looking as shocked as everyone else.

Court rushed towards the Slayer, his eyes flashing with violence.  It took everything she had not to tumble to the ground as Court delivered a sharp kick to the side of her head.

She was having trouble seeing through the fog, and Court kept getting the better of her.

Her eyes were stinging and watering badly.  She hesitated, but closed her eyes and honed in her hearing.  Everything seemed to slow down, and without warning, everything that was the Slayer kicked into action.

Her punches were direct, hitting Court with an accuracy that Buffy hadn't had before.  Her attacks, however, were in vain.  She knew she couldn't kill this demon, but there had to be a way to weaken him. 

"Buffy!" 

She opened her eyes a little, trying to see what was happening, trying to work out who had called her name, but the fog was still thick around her.

Without warning, she felt her body fling backwards into the staircase, the stairs cracking under the force that had thrown her backwards.  She tried to stand but felt the sole of huge black boots crushing her left hand.  She winced in pain and looked up.

"That the best you got Slayer?" Court asked.

She winced as he twisted his foot and heard the bones in her hand break.  She tried to strike out at him with her free hand, but before she could even move, he had kicked her upside the head with his other foot.

She looked desperately around the room, but she could only see the white fog.

"Spike!" she cried out loudly, hoping that his vampiric hearing would hear her cries above the noise of the fight.

"He won't save you honey," Court whispered to hear, his mouth so close to her ear that she could feel the breath he used only to speak.

She felt a stab of pain in her neck and realised that Court was sinking his fangs into her neck, beginning the painful process of draining her body.  She tried to cry out, but no sound emerged, the pain from her neck and her hand about to send her body into a state of shock.

She suddenly felt nothing, the boot lifted from her hand, the demon removed from the stairs.  She looked up vaguely, her head throbbing and saw someone standing in front of her protectively.

"Xander!" she cried, thankful that he had removed Court from her hand and neck, but wishing that he had kept away from the fray.  

She moved to stand up before Court could regain his balance, but the vampire-turned-demon was standing in front of Xander, a challenge written across his face.

"You dare to challenge me over what is rightfully mine?" Court hissed.

Xander glared at him hatefully, knowing there was no way he was going to let Buffy be defeated by this demon.  He would protect her or die trying.

Buffy saw Court's eyes flash a purple colour.  She weakly pushed Xander aside and stood in front of Court, never for a moment thinking that if she died, then no one in this room would stand a chance.

"You're fight is with me," she said, ignoring the pain that shot through her hand with every movement, ignoring that the room seemed to be spinning.

Court grinned and gave a single nod before grabbing her around her waist, lifting her from her feet and throwing her into the banister, breaking the shabby wooden frame and falling onto the stairs.

Court jumped up to where Buffy had landed and promptly gave a swift kick to her stomach, punching her face quickly as her hands went to protect the lower half of her body.

Buffy could taste the blood in her mouth, could feel her split lip and realised that her right eye was becoming swollen from Court's attacks. She raised her injured hand instinctively to protect herself, but Court grabbed hold of it, squeezing the bones tightly and twisted the arm behind her back, effectively trapping her other hand under her fallen body.

Without even thinking, she moved a leg and managed to clip Court's leg, making him lose balance and let go of her hand.  She quickly took it back, clutching it to her chest in pain.

"Broke your hand did I?" he asked, grinning maniacally as he quickly regained his footing and kicked her chest, taking hold of her arm again.

She glared defiantly at him, grasping at an unknown source of power, and pulled away from his grip.  "Got another," she stated, pushing him violently down the stairs as she punched him with her good arm.

She jumped over the top of the fallen demon, pulling Xander with her as they raced through the battle zone towards where the sacrifices were being chained.

It seemed as though neither Yhidnamanna or Court was terribly worried over the sacrifices, and Amy and Tara were trying to magick the shackles off the six frightened teenagers.

Buffy looked up as she heard the demon Yhidnamanna give a loud shriek, sounding much like Richard Wilkins had when he had been torched with flame throwers at graduation.

Spike was beside Buffy in an instant, her Slayer senses noticing him before he touched her shoulder to get her attention.

"We have to stop them from killing that demon.  If we don't…well…the hellmouth will open, and Court's gonna be extremely happy," Spike said.

"You mean the hellmouth isn't open?" Buffy asked.

Anya came to join the Slayer and the vampire.  "He never was one to be patient. Yhidnamanna didn't have a chance to complete the ritual, and Court didn't realise it until it was too late."

"There are other ways of opening it though," Buffy said through clenched teeth.  Her hand was throbbing and she wasn't sure how much longer she could stay in the fight with only one good arm and a considerable amount of blood loss.

Another shriek came from the demon, tentacles flailing through the air.  It was defending itself by trying to trip the vampires who were shooting at it with bullets, and tearing at it with swords and crossbows.

"Let's just stick to saving this bloody demon for now, pet," Spike said.

Buffy nodded and pushed herself to ignore her hand and neck.  She produced her faithful stake that Kendra had given to her before she had been killed by Drusilla.

"Let's do this," she said softly.

Spike nodded once and began running towards the battle.

Angel and Giles had been attacking vampires, trying to take their attentions away from the giant demon in front of them.  The vampires only began defending themselves when they realised that the group was defending the demon in the middle.

Buffy easily dusted a vampire and found herself nose to tentacle of the giant demon.  A vampire hit her in the back, and she stumbled forward, gaining the attention of one of Yhidnamanna's heads.

Buffy fought with the vampire, knocking the crossbow out of its hand. Behind her, Yhidnamanna raised a tentacle, intending to squash the Slayer, but as the Slayer dusted the offending vampire with her injured hand, she grabbed the fallen crossbow and stood defensively in front of the demon.  Yhidnamanna hesitated and directed it's flying tentacle at another vampire.

The fog suddenly lifted altogether and everything became clear.  

Spike and Angel were fighting back to back against three vampires, Spike taking on two and Angel taking the other.  Tara, Amy and Willow had succeeded in a spell to take off the chains that were binding the intended sacrifices, and Xander was protecting the group from being attacked by vampires.

Court was standing arrogantly at the stairs, watching the battle.  Christian stood beside him, leaning against the banister, a bored look on his vamped face.

Buffy raised her cross bow, as though she were about to shoot the vampire in front of her, but quickly staked the vampire through the heart as she pulled the trigger of the crossbow, pain coursing through her broken hand as she staked the vampire.

Christian looked up in surprise as he felt the bolt hit his chest directly in the heart.

Court looked down at his right hand man, frowned for a moment, and then shrugged as the young vampire turned to dust.

Buffy turned her attentions back to defending the demon, and saw that the vampires were beginning to diminish in numbers.  It occurred to her suddenly that her Watcher was nowhere to be seen. 

Panicked, she looked around her, thinking he may have gone to help Xander and the others get the sacrifices out, but he was not with them.  Xander saw her panicked look and gave her a questioning look which she ignored, still looking around the room.

"Where's Giles?" she called above the noise.

Spike turned to look at her, dusting a vampire that had leapt to attack him.

"He was with you on the stairs last time I saw him," he replied.

She looked around again, trying desperately to see where her Watcher had gone.  

She saw a movement on the stairs and watched as Court jumped from the fifth step onto the bottom landing.

"Missing someone?" he asked.

Buffy glared at him and poised the crossbow at his chest, hoping that the bolt would at least weaken the demon.

In her distraction, she had stopped fighting and all of a sudden she felt something pierce her stomach.  She looked down and saw a bolt from a crossbow, Court holding up the bow which had caused her injury.  She hadn't even seen him holding the weapon.  

She struggled not to fall to her knees, clenching her teeth to ignore the pain.  She stared at him, and aimed the cross bow again.

"Too bad you weren't watching your Watcher," he commented snidely.  "You would have seen where Christian took him.  Now…young Christian is gone, and…it looks like I'm you're only hope in finding him.  Or finding him alive at any rate."

Buffy shot off the crossbow, hitting Court directly in the heart.  Court gave a small grin and yanked it from his chest, snapping the arrow in half over his knee.

"Nice shot, Slayer.  Too bad I'm invincible, cos…otherwise, that might have actually hurt, but…I guess from that lovely arrow of mine sticking out of your stomach, you'd know that.  But, I think I'd like to finish what we started so long ago…that would be me killing you by the way."

He stepped forward, keeping an eye on the Slayer and on the demon that she was protecting.  Yhidnamanna wasn't invincible like Court, and Buffy could tell that the large demon was struggling to stay alive.

Buffy saw out of the corner of her eye that Spike and Angel were facing the last three vampires that Court had requisitioned to help him open the hellmouth.  She saw Spike dust one, and after that, the other two were easy for Spike and Angel to finish off.

The odds were considerably better now that it was the entire Scooby Gang, plus one giant pissed off demon, against an invincible Korickana.

"You forgot one thing," Buffy said.

"Oh…and what's that?" Court asked, smirking, knowing that there was no way the Slayer would walk out of the building alive.

"I can kill you," came a raspy voice from behind Buffy.

The Slayer breathed in relief as Court looked up at the giant demon.

Buffy felt her knees weaken and the room began to spin once more.  Everything went black, and suddenly she collapsed in a heap on the floor.

"Buffy!" 

The blonde vampire was at her side in an instant.  Court momentarily forgot about the demon he had offended and grinned at the sight of the crumpled Slayer.

"You have betrayed me," Yhidnamanna continued, bringing Court's attention back to the issue at hand.

"No, sire…I wasn't to know," Court began.

"You thought you're minions could dispose of me, and you could reign over the hellmouth.  For your treason, not only will you be executed, but the hellmouth will not be opened for you or anyone else," Yhidnamanna said.

Court took a step back, fearing what his creator could do to him.

"For your betrayal," Yhidnamanna started, holding up an injured tentacle in the air. 

Spike watched as a single drop of the demons blood fell onto the newly made Korick.  Court fell to the ground in pain, covering the skin that the blood dropped.

"The spilt blood of your creator burns deeply in you.  So deeply, that you're body will burn and your flesh will melt.  From dust you were made man.  From man, you were made vampire.  From hell, you were made demon.  And from demon, you were destroyed and returned to the dust," the large demon chanted.  "As from below, you were created, so from below, you will be shattered."

Spike watched as Court writhed in agony for a moment longer before he seemed to burn from the inside, finally becoming dust on the ground.

Spike breathed a sigh of relief and focused on the fallen Slayer.  Angel raced over to him, kneeling by his ex-lovers side.

"She's unconscious," Spike said softly.

Angel nodded and stood up, going to leave Spike and Buffy alone again.

"No!" Spike said.  "Take her with you, she needs a hospital.  I have to find her Watcher."

Angel paused but nodded, bending down to pick the Slayer up in his arms.

"Just hurry," Angel cautioned.  "This building looks like it's about to collapse."

Spike nodded and watched as Angel walked away, holding Spike's love in his arms.  Spike swallowed hard and turned back, only to be faced with the realisation that the large demon hadn't returned to its realm.

"You knew that Court would betray me?" the demon asked.

Spike nodded.  "Not much we could bloody do about it.  Not without getting our throats ripped out."

"Then I must repay you for what you have done today," the demon said.

Spike shook his head, wanting to find Buffy's Watcher and get out of the collapsing building.

"No thanks needed.  Just tell me where I can find the Watcher.  British bloke, bout ye high," Spike said, indicating a little higher than himself.

"I saw a young vampire take him up the stairs.  He'll probably be in one of the rooms," the demon said.

"Right.  Ta mate," Spike said, going to move around the demon.  A tentacle came down in front of Spike, blocking the stairs.

Spike looked at the demon, silently telling it that he was not in the mood for games.  The tentacle lifted up and Spike went to walk under it.  The tip of the demon's limb touched Spike's head softly, and Spike felt a sting of electricity flow through his body, sending him sprawling to the ground.

"What the hell was that for?" he cried, indignantly, trying to stand up.

Yhidnamanna gave a wry smile with both faces.  "That was a thank you."

Spike suddenly realised what had happened to him.  The chip.  He had removed the chip.


	10. Chapter Nine: Chipless

CHAPTER NINE: CHIPLESS

Spike stared at the giant demon, suddenly speechless.  His eyes were wide in fear.  He hadn't counted on the chip being removed, and now that it was gone, his only thought was that he wanted it back.

"Put it back!" he yelled.

Yhidnamanna looked at him, confusion written in both sets of eyes.

"I was under the impression that you wanted the chip gone," Yhidnamanna said.

"No!!  That chip is the only thing that's…it's the only way she'll…"

Yhidnamanna nodded with both heads and bent down to look eye to eye with the vampire.

"You don't give the Slayer enough credit young vampire," the demon said.  "Or yourself for that matter.  It wasn't the chip that kept you from killing people."

Spike glared at the demon hatefully and finally looked away.  He turned and walked to the stairs, wishing he could think clearly, but now that his head was throbbing from the pain, he couldn't form anything that even resembled a good thought.

Yhidnamanna watched as Spike went up the stairs to retrieve Buffy's Watcher and the demon could only smile a bittersweet smile as he once again descended to where he had come from.  

Spike looked over his shoulder to see Yhidnamanna sinking back into the ground.  Spike tried to ignore the fact that the large demon winked once at him before leaving the old warehouse, and he continued up the stairs, following the sounds of a moaning Watcher.

"Let's get you outta here mate," Spike said quietly, helping Giles to his feet.

Giles stumbled and held onto Spike for support.

"Is everyone alright?" Giles whispered.

"Let's just worry about getting' you outta here first," Spike replied.

Giles nodded and the two Brits continued down the stairs, past the broken ground where the demon had emerged and out into the darkness where Xander was waiting with Anya.

Xander rushed forward to help Giles, Spike giving the young man a grateful smile.

"Where's the others?" Spike asked, the silent 'where's Buffy' hanging in the air.

"Tara and Willow are looking after the hostages.  They're fine…a little shaken up, but they weren't hurt too badly," Xander said.

Spike looked at him, silently begging to be told how the Slayer was doing.

"Angel said he'd take her to the hospital," Xander said.

Spike nodded thankfully and made a move to start the long walk home.

"We shoulda brought cars," Xander said tiredly.

"Doesn't matter," Spike replied.  "The good guys won in the end.  None of the hostages were eaten, the Nibblet's fine and we don't have to worry about that bloody invincible demon that Court was gonna become.  Or about the hellmouth opening."

A silence fell between them, the only sound was Giles laboured breathing and their feet padding against the concrete footpath.

~*~

When they reached Giles' apartment, they found Tara, Willow and Amy standing at the front door, Dawn sitting in one of the outdoor seats, her eyes closed, her head resting against her hand.

Willow looked at the group, noticing the absence of Buffy and Angel.

"Where's Buffy?" Willow asked softly.

"Angel's taking her to the hospital," Giles replied, opening the door to his apartment and ushering the group inside, Spike helping Dawn to her feet and onto a couch in the living room.

"We should really get to the hospital," Xander said, shifting nervously on his feet.  He had seen Court drink from Buffy and he had seen her collapse weakly, a sight he hadn't ever wanted to see.

Spike nodded his agreement and looked towards Dawn.  "Bite size looks like she could use a doctor as well."

Giles picked up the keys to his convertible and looked at the group, silently deciding who should go to the hospital with him.

"Spike, if you could help me get Dawn to the car.  Is anyone else injured?" Giles asked.

There were shakes of the head to tell him that they were fine, except for being exhausted.

"I'd suggest you go home, sleep for as long as you need.  If you need to be in contact with us, then we'll be at the hospital."

Willow nodded and took hold of Tara's hand.  

"Buffy's gonna be alright, though…right?" she asked nervously.

Giles could only stare past her, finally turning away from the redheaded witch and making his way to the car.

He passed his keys to Spike who silently understood that the Watcher was in no shape to be driving.  He took a seat in the back with Dawn resting her head on his lap.

"She'll be alright Rupert," Spike said from the front as they made their way to Sunnydale Memorial.  "It'll take a helluva lot more than an invincible demon to kill your Slayer."

Giles nodded but stayed in his silent reflection for the remained of the trip.

~*~

Angel raced into the hospital, the unconscious Slayer in his arms.  He was painfully reminded of racing her to the hospital just before graduation when it had been himself that had drained her.

"We need help here!" Angel cried, his voice filled with panic.

His cries got the attention of a nurse who, seeing the state of the young girl in Angel's arms, ran to get a doctor.

Angel quickly took her into an empty room, depositing the small lifeless body onto a bed.

"What happened?" the doctor demanded as he walked into the room.

Angel was beginning to pace.  He could hear Buffy's heartbeat becoming slower and slower, and, as with any vampire, he knew it was about to stop beating altogether.

"She was attacked.  They looked like a bunch of street kids," Angel said quickly, trying to think on his feet.

The doctor turned to the nurse who had joined him beside the bed.

"We need to get her into emergency.  Do you know if she has any allergies?" the doctor asked vampire.

Angel shook his head, his eyes staying firmly on Buffy.

"No you don't know, or no she doesn't have any?" the doctor asked, his voice desperate, but still patient.

"She's not allergic to anything," Angel replied.

The doctor nodded once and turned back to Buffy.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave," the young nurse told him gently.  "We need our space."

Angel nodded, knowing the drill of the hospital.  He stepped outside, leaning against the doorway.  

He felt a tear slip down his cheek as he heard the nurse whisper to the doctor.  "It doesn't look good does it?"

"No, I'm afraid it doesn't."

He breathed a sigh of relief as he saw Giles, Spike and Dawn come into the hospital, Spike carrying Dawn who looked as though she were asleep.

"How is she?" Spike asked.

Angel shook his head softly.

"The doctor said that…it doesn't look good," Angel said.

Spike closed his eyes and tried not to let the room spin out of control.  He woke Dawn up and gently put her onto one of the hard plastic seats.

The blonde vampire began pacing the corridor, his eyes firmly towards Buffy's door.

Giles looked tiredly at Angel, hating that he had to ask the vampire he hated for anything.

"What happened to her?" Giles asked.

Angel looked pained for a moment and Spike quickly stepped forward.

"I didn't see all of it.  Looks like she got bitten, probably by Court, not to mention the little snack fest that another group 'ad on 'er earlier," Spike said.

"She should be alright though," Giles said desperately.

"She wasn't just drained," Angel said.

Giles looked towards the brooding vampire and waited for him to continue.

"It looks like her hand was broken.  Like every bone in her was broken.  And she uh…"

"She got shot by a bolt just here," Spike finished, pointing to his lower abdomen.

Giles closed his eyes, trying not to imagine how painful it must have been for her to continue in the battle with her injuries.

Dawn whimpered a little, hating that once again she had been the cause of her sister's pain. 

Spike looked towards Dawn and looked down the corridor.               

"You two need to see a doctor," Spike said, quickly walking towards the reception area for someone who could help them.

Giles looked towards the tear-streaked Dawn and tried to give a smile.

"It's my fault.  Again.  It's always my fault," Dawn whispered.

Giles shook his head vehemently.  "It's not your fault Dawn.  None of this is your fault.  Nothing that happened with Glory and none of what happened here tonight, understand?"

"How?  How is it not my fault?" She whispered tearfully.

"Buffy would have gone into battle for complete strangers and had the same injuries.  Dawn, you can't help that you're the Key anymore than Buffy can help being the Slayer," Giles explained.

Dawn nodded a little, too tired to really concentrate on anything apart from being extremely cold and extremely afraid that her sister was going to die.  Again.

Spike came back after a few minutes, a doctor following him.  Giles gave a small but grateful smile and let the doctor examine Dawn before letting his own injuries be tended to.

Halfway through the doctor's examination the doors to Buffy's room opened and a doctor came out.  Spike didn't like the look on his face at all.

"Are you the family of Buffy Summer's?" the doctor asked.

Dawn nodded.  "I'm her sister."

The doctor nodded and looked towards the other three men, all looking the worse for wear.  "And you three?"

"We're friends," Spike answered without hesitation.

The doctor nodded, seeming to accept the answer.

"Buffy's injuries are fairly extensive.  It looks as though her right hand has had every bone shattered by something extremely forceful.  I'm not even going to ask why a group of muggers were carrying a bow and arrow, but she's lucky that the bolt didn't damage any of her internal organs.  As for the blood loss, we've been able to give her some blood.  She's stable at the moment, but still unconscious," the doctor explained.

"Can we see her?" Spike asked.

The doctor shook his head sadly.  "I'm sorry, but…she's in no condition to have visitors at the moment.  Especially ones who aren't family.  All I can suggest is that you go home, get a good nights rest and come back in the morning."

The doctor turned and left the group standing there, still feeling no more at ease than before the doctor had explained what was going on.

"I'm not leavin' her with no one watchin' her.  She'd be a target for any vamps look for a quick feed on the Slayer," Spike said angrily.

Giles nodded.  "It would be best if you stayed here.  I'll be here before sunrise, that way you can go home, get some rest."

Spike nodded and sat down in the hard plastic seats outside of Buffy's door.

"I wanna stay," Dawn said softly.

Spike looked up at her and gently touched her hand.  She stepped towards him and looked down at his tear filled eyes.

"There's nothing you can do here Nibblet.  Best go home, get some sleep.  You can come see your big sis in the morning," he said gently.

Dawn hesitated, but finally nodded her agreement.  She let go of Spike's hand and stepped beside Giles who gently led her away from the hospital, leaving Spike to keep guard of the injured Slayer.


	11. One Good Day

CHAPTER TEN: ONE GOOD DAY

_"Hullo pet," the brown haired man said to her, smiling softly at her._

_She smiled back, a little confused as to why she was seeing him again._

_"Where am I?" she asked._

_"Between life and death," he replied.  "Again."_

_She wracked her brain, trying to remember what had happened.  "Court.  Did…do you know if Court's dead?"_

_William nodded and held out his hand to her.  As soon as their palms made contact, a million images flashed before her.  _

_The fog descending, Court almost defeating her on the stairs when he had broken her hand and tried to drain her blood; Angel and Spike defeating the vampires, Xander, Tara and Anya getting the sacrifices out of the warehouse; Court shooting the crossbow and wounding her stomach, and eventually she saw herself fall.  _

_"Yhiddy killed Court for betrayin' 'im.  Looks as though Yhiddy won't be back in the human dimension again either.  Too risky."_

_Buffy nodded and went to take her hand away from William's. He kept a hold of it and grinned at her._

_"Not so fast pet.  You've got some choices to make," he said._

_She looked at him sceptically, unsure of what to expect.  "Like what?"_

_He smiled and motioned to the right.  A door appeared in front of them, a plaque above it saying 'Eternity'._

_"You can go in there, or…you can go back home.  Be with 'im."_

_"The Powers are giving me another chance?" she asked incredulously._

_He shook his head.  "No, see, you're not dead pet.  But, you can fight to keep living, or…you can let go and…you remember how peaceful it was, right?  With me and yer mum."_

_She shook her head.  "I can't forget.  It was beautiful there," she said a little wistfully._

_He hesitated a moment before kissing her gently.  "You know, I fell in love with you the moment he laid eyes on you.  I was so afraid that he'd kill you and…it frightened me that I could become so attached to anyone.  But you love him."_

_She nodded and gently kissed his cheek.  "You're a big part of him too Will.  He can't escape you, just like you can't escape him."_

_"I know."_

_"Oh, and by the way, I'm still pissed off with you," she said angrily.  "You said you'd come back with me."_

_He shook his head gently and smiled.  "I wish I could have come back with you luv, but…that's not my world anymore.  And even though he and I are so similar…we're not the same people."_

_"I hated you for it.  When I got back," she admitted softly._

_"I know.  I was watching you the whole time.  He loves you, you know.  They all do."_

_She nodded and let go of his hand.  "I have to go back."_

_He smiled gently and put a gentle hand to her cheek.  "I'll be waiting here for you."_

_He wiped an errant tear from the corner of her eyes and smiled at her. _

_"Tell mom I said hi," she said softly._

_She stepped back and watched as he smiled one last time before turning and walking through the doorway.  She closed her eyes and opened them again, somehow not surprised to find herself standing in front of the Powers That Be._

_"Back again Slayer," The First commented._

_She shrugged a little and looked at the four of them.  Each of them wore almost identical smiles._

_"If you don't stop dying to save the world we may have to give you a very stern talking to," the Second chastised lightly._

_"I'll try to refrain from any other apocalypses for the time being then," she replied._

_The Four of them laughed and the First took a step towards her._

_"You know what it means to choose to go back, do you not?" he asked._

_She nodded.  "I know what it means.  I know I don't have a lot of time left, but…I want to have what little I do have left."_

_The First nodded and took her by the hand, leading her past the other Three._

_"I should not be warning you of this, but…you only have another two years.  You'll be the oldest Slayer on record, but…it is destined that you will die.  I can't tell you when exactly but…I sense that you are holding back on something life altering.  If I may suggest that you take a chance and enjoy what you have."_

_She nodded and smiled at him gratefully.  "Thank you."_

_He nodded and let go of her hand.  "You're welcome.  Now go.  Live and enjoy it.  We'll meet again soon."_

He opened a door and motioned for Buffy to go through.  She did so, closing her eyes to guard herself against a blinding light.  She felt the world spinning, and it stopped, leaving her lying on her back.

Confused, she opened her eyes, her eyelids struggling to open properly.  It was then that she realised that she was in a hospital bed, her body exhausted and her mind running rampant.

She tried to shift her position and groaned with pain.  She stopped trying to move and instead just closed her eyes to wait.

~*~

Spike sat out in the corridor wringing his hands.  He couldn't sit still, and it was becoming quite an effort to remain seated.  Spike looked up sharply as he heard a small, pained groan coming from inside Buffy's room.

He was on his feet in an instant and nearly in the door when he heard a nurse call out to him.

"You can't go in there!"

Spike glared at the young nurse who held his ground.  "You can't go in there sir," the nurse repeated.

"She's awake!" Spike cried.

The nurse looked sceptical, having heard about the young woman who had been nearly beaten to death.  Of course, this was Sunnydale, and stranger things had happened, the nurse thought.

He opened up the door and walked in, seeing the girl still lying there, her eyes closed.

"Sir, she's not awake," the nurse said.

Spike looked around the door at the prone form of the Slayer on the bed.  He saw her struggle to open her eyes, and, pushing past the nurse, he raced to her side, taking her uninjured hand gently.

"Buffy," he whispered.

She opened her eyes to see Spike with tears forming.  She smiled softly and went to speak, but was stopped by a tube down her throat.

The nurse looked amazed as he saw the young girl open her eyes.  Without another word, he retreated from the room in search of a doctor.

"You're in hospital luv," he whispered.  "Don't try and speak.  You're pretty badly hurt."

"T'others?" she asked, her throat aching as she tried to get the word out.

"They're all fine.  We won, pet," he said.

She smiled and nodded, her eyes closing once more.

A doctor entered the room and saw Spike sitting protectively at Buffy's side.

"You say she just woke up a few minutes ago?" the doctor asked the nurse beside him.

The nurse nodded and handed the doctor a clipboard with the details of Buffy's injuries recorded on it.

"Are you certain?" the doctor asked incredulously, scanning down the list of multiple injuries that the young girl on the bed had endured.

The doctor looked at Buffy who opened her eyes again weakly.  

"Takes a helluva lot more to kill a Slayer," Spike whispered in Buffy's ear.  She gave a gentle smile and tiredly squeezed Spike's hand.

"One…good…day," she replied slowly.

Spike almost cried at the remembrance of that conversation.

"Never a good day pet.  Not with you gone," he said.

The doctor watched the exchange between the young couple, smiling as he saw the love and affection there, even if he couldn't hear what they were saying.

"It seems, Miss Summers, that you've come out of the woods.  We'll have to keep you here a fair while longer though, you've sustained rather extensive injuries," the doctor explained.

Buffy nodded her understanding and turned to smile at Spike.

"Stay?" she asked quietly.

Spike nodded and gave the doctor a meaningful glare.  "I'm not going anywhere pet."

~*~

Giles opened the door hastily and saw Spike sitting there watching over the sleeping Slayer.  Spike put a finger to his lips indicating for the Watcher to remain quiet.  A doctor hovered by Buffy's bedside, checking her chart, in awe of the rapid improvements in the young woman's body.

Spike stood up, placing a gentle kiss on Buffy's forehead before taking Giles out into the hallway.

"She woke up about an hour ago, but…the doctors are still pretty worried about her," Spike explained.

Giles nodded, not entirely unworried for his Slayer either.  "How did she seem?"

"Alright.  She asked how the others were.  I told her everyone made it out alright," he said.

"Thanks to her," Giles said.

Spike nodded his agreement. "How's the Nibblet?"

"Understandably upset.  Still blaming herself.  She cried herself to sleep.  I woke her up just after you called, told her that Buffy was sleeping naturally now.  God, it was awful," Giles said taking a seat on one of the plastic chairs.  "But, she smiled and rolled over.  She was sleeping a lot better.  Xander's there with her."

Spike nodded and took a seat next to the Watcher.  

"She wouldn't have coped if Buffy had died again," Spike commented.

Giles removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes.

"I doubt any of us would survive her dying again.  So soon."

Spike sighed, hating to think so negatively, but knowing that it was also a rational thought.  "I dunno how we're gonna get through the next time."

Giles looked at him sharply, appalled that he could even suggest such a thing.  After a moments consider however, Giles knew that Spike was right.  No matter how hard it was to think about, Buffy was still the Slayer which meant that she came with a limited lifetime.

"It won't be easy," Giles said.

Spike shook his head.  "It never is though, is it?"

He growled a little and threw his hands down in frustration.  "In some ways, I wish she hadn't come back.  She…her death was so…it was the death of a Slayer, a true Slayer.  It took a bloody hellgod to defeat her, and even then she didn't have to die.  Sacrificing herself for the bloody world.  Always had to go out with a bang," Spike said.

Giles smiled a little at Spike's description of Buffy's death.  What would have been painful a few months ago, he know looked upon with pride.  Buffy had overcome fear and had managed to put everything and everyone else first for one final time.

"I don't think she'll be able to top that one."

"I highly doubt it."

The door swung open and both men looked up to see a doctor come into the hallway.

"Are you here with Miss Summers?" he asked.

Giles and Spike both nodded, wearing identical expressions of concern.  

"She just woke up a moment ago.  I told her she had two visitors and she requested that you both be sent in.  But, please remember that I am bending the rules for you here, so please, do not get her wound up.  I'll have to ask both of you to leave if she becomes overly anxious.  If her healing continues at the rate it has been, she should be home in about two days."

Spike and Giles nodded and in one fluid movement, they were on their feet and walking towards the door.  Spike stepped back and allowed Giles to enter first.

Giles smiled at his Slayer as he saw her sitting up in bed. He moved to her bed and hugged her gently, brushing away a stray piece of her hair and tucking it behind her ear.

"Oh, my dear girl," he whispered.  "I think you're perhaps trying to give me a heart attack."

She smiled at him and hugged him back.  "Didn't mean to scare you Giles.  Just one of those days."

He pulled back and placed a hand on her cheek, smiling at her fondly.  "You seem to have far too many of them for my liking."

She grinned and placed her hand over his.  "Don't worry, I'm done with the heroics."

"Well, thank god for that."

He stood up and moved away so that Spike could sit beside her on the bed.

"Nice to see you again luv," he said softly, whispering into her ear as he pulled her closer to him.

She smiled and kissed him gently.  "I love you."

He smiled, almost feeling his heart beginning to pound in his chest.  She made him feel alive!!

"I love you,' he replied, gently kissing the tip of her nose.

Giles smiled as he sat himself down in the chair.  Spike may not have been his ideal choice of a boyfriend for his Slayer, but he knew that she would never find anyone as loyal as the blond vampire.  And he knew that he would have to give her his blessings no matter what.

He wanted her in his life, and for that to happen, Giles knew that Spike would be attached to that package.  Perhaps, that package would even be a little longer than expected, seeing as he had someone to keep her safe.

"So," Buffy said when the silence became more tangible.  "When can I get outta this hell-hole?"

Giles smiled at her choice of phrasing.  "After what you saw earlier, how can this possibly compare?"

Buffy grinned at her Watcher.  "This place is far scarier than that factory.  It's way too sterile in here."

Giles laughed a little and watched as Spike squeezed the Slayers hand gently. 

"Doc said you'd be outta here in about two days.  But only if you're good," he teased a little.

Buffy pouted, earning her a grin from both her Watcher and the vampire.  "Two days?  That's like a lifetime," she whined.

Giles just rolled his eyes good-naturedly.  


	12. Epilogue

EPILOGUE

TWO YEARS LATER 

Spike and Giles stood side by side at the small headstone, both men with tears in their eyes.

"She did good Rupert," Spike said softly.

He knew she wouldn't be coming back this time.  Giles was a Watcher without a Slayer.  And Spike was a man without his world.  Even though they had each other's friendships, they knew that they were alone again.

Giles just nodded, unable to tear his eyes away from the headstone.  

Buffy Anne Summers-Kennedy

Loyal Friend.

Devoted Wife.  Beloved Mother.

1981 – 2003

Spike shifted the tiny weight that was resting in his hip, thankful that for just one day William Alexander was being quiet.  Almost as though he understood that this was a silent moment.

"I seem to recall you saying that this wouldn't be easy," Giles said.

Spike closed his eyes, afraid that he would fall over.  "It never is," he said, echoing his words from when Buffy had been given the all clear from the doctors.

"I didn't think it would be so soon though," Giles said.

Spike nodded thoughtfully.  "I think she knew," he said.

Giles looked at him, surprised that Spike seemed so calm about this.  "The night that she…when she died…we'd already done our goodbyes.  It was like she knew that she wouldn't make it this time."

"At least we know she's in a better place than this.  She's finally at peace," Giles said.  "No more slaying."

Spike shook his head, grateful that he had the knowledge that a part of him was taking care of her.

He shifted young William in his arms for a moment, trying to dig into his pockets for something that Buffy had asked him to give to her Watcher if anything were to happen.  Now seemed as good a time as any.

"She wanted me to give you this," he said, handing over the envelope.

Giles took it hesitantly, as though the envelope would seal everything that had happened in the last two years.  With shaking hands, he opened it and slowly read.

_Dear Giles,_

_If you're reading this, then it means something has happened.  Or else, you went snooping through my drawers and got really curious, but…I highly doubt that that's the case.  _

_I guess things are finally over for me.  In a way, I'm a little bit glad.  A part of me has wanted to go back to where I was for a long time.  It was so beautiful there Giles.  I'm not afraid of dying anymore.  I know that when you're time comes, you'll enjoy it there.  I'm sure there's a library somewhere there just for you._

_I know you haven't approved of some of the things that have happened in the last few years, but, I'm so grateful that you were standing there by my side throughout it all.  You've been the father that I never had.  Thank you so much for everything you've done for me, and for putting up with all of the horrible things I did to you.  You truly are one of the best friends I've ever had._

_I can't say that I knew that everything would turn out like this.  Becoming pregnant certainly came as a huge surprise.  Spike proposing may have been a bigger one.  You giving me away was just a given, because who else could possibly have taken over that role?_

_I know we never said any of the mushy stuff, cos…you would get all British and start cleaning you're glasses, but…I love you.  You've been there through thick and thin and I never said thank you enough to you.  Even though it's too late for me to say it to you face-to-face, I can write it and still mean it with all of my heart._

_Thank you._

_I have just one more favour to ask of you Giles.  Please, look after my Spike.  I made him promise not to do anything that couldn't be taken back.  But…if something happens, please, I'm asking you to look after my little Will.  Make sure he knows the truth about what happened, about who I was.  I don't want my little boy afraid of the dark though.  Will you teach him like you taught me?  I hope he won't try your patience like I did though.  Make sure he doesn't step out of line.  And please don't let him forget me._

_And don't let Spike spoil him!_

_I wish I could have both worlds.  My Spike and my little Will here with me.  But I want them both to live.  And you too Rupert Giles.  Be happy._

_Tell Spike I love him.  And I love you too._

_Your Slayer,_

_Buffy Anne Summers-Kennedy._

END


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